Hey You, Electric Blue!
by panda8785
Summary: Michele Walker has lived her life of stress, worry, and testing, but now she's trapped in a universe all too familiar. How easily is it to change the events of such a popular web-series. Rated T just in case.
1. Teaser

**Call it cliche, but I've been wanting to do this for a while :) don't hate.**

**Character: Michele Walker**

**Age:20**

* * *

><p>I last remember falling. No wait... I remember going to bed after watching the most recent episodes of RWBY and Red versus Blue. After that, there was the sensation of falling, but then... Nothing. How could I have forgotten such useful information? Amnesia? No... It has to just be stress. That's right. I get forgetful under stress. That has to be it.<p>

I slowly shifted my weight as the pain in my shoulder and ribs nearly made my mind split. The pain was unbearable. Once I was able to open my eyes again, I better examined myself in a black sports bra, black shorts, a darkly bruised torso, and nearly beet red bandages around my right shoulder. Slowly enough, I looked up from where I had been and saw a place of some familiarity, but how had I known this place. It seemed almost like... A pelican from Halo. I rushed my hands to my head as a headache formed at my temples. I examined the area once. No one... No wait. There was a man with blonde hair and blue eyes who stared at me, letting off a goofy little smile.

"Good morning!" He spoke up from where he had been sitting. He wore regulation blue armor (just like in Halo), but kept his helmet on his lap.

"H-hi." I stammered a bit, since I usually don't negotiate with those of the strange, "May I ask who you are?" I smiled very weakly.

"You don't remember?" He pouted a bit.

"I think I'd know if I knew you." I sighed, extending my hand as if offering a handshake, "Hi, my name is Michele Walker. I am currently in my second year of college, and-"

"I know who you are." He acted almost like a child, "but if you really do forget... My name is Caboose."

"C-Caboose..." My face froze, showing my shock through every square inch.

"Yup!" He continued to smile as turbulence began to mildly afect the ride.

_'That's right.' _I thought to myself, '_I went to bed last night, and I woke up falling. I landed on something, then was put under medical care. About an hour after that, I was dispatched. They were convinced I was a soldier, but that doesn't explain how I got into this mess in the first place.'_

_"_Are you okay?" He notice my faces of confusion.

"Y-yeah." I laughed nervously, "Just trying to remember some details is all." The Pelican shook, indicating its landing.

"I wonder what the Leader's gonna be like." He mildly cheered, "I'm sure we're gonna be best friends!"

"Unless he turns out to be a prick." I mumbled under my break, "Or an intelligent AI with such a snarky attitude."

"AI?" He looked back at me with confusion, "What does the A stand for?"

"I don't want to have to deal with this now." I shot a glare back at him as the door... er ramp... what ever it's called, slowly lowered. Only then had I noticed the M8O8 Main Battle Tank and the pile of electric blue and black accented armor next to me. I looked at it for a moment, trying to figure out how to put it on.

"You act like you've never seen your armor before." He seemed amused.

"I'm just trying to remember how to get it on." I lied, "I tend to get really forgetful under stress."

"I know. Just remember training."

"I'm sorry." I sighed, "I don't know who you think I am, but I've never been through military training."

"Sure you have. We all have." He didn't get my point.

"No I haven't." I spoke slow enough for him to be able to process the information.

"But, I saw you." He gave off a more worried than confused expression as I gave off an expression of both confusion and worry.

"Wait a minute. I-" I was cut off by a man demanding us to leave the Pelican, for we were at Blood Gulch Outpost Alpha. I turned to face my armor once again as I felt the heat of the probably inhabitable planet. I got up and started with buckling into the armor, taking my time so that I got it right. I admit, there were some moments where I could look away and put my armor on, almost like muscle memory, and it wasn't as heavy as I thought it would be. Maybe I have been in this universe longer than I have thought. We walked to blue base in silence as the tank followed our tail.


	2. Theory of the Butterfly Effect

We went to the Blue Base and introduced ourselves.

"Hey." Tucker spoke up as he motioned to the tank. I can't believe I've forgotten about his perverted aspect, "I have this sweet ride over here. Maybe we could-" I stopped him right there.

"No way in Hell." I glared at him and sighed, "You can't pick up girls in a tank. You shouldn't even try."

"Sure I can." He laughed.

"No you can't." I spoke slowly.

"Just stop." Church snapped.

I sighed once again and stared at the older man, "Alright, then." I started for the base, trying not to grab my injured side and show weakness, ever though the pain is the worst I've ever experienced. I wouldn't doubt it if it were broken ribs.

"And where the Hell do you think you're going?" He yelled after me.

"I'm gonna guard the god damn flag." I yelled back, "Send Caboose in when he starts to irritate you." I admit, I could've reacted better. I just have my mind set on possible paradoxes. Ever heard of the butterfly effect? I'm afraid that something like that my happen.

"ROOKIE! SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP, YOU'RE DRIVING ME CRAZY, GET IN THERE!" I heard Church yell... I can't believe I have forgotten this scene. The room I had been in had gone silent until Caboose stepped in.

"Hi Walker." Caboose spoke in his usual, cheery tone.

"Who told you to call me that?" I looked up at him from where I had been sitting as he stood at attention by the flag.

"You did." He faced the doorway. I guess that makes sense. I mean, I have liked my last name more than my first. Any way, people refer to each other as either code or last names.

"You really need to fill me in on how much you know about me." I held my shoulder for a second, "What are you doing, anyway?" I tried to stay clueless.

"They told me to stay at attention until the General gets here."

"Just sit down and forget about that." I pat the floor next to me. This is one change to the series that I can handle. He happily obliged to the not so much of an order that I had given him.

"Are you okay?" He looked back at me. It was hard to tell, what with the helmet and all, but he seemed somewhat concerned.

"Why would I not be?" He turned his attention to my injured shoulder, "Oh? Yeah, I'm fine. I just have to reduce some strain is all." I watched as he tried to translate what I had just said, "If I don't move as much, I'll get better faster."

"The mean doctor lady did say that you need more nap times."

"Well, if that's the case, I might as well relax." I looked down at my lap, only now realizing that my helmet hadn't been on anymore, "Do you happen to know how I got hurt?"

"You went on some assignment, then someone was carrying you, and after that you were asleep and the doctor gave you band-aids. She also said something about anemia."

"Please tell me you mean actual medical stuff and not actually band-aids... and you mean amnesia and not anemia, right. 'Cuz those are two different things."

"You're the smart one."

"I like to think so." I laughed as I lied on my back. The room went silent, and all that was left was-

"Why is everyone so freakin' rude in this canyon?" Speak of the devil. Here comes Donut.

"What can we do for you, Sir?" I nudged Caboose towards the man in currently red armor and watched their conversation.

"Yes, Sir! I assume you're here about this." Caboose turned to face the flag of team blue.

"Wait. Is that all you have?" Donut seemed some what disappointed.

"Yes, Sir." I stood up, trying to support my weight on my left side. Nausea had already begun to affect me, and it's hard to tell if it's from blood lost or because I had been sitting still for a good amount of time and sprung back up, "I'm sorry for the inconvenience, but we don't have anything else, unless you want to take empty rounds, or maybe a box of tissues."

"What about elbow grease?"

"No."

"Headlight fluid?"

"Sorry, but you can take the flag, if you want."

"Alright, but they're gonna give me shit for coming back with just this stupid flag." He picked up the flag and left. Shit... What have I just done. I took one of Caboose's scenes from him. Butterfly effect will eat at me later.

"You alright?" Caboose turned to face me.

"Yeah. Just go tell Church the General stopped by and took the flag." I slowly walked back to the wall I had previously propped myself up against, "He's gonna want to know as soon as possible.


	3. You're Not My Superior

Church was infuriated when he found that we had given our flag. He ordered everyone to get onto the roof of the base, where he stood with a sniper rifle. I made my way to the edge and sat down.

"What the Hell do you think you're doing?" The leader of blue team got upset at me, "Stand up."

"Fine." I stood up, trying to use one of the pillar things for support.

"There. There he is." Tucker spoke up

Church used the sniper rifle and looked through the scope, "Where... Oh, yeah. I got him. He's sneaking around back behind the cliffs."

"He must be one smart son of a bitch."

"Or maybe he's just lost." I suggested, but got ignored.

"Oh shit... Hey Tucker, look at his armor. It's red."

"Oh man. That means it's their sergeant."

I sighed, "The only teams here are the REDS and the blues. How the Hell can you tell who this guy is if that whole team is all red?" Once again, I was ignored.

"Well that makes sense." Church remained oblivious, "At least now we know how he got by our defenses."

"What defenses?!" I yelled, causing everyone to stare back at me.

Caboose was the first to break the silence, "Uh... You know he came out the back door where you guys were standing."

"Yeah, okay," Tucker spoke in almost a bored tone, "let's take him out then."

"Roger that." Church kept his arms steady, "Okay, say goodnight, Sarge." Four shots were fired, but not one hit its mark, "Aw crap."

"You're not really good at that thing, are you." I sat back down.

"Rookie, just shut the fuck up." Shoulda kept that line to Tucker. I sat still as they continued to formulate their lame plan.

"Oh great." Tucker was disappointed, "Now he's taunting us. That's just embarrassing."

"Alright, that's it. I've had it." Church was mad now, "Rookies, you stay here. Me and Tucker, we'll head through the teleporter and cut them off at the pass."

"Tucker and I." I mumbled under my breath. Yeah, I have an issue with improper grammar. Sue me.

"Right." Caboose actually seemed alert.

"Let's go."

"There is no way I'm going through that thing." Tucker took a small, almost unnoticeable step away from the teleporter.

"Afraid of black stuff." I almost whispered as he turned his head to face me. Shit. I had forgotten about his strange hearing ability.

"Tucker we don't have time for this." Church spoke as the teal (?) soldier turned to face his leader, "Why would they give us a teleporter that doesn't work?"

"I don't know, Why would they give us a tank no one can drive." Tucker and I spoke in utter synchronization. Curse me now, before I make this worse... I was met with silence.

"We already tested the teleporter, remember." He had been talking to Tucker, but watched me. Thank God for this helmet, or else my fear would have been evident.

"We through rocks through it!"

"Yeah, and so what? The rocks came out the other side, didn't they?"

"Yeah, but they were all hot, and covered with black stuff."

"Oh, I guess that's what this is all about. you're afraid of a little black stuff?"

"Yes... I am... I'm... afraid of... black... stuff." He spoke slower than what I remember from the actual episodes, as if he had realized something, but didn't bother to say it.

I stood up as Church began to slowly lift up his gun, "Alright then, Private Tucker, Sir." I began to push him, "Rocks aren't people, but don't worry you'll live." He tried to turn to face me, but he ended up falling into the portal... not my intention, but effective. We watched as Tucker, expectantly, didn't come out of the other end.

"Yeah, I've... uh... I've decided I'm not going to be using the teleporter." Church ran off, "Rookies, you stay here!"

"Wait!" I yelled after him, "If all we're going to be doing is staying here, can't you at least show us to our rooms?!" I was ignored once again. Oh, how I can't wait until the Alpha is fried by the EMP, then I'll be able to implement a better first impression into Epsilon.

"What now?" Caboose walked up to me.

"We wait." I sighed, sat down, and let my feet dangle off the edge of the base, "And Caboose, if you have to decide whether or not to stay of take the tank, go with the smarter decision."

"Will do."

We watched in silence as we waited for Church to corner Donut and Tucker appeared out of the other end of the teleporter. Ah, time travel theories that I don't get to intervene in. The trick is acceptance. This is probably all a dream, so why not have a little fun with it... not completely change it, I do not recommend that, but subtle changes in order to not drive you insane. I slowly directed my attention to the M12-LRV... or warthog as we all well know... made it's way towards half the blue team and a red carrying a blue flag.

"And I wonder where you are." I began to unconsciously sing Half life from season 12. One of these days, I'm gonna get myself in trouble, "And I wonder what you wore. And I'm lost inside a bar. And I'm drunk inside a war. And I wonder where you are." I turned to face Caboose, who had been staring intently at me, "What?"

"I think I've told you this before, but you have a very pretty voice."

"Thanks?" I looked at him for a moment, "Now, would probably be a good time to explain what happened before we got onto the ship here." Donut began to run towards our base (which he was later turned around) as Simmons still had Church and Tucker cornered, "Or, maybe not."

Caboose stood up and looked through the scope of a sniper rifle, "Oh ma, that's not good. Oh my God that jeep has a really big gun." He put down the gun.

"Well, let's get into the tank." I stood up and we walked up to the tank. Lucky for me, there were two seats. Yes, I know how weak the reds and blues are, but I'm also wounded. I let Caboose go in first while I went around the back of the tank to check on future Church. He stood there a little stunned, "If you want to change anything, just stay put. By the looks of your reaction, friendly fire's on, right? Have fun being a 'ghost' once more." I laughed and turned around in order to get into the tank.

"So, it was since the very beginning that you knew about us?" Church spoke, barely in my range of hearing. I turned to face him, and opened my mouth, but I heard Sheila talk about her tutorial program, and realized I had no time to talk. Everything else carried out just like the episodes.


	4. I Think Now They're Suspicious

"Hey Rookie." Tucker walked to where I had been sitting, "You wanna help me get this black stuff off my armor?"

"Um." I closed my book and looked up at him, "How about no."

"Come on." He pleaded.

"No." I turned to look at the red base and the remnants of our once M8O8 Main Battle Tank, "How's your luck been with reaching command?"

"Not so great." He sighed and sat next to me, "It's either they're ignoring us or a weak connection.

"Sounds like a tough time on your part." I opened my book once again and continued to read.

"What are you reading?" He actually seemed interested.

"Of Mice and Men. I haven't read it since my second year of high school. Thought I could take another gander." I finished reading the page as he seemed to watch me intently. Must be weird for him to see someone read with a helmet. It's probably weird for him to see anyone read at all, really, since Sim Soldiers were chosen out of the dumbest of students, "You know what." I closed the book and stood up, "I'll help you clean your armor."

"Finally."

"But, I'm not going anywhere near the cod piece."

"Fine." His voice seemed disappointed.

* * *

><p>"Come in Blue Command. This is Blood Gulch Outpost Alpha. Do you read me?" Tucker made another attempt to call command.<p>

"Alright. Your armor is clean." I said as I watched my reflection in his armor.

"Did you get all the black stuff off?"

"I believe so." I turned to face Caboose, who had just dropped his rag to the ground.

"Hello! Command! We need help." Tucker began to talk to Command. Oh, how I wish I knew how to use the radio, "I don't know what the technical military term is for it, but uh, we're pretty fucked up down here. We need men!"

"How long have you guys been down here." I laughed under my own breath, having forgotten that Tucker had been standing right in front of me.

Tucker turned to face me, but continued to talk to Command, "No, not like that. We need more men to help us." His tone seemed a lot different from the actual episode. It was more... concerned than embarrassed, "Yeah that got blown up too... Yeah, we know... Sixteen days!?" He turned to face his original direction, "That's almost two weeks!"

"Two weeks and two days." I sighed and sat down.

"I like the 'in an hour' one." Caboose pitched in.

"Yeah," Tucker turned and faced Caboose, "me too. Roger that Command, we prefer the quicker solution... Whoever he is, make sure he can fix a tank." He hung up and turned to face me. Even in his armor, he looked like he was about to say something.

"Well, how's this for a first day at Blood Gulch Outpost Alpha?" I spoke meagerly.

"What's a freelancer?" Caboose broke the tension. Thank God for that little idiot.

Tucker let out a sigh and faced the said idiot, "Freelancers are independent, they're not red or blue."

"They're just guns for hire, who'll fight for whoever has the most money." I stood up and rest my hand on Caboose's shoulder, "I'm gonna see if there's a med-kit or something inside. I'll be back in a bit." I turned around to find "ghost" Church waiting.

"Shh." He made his voice as quiet as possible, thinking I would scream. Actually, I think he was more surprised when I just walked by. Last thing I heard from our favorite Blood Gulch Trio was the famous, "Tucker. Tuuucker," that we all know and love.

I just walked around. Honestly, my shoulder isn't bothering me, and I just needed an excuse to get out of there. It's fun to watch them through a screen, it's a hinderance to stand next to them. I found the med-kit and meticulously removed my armor in order to change the bandages.

The wound wasn't as bad as I expected it to be. I admit, it wasn't a beautiful sight, but it was at least bearable look at. It was a bullet wound about an inch deep that remained directly under the shoulder bone. I wrapped the wound in a new gauze and took a few pills of acetaminophen in order to dull the pain. Who ever the hell is running this army, they're doing a shitty job. Putting an injured soldier into war is probably one of the dumbest decisions for someone to make... unless I somehow begged them to go. I am stubborn, for my own good, and I wouldn't be surprised if I intentionally put myself in danger out of pure ambition.

"Whoa. Heterochromia." Tucker stood in front of me.

"Don't make fun of my genetics." I laughed, "What next? My hips? Or is it my strangely abnormal hair color?"

"Your hair seems like a normal color to me."

I scoffed, "Nah, man. It's red... well, more of a scarlet than the common red."

"No, it's brown." He tried to hold back some laughter.

"No..." I spoke slowly, "It's red."

"Look for yourself. It's brown." He watched as I started to pull my hair in front of my eyes, "You're not color blind, are you?"

"No. I was born with red hair." I fumbled around with my fingers.

"You do have that streak of red... I hope that's not all of your hair that you've ever seen."

I found the streak of red he had been talking about, "Maybe I just dyed it..." I sighed.

"How do you not even know that?" He sat down next to me, probably expecting a long story.

"Well, hopefully just a month or two has escaped my memory. Worse case scenario, a year... probably."

"Amnesia?"

"At least you can pronounce it right." I sighed.

"Why do you say that?"

"Caboose said anemia." I started to put my armor back on and tried to sound interested, "So, what did Church have to say?"

"You... left before he showed up." He became suspicious.

"W-well..." I tried to think of my verbal escape route, "Church appeared in front of me on my way inside. He told me to stay quiet, and I kept my orders." No lie needed.

"You know, he did tell us to keep an eye on you."

"Because if I do something bad, he'll send his girlfriend after me." I shuddered, "I don't want to be pummeled to a pulp this week."

"I don't know what you're going on about, but I'd really like it if you'd hurry up and explain before our Freelancer gets here."

"Well," I turned to face him, "You'll find out soon enough. What's the point of explaining?"

* * *

><p>You know, I was freaking terrified of Allison while watching the episodes, but she's really not that bad in person. Yes, she's still hella scary, but not so bad.<p>

"That's basically it, Sir." Tucker was talking to Tex as she shot at Caboose. Poor guy was pleading for help through his helmet. I feel really bad for not stopping her, "They have five guys over their, and a big jeep."

"And your flag." Tex and I spoke at the same time. This time, it was just coincidence, for I've honestly forgotten that line.

"What do you mean by 'your flag?'" Tucker seemed to be on the verge of yelling at me, "It's your flag too."

"Well sorry." I folded my arms and watched a bullet go right past Caboose's head, "I don't know why I'm here, but there's no way I came to this hell hole willingly."

"You never change." I caught Tex mumble as she threw a grenade... Wait... What? She knows me somehow? At least now I have a sorce more reliable than a well-known idiot.

"Uh, hey, Tex?" Tucker started, but I intervened.

"I don't know what it's been like at your other bases, but we try not to use other soldiers as target practice here." She seemed to have been caught off guard at this. What impression do I have on her? Does she see me as a potential serial killer?!

"I'm scared." Caboose muttered. Tex went to play with her weapon and I motioned for the poor guy to make his way over to us. I'm actually glad he complied, since I have no clue what Tex woulda done if he stayed put.

"You alright there?" I let Tucker and Tex talk as I examined Caboose, not ignoring the scratch across his helment from a bullet grazing him.

"Uh... Yeah." He spoke sheepishly.

"Caboose, if your hurt, you need to let me know or else I can't help."

"He's really scary." He whimpered.

"Oh yeah. Plenty scary." I laughed, remembering seasons nine and ten. Oh, how I would have preferred to be stuck there rather than Blood Gulch Outpost.

I sat back down as Tex ran over to Red Base and the boys watched. I turned to face the entrance of our own base to see Church with an infuriated look across his face (it could even be seen through his helmet somehow), and he was waiting for his moment to teach us a lesson. I stood up, making sure to be quiet, as I walked to the door way.

"Listen." I whispered, "I know what it looks like, but.-"

"What the hell were you guys thinking." He nearly hissed at me, "I told you not to let Tex get involved."

"I'm sorry, but we needed her help. You're currently incapable of anything and-"

"Wait a minute." He caught on, "How do you know Tex is a girl?"

"Ah, did I slip up?" I laughed hesitantly, "Well, it's not hard to miss these things. You have to be an idiot to-"

He made a slap like motion to my face, but his transparent hand went through my skull, "How do you know Tex is a chick?" He spoke a little louder, but quiet enough so that the living men could not hear him.

"You want the long version or the short?"

"The easy version." Couldn't help but laugh at that, "What's so funny?"

"No, nothing." I sighed, a smile clean across my face. Thank God for helmets.

"... I got my eye on you." He turned his attention to Tucker and Caboose.

"Be sure to give 'em Hell once we get the flag back." I laughed and sat back down, "I bet you twenty bucks that Sidewinder will be mentioned."

"..." he turned his attention back to me in a sideways glance, "I'll take you up on that. If it does get mentioned, I bet it'll be from Tucker."

"Nah, Caboose." I laughed under my breath, "I'd shake on it, but your hand would just go through mine."

"You don't have to rub it in."

"Aren't you glad you died for this army."

"You know what... I actually cannot believe I died for this army."

"Yeah. You'll probably wish you didn't get shot by that tank." I sighed, waiting.

"Yeah, I got to take care of this real quick." He walked towards the two idiots, "Blue Team, flag returned." He spoke in a deep voice.

Tucker jumped at the sound, "What the... who said that?"

Church cleared his throat, "Sorry, that was me. I uh, I guess I had something stuck in my throat. Your flag is back, by the way." I tried not to laugh.

"Hey. It's Church." Caboose practically cheered.

"Yeah, it's me. Hey Caboose." There goes his irritated tone.

"Hey Church, what're you up to?" Ah, sweet innocence. Innocence is bliss, right?

"Caboose, ah-huh-huh, I'm not really here to make small-talk, okay? How'd you guys manage to get your flag back?" Yeah, I kinda toned out a bit of the conversation. I know how it carries out, anyways, "What was the one thing I told you guys the last time I appeared?"

"That Sidewinder is cold?!" Bingo.

"Twenty bucks." I chimed as Church turned to face me.

"Sorry. I'm broke." He turned to face Caboose once more, "What was the other one thing I told you?"

"Not to let him get involved?" Tucker broke out.

"Right, and what did you do?"

"We let him get involved."

"And not just a little involved, but how involved?"

"Very, very involved." Caboose ducked his head down.

I stood up and acted as if I had been paying attention, "Looks like someone just got captured."

"Shit." Church sighed as he began to formulate his "brilliant" idea.


	5. Omega

Thank God for which ever hour mark! I was actually getting really tired... These guys have a terrible sense of time, anyways. Lucky for them, so do I.

Caboose woke me up in the middle of the night. Blue base had a lack of rooms, and Tex requested to have a room to herself, so I was forced (more like preferred) to room with Caboose.

"My head hurts." He whimpered with those big, puppy dog eyes.

"Well," I sighed, looking at the the bags that were piled against the wall. Supposedly, one or two of them are mine, but I'm not to rummage through, "Did you happen to pack some aspirin for the trip here?" He tilted his head in an act of confusion, "Alright then, did I pack aspirin?"

"There was a white box that you put in the bag."

"Alright." I stood up, "Which bag is mine?"

He pointed to the two bags that were separated from the other two, "Those are yours..."

"Makes sense," I started to walk towards them, "They are a different color than the regulation blue ones." I sat down and started looking through them. I found the white box he was talking about, but it wasn't the one I was looking for. I opened it up to find so many pictures. It was strange, actually, but I got little bursts of memories from them. They all appeared to be as if I were the same age (20). What really caught me off guard was some of Project Freelancer.

"These were before we met." Caboose pointed at the image, "You said you had friends who liked to play dress up and pretend they were soldiers.

"I don't think I would've phrased it like that." I sighed, "They were real soldiers, just fighting for the wrong side."

"But that would mean you were a real soldier and then went through training again."

"I'm sure there had to have been a reason." I flipped through a few more pictures. Some were actually pretty hilarious, like me, Wash, and York pranking Maine... Damn, if I dare remembered that, I'd probably be scared, for Maine's expression showed so much anger. Suddenly, my head, too, began to hurt. I continued to look for aspirin. Dangit, I'd be scared if I had to wake anyone up. Finally, I found the pill bottle and handed it to Caboose, first.

"I don't need it anymore. My head feels better." He pushed the bottle back to me.

"... Was it just a migraine?" I asked, wondering how he could lose a headache as soon as I get one. It was as if my brain was being scanned, but that's not possible, right? Well, this is some time period where there's AI... wait a minute... AI, "Omega?" I whispered, quiet enough for Caboose not to hear. Suddenly, the ache left. Such a weird thing.

"You alright?" He gave me a concerned look.

"Yeah." I sighed and continued to look at the photos. There was strangely a few action shots of fighting some Insurrectionists. I actually look like I know what I'm doing. I guess my visits to the shooting range growing up weren't all for nothing. I scavenged through the bags once again to find pretty much clothes, souvenirs (necklace of hopefully baby shark teeth and not human canines... maybe there's a good reason for Tex to possibly think of me as a psycokiller), and a beaten up book titled _Inter-universal Transportation_. At least part of me actually wanted to go home, "Hey, Caboose? How about we go back to sleep?"

"Okay." He smiled and jumped into his bed, "Can you sing a song, first?" He begged with those god damn eyes.

"I don't know." I sat on my own bed, "I would rather not wake anyone up."

"Pleeease?" He pouted.

"Goddammit." I muttered under my breath, "Which song do you have in mind? We have to be quiet."

"The one that sounds real nice... but it's also sad."

"There's a lot of songs like that. Can you give me the tune?" I listened as he softly hummed the tune, "No... do you even know what that song's about?"

"Yeah."

"Fine." I took a soft inhale,"Turn away, if you could get me a drink of water 'cause my lips are chapped and faded. Call my aunt Marie. Help her gather all my things and bury me in all my favorite colors, my sisters and my brothers, still. I will not kiss you, 'cause the hardest part of this is leaving you." I tried to keep myself composed, for Caboose was still awake. Goddammit, I hate him for making me sing this, but he had to have heard it from me at some point, "Now turn away, 'cause I'm awful just to see 'cause all my hairs abandoned all my body, oh, my agony. Know that I will never marry, baby, I'm just soggy from the chemo, but counting down the days to go. It just ain't living, and I just hope you know that if you say goodbye today I'd ask you to be true 'cause the hardest part of this is leaving you." I lifted my head up to see Caboose fast asleep,"'Cause the hardest part of this... is leaving you."

* * *

><p>I woke up from a bit of a night terror. It wasn't as bad as I've had before, but it was enough for me to break into a cold sweat. I sat upright to see the room pretty much empty, aside of the furniture. I got out of bed and made my way to the kitchen. Damn, all that was there was a blender, a microwave, and a refrigerator. Nothing good to eat.<p>

"Hey, Baby. How'd ya sleep?" Tucker raised his mug to me from the table.

"Please don't call me that." I grabbed a tub of yogurt out of the fridge and sat at the chair across from him.

"Come on." He laughed, "If you'd just give me a chance-"

"I think I have." I started shoveling globs of pretty much fermented milk into my mouth with the cold, metal spoon.

He set his mug down onto the table, "I don't think you have."

"Trust me, I know you more than you know me."

"What is it about that? You seem to know a lot more about what's going on than the rest of us."

"Well, I wish it could be explained in only a few words." I sighed and stood up in attempt to eat the rest of my breakfast in peace.

"You know, I woke up to singing." He chuckled, "What was that about?"

"Caboose woke me up in the middle of the night and it was the only way to get him to fall back to sleep."

"That doesn't explain why you had to sing such a sad song."

"Just fuck off." I refused to face him, for tears brimmed my eyes.

"Can you tell me what's wrong, if you're so angry."

"I said fuck off." I made my way to my room, being sure not to turn away.

* * *

><p>Is it bad that I've been hoping for change since we have officially woken up? I mean, the day was actually pretty boring. I stood with Tucker and Caboose as Tex fixed the tank and Church possessed Lopez in hopes of warning Red Team.<p>

"Hey... Tex!" Caboose yelled, as expected, "Uh... Did you hear Church's secret plan to tell the reds that you were fixing the tank?"

I found that as a decent time to check on Church and turned on my radio, "Hey, Church?"

"¿Walker? ¡Ayudar! ¡Ellos son no escuchar porque soy hablo español!" (Walker? Help! They aren't listening to me because I'm speaking spanish) He ranted off.

I sighed, trying to process the given information, "Tú eres no muy inteligente." (You're not very intelligent)

"¿Tú habla español?" (You speak spanish?)

"Más o menos. No soy fluido." (More or less. I'm not fluent.)

"¡Luego ayundar! ¡Traducir para mí!" (Then help! Translate for me!)

"Siento. Tengo miedo de paradojas." (Sorry. I'm afraid of paradoxes.)

"¿Qué se supone que significa eso?" (What's that supposed to mean?)

"Yo diré después~" (I'll tell you later.) I practically sang as I hung up on him.

"Aw, crap." Tucker broke out, "Caboose, she's almost done fixing Sheila."

"I'm still here." I sighed, leaning against the wall of the cliff.

"I better radio Church and tell him what's going on."

"Oh, oh, oh, Tucker please," Caboose pleaded, "Tucker, Tucker, Tucker, Tucker, Tucker, please-"

"Yes, you can be the one who radios Church." He seemed somewhat irritated.

"Thanks man." He turned on his radio. I was prepared to mimic him word for word. Mimicry is the only thing keeping me entertained in this god-forsaken canyon, and I have my helmet on, so no harm no foul, "Calling Church. Come in Church. This is your close, personal friend, Private Caboose."

"Wait a minute." I mumbled under my breath, directing my attention to Caboose.

"Come in Private Church. Do you copy." Caboose continued, "Soldier unit Tex almost has the armor vehicle situation rectified. Okay. We require verification of your... mission... ness." He cleared his throat, "How is your progression?" He stood still for a moment and turned to face Tucker, "... He says he wants to talk to you."

'If O'Malley isn't in Caboose's head,' I thought to myself and looked around, 'then where the heck is he?' I pushed myself off the wall, allowing the dizzy spell (you know... the ones when you spring out of bed in the morning and feel as if you're gonna topple down) to pass, and walked up to the boys.

"Thank you for activating the M8O8V Main Battle Tank." Sheila spoke from the distance. Well, I've been saying that wrong... I thought it was M8O8 THE Main Battle Tank.

"Well, the tank's on." I huffed under my breath. I watched the tank as it made it's way towards Red Base, "Madre de dios." We watched in silence. Well, either that or I just wasn't paying attention to the boys. I couldn't help but think about O'Malley. Where the hell is he? Does he know more about me than I do... is he just hiding in Caboose's subconscious?

"Three points, you dirty whore!" I was knocked out of my trance, listening to the echoes as the tank exploded. I felt something of intense heat pressing against my neck. I slowly looked down to see my own hand. It wasn't quite choking me, but it was around my neck.

'Is he in my head?' I shuttered as I brought my arm to my side, 't-that can't be it. My neck does itch from a minor heat rash... maybe I was just scratching it while I wasn't paying attention. That has to be it, right? After all, I'm not quite used to this armor... It's easy for me to be convinced I don't have bulky, armored gloves on.'

"Crap." Tucker spoke up, "Church is gonna be pissed, and now he's got a body to kick our ass. Come on guys, let's get back to base."

"Alright!" Caboose and I said in synchronization, him in a cheerful and pleasant tone as I, on the other hand, seamed more concerned.

* * *

><p><strong>Song- Cancer by My Chemical Romance<strong>


	6. Multi-lingual

Whelp... Three months until season two officially begins. I was put in charge of fixing Church, since I was the only one who understood him. Yeah, not as great as you could imagine.

"Now," I sighed as I watched the switches and wires, "you know the drill. Whenever I tell you to, I just want you to count. Just a simple one, two, three. Got it?"

"¿Por qué?" (Why) He turned his head to face me.

"Because every language has a different counting system. For example, in danish it's en, to, tre, and german is ein, zwei, drei."

"Parece legitimo." (Seems legit).

"Alright then," I redirected a wire, "now?"

"Unos, dos, tres."

"Okay." I put the wire back and turned a knob, "How 'bout now?"

"Unos, dos, tres." He said in a more bored tone, "Tú sabe, yo no veo el punto en este." (You know, I don't see the point in this.)

"If you start speaking in... let's say arabic... then we know we're closer to English...now?"

"Ichi, ni, san."

"Well, now we got Japaneese. I swear, if it was this easy to change the speach module, how come the reds still haven't fixed Lopez? Now?"

"Yī, èr, sān."

"Chinese... Now?"

"Vous êtes une chienne." He spat out.

"No need to curse at me." I snapped at him, "At least we're in Europe... That's at least closer."

"Comment ça se fait que vous semblez reconnaître toutes ces langues?" (How come you seem to recognize all these languages?)

"Honey, I may not be fluent, but if you want me to give you an exorcism in latin, I will happily comply. Now."

"Look, can we just-" He stopped.

"Stop? Yeah. A month in the making, but welcome back to english. Hopefully we're in America instead of England, since it'd drive me crazy if you kept calling the elevator a lift." I put back the metal plates and things of the like where they belong, "Hey, can I tell you something?"

"What?" He stood up.

"In your... erm... crotch area... There's a switch. Don't ever flip it. It's worth regretting."

"How regretable is it?"

"Well, first you'll hear a constant beeping, then, once you fix it, you'll be paralyzed from the waist down."

"Well, you're the mechanic." He opened the door and walked out.

"I'm actually not!" I yelled after him, but he didn't listen. I turned to face my right shoulder and traced the stitches with my fingers. Darn thing itches, but I'm supposed to keep them in for a few more weeks. Reminds me of the stiches I got when I had my wisdom teeth taken out, except those disolved after some amount of time,

"Damn, I'm hungry." I sighed and made my way to the kitchen. I pulled the milk carton out of the fridge, "I still don't know where the hell O'Malley could be." I took a swig of the milk and spit it out, "WHOM EVER LEFT SPOILED MILK IN THE FRIDGE IS A FUCKING IDIOT!" I threw the carton in the sink.

"Wow. Lot of temper in such a small container." A deep, feminine voice went of.

"Who said that?" I muttered under my breath and looked around.

"Now, now. Get too curious and I pull out those stitches."

"You think you scare me?" I laughed under my breath, "Well, you're right, but fear is a great property of the human race."

"How so?"

"Fear gives a person adrenaline. They become stronger. They can run and think faster. Sure, fear can cloud a mind, but fear reminds someone that they want to live."

"According to your memories, you got that off of a TV episode."

"Omega?" I faced the floor, "How come I don't recognize your voice, then?"

"Such a dumb thought from such a smart girl. Take a guess."

I stood there for a moment, "No. If you get me thinking, there's probably a chance you'll take over."

"Well, there's a smart thought, but not the right answer." Silence, "You do realize I'm not Sigma, right?"

"And thank God for that. I'd go crazy with that ambitious soul in my head." I thought for a moment, and realization hit me, "You're using my voice, aren't you."

"Well, I'm still in your head; using your voice. As of now, you sound like a one way conversation." He laugh. A pair of feet stepped in front of me. I looked up to face a concerned looking Tucker. He was talking, but all I heard was silence, "Now, I promise to tell you all about who you are in this universe, but in exchange, you have to give me complete control."

"How about you let me sleep on it, you know... If I ever get to sleep again."

"Either you take the deal, or I take control by force."

"Or option C, get the hell out of my head and go possess Caboose, like you're supposed to." I watched as Tucker looked as if he started yelling, as if he thought I was in a trance. I'm in worse than a trance... I'm in hell as long as I'm in the presence of this AI of hate.

"Alright. I'll give you an hour." With that, hopefully he left.

"Just stop!" Tucker yelled.

"Wait. What...what happened?" I held my head.

"What do you mean what happened?! Threats and insults... And you think pretending to forget will fix everything?! Just get out of this canyon if you seriously don't like me that much!" He stormed out.

"Listen! Tucker!" I yelled after him, "Dammit, O'Malley."

"Oh, that's just the beginning." The AI just laughed.


	7. Just a Temporary Goodbye

Call me what you may, but an idiot I am not. O'Mally had threatened an hour. Surprising enough, he was patient and gave me a month. Of course, I've been stalling for time, and he's finally had it, but I've decided to let him have control, but in return, he had to give me enough time to get everything situated.

"I won't tell you anything until I have control." He huffed.

"Cresto?" I mumbled under my breath.

"What are you trying to do?"

"Well, exorcism won't work." I checked off my mental list.

"AI are not demons."

"Oh yeah? Well, I've obviously already learned that, smart alec." I started writing down on a piece of paper.

"Now, tell me what you are doing before I disembowl your friends with your own hands."

"You think I'm gonna explain it? You're linked to me thoughts. You tell me."

"I'd rather here you explain."

"Why? 'Cuz it's too much work and you got someone else to do it for you?"

"Actually, yes."

"Very subtle." I set down the pen and quietly read the letter to myself, "Tucker, listen. It's hard to explain, but please just don't tell Church or Caboose, and bear with me. I'm currently not in control of my body right now, and I want you to know that I honestly don't mean what I say. When Tex gets back, and trust me, she will, I want you to send me a distance from you guys so that I cannot hear your conversation. Good bye, and I sincerely hope that after this, we can sit down and talk. Michele Walker."

"You really think that's going to help you." He laughed at me.

"No, I don't, but the least I can do is try." I sighed and stood up, "And, you know what? I hope we get along, that way I won't feel responsible when the EMP goes off."

"What EMP?!" He almost snarled.

"Oh, I see." I smiled as I made my way to the door, "You have so much information available about your possible future, yet you're afraid to check it out. Your afraid to see yourself die, possibly in multiple scenarios where it's a suspected death, yet it's temporarily considered a death none the less."

"What are you babbling on about?"

I walked out the door and made my way to Tucker's room, "Babbling? I'm not babbling about anything."

"... Give me the letter." He demanded.

"No, I'm not giving you the letter."

"Give it to me right now!"

"When I'm in command of my body, you can't tell me what to do... And I'm going to assume you can't do much without my armor on, but I'm prepared to be proven wrong." I walked up to Tucker's door.

"If you don't give me that letter, I'll give you hell." He threatened.

"I said no." I slid the letter under the door, "And if you take over and make a ruckus, people will be aware of your existence."

"Bitch."

"Ass." I went back to my room, "Once I fall asleep, you're in control. Don't go killing us."

"Oh, please. If I kill you, no one would be able to tolerate me."

"I know your joking."

"Yes, the moment I get the chance, I'm going to mutilate you."

"Wow. My protector." I said in a sarcastic tone as I closed the door behind me and practically fell on my bed. I sat there for a moment, listening... for the first time in a long time, there was silence. Even in my sleep, for so long I have not experience something so quiet. Of course, it just means that O'Malley is preparing to take over, but I'll take it. I moved my hand to find the book _Inter-universal Transportation _at my fingertips, and that night, I read that book cover to cover before I fell asleep and ended my chapter of sanity.


	8. Too Used to Proper Treatment

"Alright O'Malley," I spoke from the corner of my own mind I had been trapped in, "You got what you wanted weeks ago. Give me your end of the bargain."

"You fool! I was lying." He laughed maniacally.

"Then I want my body back." I wobbled up, supporting myself with the walls around me.

"No can do."

I watched the outside world as a purple figure made it's way to the base, "Well, then. How about we change the deal up a bit. I know more about you than you know about yourself, so, if you tell me everything you know about me, we can just exchange knowledge."

"I enjoy the deal, but I'll have to think about that."

"Just so you know, my senior year of high school, they called me Cerbère."

"Where'd you go? Paris?" He spat out his words.

"As a matter of fact, yes." I sat back down, for my legs were about to give in, "It means Hellhound, although, google translate will tell you it means Cerberus, and when you back track it again, it'll give you a whole new word. It was a way to pretty much say if you fight me, I'll fight back harder. And in my sophomore and junior years, they called me tantibus, which is nightmare in Latin."

"Well, then. Not so great now that you're in such a weak state."

"It fit at the time." I sighed, leaning further against the wall, "I think someone called me a tæve in Greenland.

"Well, weren't you a pampered child."

"We had to move for dad's work every two or three years. I never got attached to anyone, and the only benefit of moving was learning a new language. First and second were in Germany. Third and fourth in China. Fifth and sixth in Mexico. Sixth, seventh, and eighth in Greenland. Tenth and eleventh in Italy. Twelfth in Paris. Finally, college in America!"

"Please tell me you're done talking. I don't think I can handle much more of your yammering."

I pouted, "Non devono essere un asino su di esso." (Don't have to be an ass about it).

"Please just shut up!" He snapped.

"What? Are you guys just gonna stay quiet?" Church's voice went off as he turned to face me (well, technically O'Malley), Tucker, and Caboose, "We're out here doing absolutely nothing, and none of you want to start a conversation." He turned to face me, "And you. Dammit, Walker, I couldn't get you to shut up and, and just a couple weeks ago, you went pitch quite."

"My apologies." O'Malley began to use my own voice, "I've had a lot on my mind recently." I watched as Tucker turned to face me, then divert his attention away.

"Excuse me." A wild DuFresne has appeared. Alright... so I didn't have any friends growing up. Don't make fun of me.

"Hello." Church turned to face the pacifist in purple armor, "Who're you?"

"My name's DuFresne... uh, are you Private Tucker?"

"No, I am not Private Tucker. My name is Church." He motioned to Tucker, "This is Private Tucker."

"Yo!" Tucker spoke up.

"And our friend over there in regulation blue? That's Caboose. And the girl over there is Walker."

"Please, just call me O'Malley." Once again, the Omega AI used my voice against me.

"You can't just change your name!" You tell me, Tucker!

"Yeah." Caboose jumped in, "If you change your name, then we won't know what to call you."

"You're as dumb as she says." O'Malley mumbled under his breath.

"What?" Tucker caught on.

"Nothing."

"... I received your call for a Medic." Doc continued.

"Medic... That was like three months ago." O'Malley pointed out.

"Yeah," Tucker continued, "what'd you do, crawl all the way here?"

"I came as quickly as I could." The purple medic made his excuses, "Where's the patient?"

"Well," Church started, "she's about fifty yards behind you,"

"and six feet below." O'Malley laughed.

Doc... or, I guess it's still just DuFresne at this point, turned to face the two tombstones behind him, "Oh." He turned back around, "I'm sorry about your loss."

"What- oh, yeah." Church didn't seemed to be fazed, "Yeah, thanks man, it was tough but, well, what're you gonna do..."

"We didn't like her very much." Caboose made his voice grow quieter, "She was mean to other people."

"I actually liked her." I mumbled, knowing only the AI would be the only one who could hear me.

"Quiet, you fool." O'Malley said as a response. Well, probably not said. He doesn't seem like one to blow his own cover, "I'm going to go." Now, he's actually using my voice. He turned around and made his way towards the base.

"And where do you think you're going?" Tucker grabbed my shoulder.

"You know. Probably going to write a book and consider your mutilation." He said through a wry grin, "You know, the usual."

"Come on, Tucker. You're probably the only one who can't fuck this up." I continued to watch the outside world, motionless.

"Walker... Er... O'Malley." Church spoke up, "Stay out here for a while. We're still keeping an eye on the Reds."

"Fine." The AI spat out the words, as if they were poisonous. Dammit. I hope Tex hurries up and get's here before my own soul deteriorates.

* * *

><p>"Ow! My foot!" O'Malley howled as he hid from the fire of the Red team behind a rock.<p>

"Your own damn fault." I laughed.

"Shouldn't you be in pain, too?!" He snarled.

I looked around the black and white room which is my head, "Nah. I feel fine." I guess pain goes straight to whomever's in charge of the body." I watched as Doc came running to help us, "Good luck dealing with this." I yawned.

"Oh no." He began to push me into the front of the brain, "You're dealing with this."

"Oh no you don't." I pushed back with my heels, "Lemme back in my corner!"

"No." He shoved me into consciousness and I grit my teeth at the sudden rush of pain.

"I'm here, Walker." The purple armored medic stepped in front of me, "Where're you hit?"

"L-left foot." I managed to whimper, "N-no offense, b-but you and I both know you have no clue as to what you're doing."

"And why do you say that?" He knelt down and examined the injury.

"Well, a medic just makes it more comfortable for the patient to die, as to a doctor, whom I'd actually feel more safe around, heals the wounds."

"Well, at least you know the difference." He held a bottle of aloe vera, who knows where he got it.

"There is no way you're rubbing that on my neck!" I lashed out. Can't help it. I got a bullet lodged into my cuneiform, "That is not a liable procedure to a bullet wound to the foot!"

"Alright... Anything else?"

"Pardon?"

"You have a bullet wound to the foot. Is there anything else wrong?"

"Well, I broke my ribs and took a bullet to the shoulder some time ago, if you can get the stitches out and check to see if the bones in my rib cage are properly aligned. That'd be fucking nice, even though I'm sure I have more medical experience."

"There's no need for sarcasm." He stood up.

"Sorry. I didn't realize that a bullet to the foot is not an excuse for being angry." I turned to face the rest of blue team's general direction, "YOU HAD TO SHOOT ME, CHURCH! YOU HAD TO SHOOT ME!"

"Come on. Let's get you up and get you with the rest of your team." He extended his hand.

"Don't you think you should be more concerned about removing the bullet from my Cuneiforms and the shrapnel from the Metatarsals." I took his hand and pushed myself off of the ground.

"I know what I'm doing." We walked over to the rest of blue team in silence... why do I anger everyone in this universe?!

"Chingado, no way." Church was talking to Tucker, "I'm not giving back my body. I just got this thing."

"Well, tell them he's gone." I shifted my weight to my right foot, one hand on Tucker's shoulder for support.

"That's actually not half bad of an idea." He turned to face the red team, "Uh, uh he's not here anymore!"

"Yeah, he left!" Tucker pitched in, "He was all like 'Sayonara!' and then he just took off."

"That's not spanish you idiot, that's french."

"Dude, you're both wrong. It's Japanese." I corrected them.

"Let's try this." Church glanced at Doc, "Hey Reds! How about a medic?! Would you take a medic as a hostage?!"

"A hostage?" Doc was confused, "But I'm supposed to go over there."

"Vous êtes tous des idiots." (You are all idiots.) I accidentally said aloud.

"And what's that supposed to mean?" Church caught on.

"Well, If you want to know, that is french." I said, sarcastically.

"Hey Doc." He turned to face the purple armored man, "How's the patient?"

"Doing well." Doc said in a fairly chipper tone, "She seems very alert and responsive."

"No I mean her toe. How's the toe I shot?"

"You didn't shoot her in the toe. The bullet wound in fairly close to the center of her foot."

"And yet, you still haven't gotten the bullet out, so either fix it before you're handed over to the other team, or give me some codeine so that I can get it over with myself." I said through grit teeth.

"Tell you what. Go ahead and send me over. I really don't think I can be anymore help."

"Do you hate me that much?!" I snapped.

"Alright," He pulled out tweezers, "I'll go over there after this."

"You've gotta be kidding me! Where's the numbing agent? Where's the pain relievers?"

"Well, sounds like someone thinks they're in regular civilization. Just go ahead and sit down."

"Um..." Church spoke up, then turned to face Red Team once again, "We can send him over in a bit. We actually need him for one more thing."

"You can't just back down on an offer!" Simmons argued.

"We have a soldier with a bullet lodged in her foot! Can you wait just a little longer?"

I turned to face Church, "Let's not forget who shot me here."

"Let's not forget the two that killed me with a tank." He snapped back

"Yeah, yeah." I waved dismissively, turned back around, and sat down, letting Doc painfully take any and all remains of metal in my damaged foot. Immediately after the pain became bearable, O'Malley took over once again, and put me in a weak state once more in the empty room of my head.


	9. Can't think of a chapter title

**So... No major changes, but I'm reposting this chapter since I changed my mind on a bit... Sorry if you like that part, but I didn't. Don't worry, I have something probably better in store.******

* * *

><p>"Hey Church" Tucker spoke up as O'Malley had us sat down, lying against the base wall, "If your body is the red team's old droid, and droids usually fix stuff, can't you just activate your repair sequence and fix Sheila?"<p>

"Huh... Well, yeah it's worth a shot, I guess." Church cleared his throat, "Alright. Stand back."

"Funny." I sighed, "Didn't realize how dumb the people I'm surrounded by are."

"It's actually surprising." O'Malley sighed, "I didn't think anyone could have as low of an IQ."

"Well, Project Freelancer did pull the Sim Soldiers from the dumbest of the schools... right?"

"Yeah." Silence, "If you know so many languages, which are you actually fluent in?"

"You never came off as one to actually care about others." I laughed.

"I would just like to know for when I plan for your demise." He noticeably lied. Damn... Am I rubbing off on him.

"Italian and French."

"Really, not English?"

"Yeah. Should've been obvious, since I have a bit of an accent with my words, and I fumble everyonce in a while." I spoke sheepishly, "Half the words I say, I don't quite understand, but I know what context to use them in. You get used to that whenever you have a short amount of time to learn a language... That's why math is the easiest class for me. There's little to no words, and the equations are universal." I started laughing, since I was watching Tucker and Church. Freaking hilarious, even if I've seen it before.

"Why only Italian and French?"

"Well, my mom's Italian and my dad's French. My mom had a business opportunity in France, so I learned French first. She said it was important for me to learn Italian so that I could talk to the rest of my family. My brother..." I forced myself to not choke up, "before I was born, my family was in Japan, so that's how I learned some of Japanese... enough to understand some animes."

"I guess that makes sense." Once again, nothing but silence.

"Do you hear something beeping?" Church asked Tucker.

"I told him not to." I sighed, "Stand up. He's going to want us on top of the base."

"As if he-"

"Hey Walker! Er... O'Malley." Church called, "How bout you go on top of the base and scout the Reds."

"I told you so." I huffed, "Off your ass."

* * *

><p>"There. You hear that?" Church continued to complain about the constant beeping.<p>

"Is it like a screaming, high pitched whistling noise, followed by a series of random clicks?" Tucker tried to help.

"No. It' sustain this constant 'beep beep beep' noise."

"Oh. Then, no. I don't hear anything."

"Do you eh, wait - do you actually hear a series of whistling noises followed by some random clicks?"

"No, I was just tryin' to be helpful."

"Well, you're failing." There were a few moments of silence, "Oh man, I can't take this anymore. Tucker, you're gonna have to do something, man, this beeping is going to drive me crazy."

I watched as the warthog, back at Red Base, started to make it's way over to us, "Oh, I remember this."

"What are you babbling about, now?" O'Malley muttered.

"Nothing... Is there any chance that I can have control once more?"

"Why the hell would I do that?!"

Caboose knelt down in front of Church, "I see a switch down here. It's not very big."

"I promise I'll let you have it back." I pleaded.

"Wait. Just stop." Church said as the vehicle behind him stopped.

"Fine. Make it quick." He nearly hissed as he gave me control once again.

"Caboose, do you even no how to work a switch?"

I stood up and stretched my arms, "Obviously, he doesn't..." Damn. How does O'Malley last with all these cramped muscles. There's a reason why mankind stretches. I made my way to Church, "Lemme have a look at it."

"You aren't...um... Concerned with the placement of it?" Tucker asked.

"Well, thinking rationally, it's not a human body. It's a freaking robot with not much similar anatomy." I sat down, following the green wire, "Now, this is going to seem silly, but I want you to say the words 'Go home.'"

"Why would I tell you to go home?" Church huffed as the warthog made its way back to red base.

"You know what, nevermind. Just shut up for a moment while I figure this out." I sighed, "Dove diavolo fa il filo verde va." (Where the hell does the green wire go.)

"What did you say?"

"Nothing." I sighed, "I have no clue where the green wire goes, but the red one leads directly to the switch... Problem is that-"

"Can't you just flip the switch?"

"The switch is broken." I followed a dark grey wire.

"Then take out the red one."

I flinched, "Say Abort! Say Abort!"

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

I sighed, "Well, for that, I might as well take out the red wire." I traced the red wire one again, yanking it out of it's place.

"Oh God yes, finally! Some freakin' peace and quiet! I thought that was gonna drive me nuts! ...Hey. Why can't I move my legs?"

I looked back up at the blue leader, "Happy now, Senpai?"

"This is great, this is just great. Thanks a lot O'Malley. Now what'm, I supposed to do: my lower half is damaged." He seemed mad.

"Well, first you can refer to me as Walker, and -"

"Make up your mind!"

"I'll explain another time... Second, I warned you about this what... A month or two ago?"

"Why don't you try walking it off?" Caboose suggested.

"I can't use my legs moron." You could see Church's anger through his helmet.

"Oh, I see... Have you tried running?"

"Well," I stood up, popping my shoulder along the way, "Red team's on ther way, so how about we turn you around so that they don't find you as rude as you really are."

"No they're not." Tucker pointed out, watching Red base as Doc stepped out of the warthog.

"Tucker, shut up and trust me on this." I made my way to the edge of the base the Reds would show up at and sat down.

"Says the one who claims Tex will come back."

"Shut up." I hissed.

"Wait." Church caught on, "You think Tex is coming back?"

"Well, why not? You and her are one of the same." I tried to fix everything.

"What do you mean by one of the same?"

"Well, she's dead, and she might come back." I'm not necessarily lying, right?

"I guess it makes sense."

I gazed off into the distance humming the Turret Opera for Portal 2 over and over again, seriously, I had no friends, so I coped with video games.

"The hell are you doing?" O'Malley huffed, "Give me my body back."

"If I remember correctly, this is my body. You are just like a split personality. I didn't start off with you, but I hope I don't end with you."

"Are you so sure that's how a split personality works?"

"No." I responded, bluntly.

"Then give me back my body." He growled.

"Not until you explain what everything you know about me." I snarled.

"Hey, blues!" Simmons spoke up, "We're here to give you back the prisoner!"

I turned around to face the guys, who, thank god, weren't doing anything weird, as Church was facing the proper direction. I turned to face the Reds, "What are you're terms?"

"What terms?" Church asked me, "Why do you want to give him back?"

"We don't want him!" Grif yelled.

"We can't give you another prisoner! That was our last one!"

I turned to face Church once again, "Now wait. Don't be irrational about this." I faced the Reds again, "We'll take him back-"

"We'll what?!" Tucker seemed confused.

"..." I sighed, "We'll take him back, but on one condition." I felt a grin wipe across my face, but that was probably because of O'Malley.

"What condition?! We're returning the prisoner!"

"Well, we don't want him back!" Tucker shouted. Dammit! I thought I had this all figured out.

"Fine, but don't come asking for him back later." Simmons turned to make his way to Red Base.

"We won't!" Tucker yelled after them.

"Last chance." Grif pried.

"Beat it, Reds!" Church shouted.

"Alright, we're goin', we're goin'." And with that, they left.

"Can I have my body back?" O'Malley spoke up once again.

"You know, you're very impatient." I sighed, "Go ahead, but you still have to tell me everything about myself."

"Fine." He nearly snarled out, and he went ahead and took over, this time, rendering my consciousness into an senseless state.


	10. Lessons of the Past

According to Inter-_Universal Transportation,_ those who have had a near death experience are able to get special abilities. Schnider, the author of the book, claims that there is only one Grim Reaper. He can travel through dimensional planes as he harvests the souls of the dying. For those who defeat death himself, they sometimes get a reward. Currently, the most common one is to travel across the same planes as Grim. Of course, though, that story is fiction. Right?

**Many Years Ago, Location Unknown**

I woke up who knows where. Cold metal was pressed against my arms and legs. I sat up, looking down at my clothes. Shorts and a tank top; my usual night clothes. Question was, why am I not in bed. Hello? Why am I not in the same climate? The air was thick, compared to the usual thin air I've spent the past two years in.

"Dove sono?" (Where am I?) I muttered as I slowly stood on my feet. I looked around, taking in my surroundings as a dizzy spell came upon me. I took note of a poster on the wall next to me, "Huh?... 'Not putting enough con...contra... contribution into the human race? Join the military today and fight for your people!" I blinked for a minute, "Hey, those guys look like the spartan soldiers in... ha...lo." I looked around again, noticing the high tech setting, "Shit... This has to be a prank."

I walked the empty streets for a while, constantly getting glares shot at me. I must stand out like a sore thumb, "Dammit." I quietly yelped as a stepped on something sharp, "Ah, that's right... no shoes. Just my luck." I sat down and began to pull the huge shard of metal out of my foot as I grit my teeth, "Damn. It's really stuck in there." I winced.

"You alright?" A man with blonde hair and a grey shirt walked up to me. Such a familiar voice, but unrecognizable face.

"Um..." I looked down at my foot again, "Yeah?"

"You sure?" He laughed quietly, "You don't need help to the hospital or anything, do you?"

"I think I can get it out myself." I looked back up at him, "Um... where on Earth am I?"

"Well," He laughed, "not Earth, I can tell you that. You sure you don't need to go to the hospital?"

I stared at him for a minute, trying to process the information, "No... I don't think they'll... take my... insurance."

"Alright." He knelt down and took a look at the injury, "You do know how dangerous it is to walk with out shoes, right?"

"I'm sorry." I said with not nearly enough sarcasm in my tone, "Back at home, you can walk outside and not really have to worry about anything, unless someone hold a gun up to your head."

"So, if you're home is somewhere else, are you here to enlist?"

"Enlist? Enlist in what?"

"Well, if you don't know, never mind."

"Alright." I managed to pull the metal out of my heal.

"So, what's your name?"

"Michele. You?"

"It's David." He smiled.

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day, Blood Gulch Outpost Alpha<strong>

"Where are we?" I heard Church.

"We're inside Michele's mind." A female voice went off.

"So, that's her first name?" He paused, "This is more roomy than I imagined."

"Well, she's not an idiot." Was that... Tex?

"Uung." I sat up, taking notice of a throbbing pain in my head.

"Quiet, you fool." O'Malley hissed as he began to load a gun.

"What happened?" I sat up, remembering the dream and looking down at my foot.

"It was a memory. You were remembering your first moments in this universe." He cocked the rifle, "David was the first person you've met here. You later enlisted in Freelancer, thinking this was all a dream. Really, if you had a chunk of metal painfully wedged into your foot, that should be an indicator of reality."

"And how do you know this?" I wobbled to a standing position.

"It's just taking you longer to remember this time, but you will soon." He walked off.

"The hell was that?" I murmured.

"Is everyone here an idiot?!" I heard Church yell.

"Keep it down." Tex mumbled, telling me that they're close by. Behind the wall? I looked over the edge and saw them. It's strange. A part of me doesn't want O'Malley to leave. Damn. Omega had to be my favorite AI, hadn't he, "You hear that?" Their footsteps stopped.

I turned the corner, "So, how've you guys been." I gave a wry grin.

"Well, the image of everyone else is an idiot, and the image of herself is evil." Church stomped his foot.

"You're lucky I'm forgiving." I sighed.

"Yeah, that's her." Tex commented as she looked around.

"Where are we?" Church asked.

"I looked around, surprised to not be seeing black and white walls, "Looks like Valhalla."

"Like the vikings version of heaven, Valhalla?"

"No, like the outpost that Omega..." I shut my mouth, realizing I'm talking to a character instead of a friend. I noticed as Tex shot a glare at me.

"What's that all about?"

"Nothing." I said quickly as I had just noticed one of my memories of Church getting launched from the launch pad thingy in the background, "How 'bout you hurry up, get rid of O'Malley, and get out of my head."

"How do you know that we're here for O'Malley?" He gave off an almost menacing glare.

"Listen, I know a lot of things, and it's very possible that Text knows too, but I'd just really prefer if you'd hurry up and get out of my head."

Tex gave me a nod and said a simple, "Let's go get this over with." As Church and I followed her.

It wasn't until a memory of Epsilon got shot and yelled something about Omega not grasping the concept of an AI (which thank god Church didn't hear) that we had finally found O'Malley, and with his disappearance, so did a part of me die. Surely, I will see him again, for as long as he's with Doc, but that is until the Meta takes him. Once he was gone, I was in control once again. I stood up and immediately drew my attention to the cave that I know O'Malley will be in now, and if he's not there yet, then soon.

"You're not dead!" Caboose cheered.

I sat up and looked at him for a moment, "Y-yeah." I looked around for a moment, "So, right now, Lopez and Tucker are at red base, right?"

"Yup!" He cheered. Thank God for idiocracy.

"Alright." I grunted as I stood up, "They'll be back in a bit. I got to prepare an explanation." I started to make my way to the base.

"You seem mad." He followed me.

"Well, I just had an AI stuck in my head since Tex 'died.' How do you think I feel?"

"I thought you would've been happy to see O'Malley again."

I stopped in my tracks, "Again?"

"Yeah. Back at training, you'd tell me stories, and I'd listen, and sometimes I wouldn't understand them, but you'd keep talking and it made you happy to talk to me, and I like to listen, so I didn't stop you."

"If that's the case," I turned to face him "then remind me, what did I tell you?"

"You said something about him being your AI, and that you were able to suppress some of his hate, but you gave him to someone named Texas because you knew there was no way he could fall into the wrong hands."

"Yeah, that sounds like me." I sighed and continued to go toward the base, "Any chance you can remind me on any other stories I may have told you?"

"Will do!" He cheered as he skipped toward the base himself. Maybe now can I actually learn about my life in this universe.


	11. Another Chapter

"What if Grim's intent wasn't just to harvest souls?" Goes _Inter-Universal Transportation_, "What if his intent is to find the strong. What if he tries to find the one who could defeat him in the end. What if he's trying to find someone who's meant to die many times, but yet ends up living anyway? Maybe, just maybe, he's looking for that one perfect organism that can only come once in his lifetime? Perhaps that's where the idea a zombies come from, for they still live, even after decomposition has begun."

* * *

><p><strong>Many Years Ago, Mother of Invention<strong>

"This shit's real." I mumbled as I had become frozen from the paint thing. What's it called, again? Lockdown Paint? Hell, I don't even know anymore, but it stings like a bitch. Who am I fighting again? Frickin' Carolina and Florida in a 2v2 with Wash.

"Point Carolina and Florida." F.I.L.L.S.'s voice echoed through the room as the paint wore off.

"Well, that's a relief." I stretched my arm.

"Better take cover." Wash ran past me, obviously afraid.

"Yeah, yeah." I said, sarcastically, "All I want now is a win. The only gun training I've had is at a shooting range. Those targets don't move."

"Round begin." F.I.L.L.S. said once again.

"Well, shit." I ran to take cover behind a pillar.

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day, Blood Gulch Out Post Alpha<strong>

_Bang, bang, bang._

"Man, you're really good with a gun." Tucker commented me on my marksmanship toward the leftover beer cans that had been lying around base.

"Yeah, but I can't really calculate to trajectory well toward a moving target." I reloaded the gun, "Although, I have shot a rat when I was home alone and somehow managed to not damage the wall or floor. That was my greatest accomplishment at age fifteen."

"Age fifteen?! What kinda drugged up parents did you have?"

"Ones that were concerned about my safety. I've live in many countries, a lot of them full of crime. I needed to be able to defend myself." I fired a few more times.

"Well, you and a pistol is a whole lot better than Church with a sniper rifle."

"Yeah. He's never hit his mark," I laughed, "Unless you count Deja View."

"Deja what?"

"Never mind." There was silence for a minute, and all you could hear were the shots being fired.

"You know, you still need to explain."

"Explain what?"

"You know, possession, knowing Tex would be back, that fact that you promised you'd explain in that letter."

"Hey, if anything, be happy I didn't write that letter in Italian. I had to grab a dictionary for that thing."

"It was a simple-written letter." He said as looked down at my feet, "You don't know english, do you?"

"I-I'm just not fluent... I'm, I'm able to put words into context, but I don't know some meanings."

"That would explain that sexy accent."

"Please just don't start." I pointed to gun toward his face, "Remember who's the one holding a pistol here."

"Alright, alright." He held his hands up in surrender, "Although, I know you wouldn't dare."

I giggled, "I guess you've already figured me out." I dropped the gun to my side, "How?"

"Caboose. He just doesn't shut up, and when he started talking about you, I couldn't resist."

"If that's the case, what did he say?"

"Something about your friends in Freelancer and how you were forced from some phenomena to not continue college."

"Saddest thing about that is I had tests the next day... Oh, God one of those is a playing test. My embouchure's gonna wear off."

"Playing test? I can give you a playing test." He gave off a wry grin.

"Hell no. I ment in band. I was in college for my music major and bachelors in forensics."

"Forensics? So in a way, you were mean to crime fight."

"Crime fight?"

"Well, right now, the Reds are the enemy. That's kinda like fighting crime, right?"

"Ya, unless Red is somehow blue."

"I keep getting the vibe that you know more than us."

"Is it that obvious?" Dang. I need to tone down my sarcasm.

"Yeah, explain."

"Well, have you ever read _Inter-Univeral Transportation _by Doctor Arnold Schnider?"

"No."

"Well," I let out a sigh, "It's a good book. If you can find an English copy, I could better explain it."

"So, you're trying to change the topic?"

"No, no, no, no. The book is actually relevent."

"Well, what's it about."

"It's about the theory that man can jump between universes. For example, you turn right on a road, but you jump you a parallel universe and see everything that would've happened if you turned left."

"Sounds fake." He laughed.

"Yeah. I thought so too." I mumbled, "I'm going to go back inside. I still have a headache from O'Malley." I lied and made my way to the base.

"Alright, but you have to quit avoiding the topic!" He yelled after me. Upon entry of the base, I was tackled by a Caboose as I began to take my armor off.

"Walker! Walker! Walker!" He cheered as he had his arms wrapped around my neck.

It took me a moment before I said anything, "I can't tell if you're saying Walker, as in my name, or waka, the sound Pacman makes."

"I'm saying Walker. You'd know if I was saying waka, since they sound nothing alike! Walker. Waka... Oh, I see what you mean now." He let go of me.

"So, what do you want?" I remained patient with him.

"Guess what I found!" He was getting really peppy now.

"What did you-"

"There's a room here in the base with a piano in it!"

"Why does that concern me?"

"I was actually wondering..." He looked down at the floor and moved his foot in circles, "I was wondering if you'd like to play a song." He looked up at me with those big, childish eyes.

"Honey," I rest my hand on his shoulder, "I hate to disappoint you, but I can tell a B flat from a C sharp on that thing."

"But... you always played... back during training." Tears began to well up in his eyes.

"Dammit." I said, breathlessly, "If you really want me to, but don't complain if it sounds terrible."

He pretty much sprinted for the mentioned room. It was a struggle to stay caught up with him, but what's the point in crushing his happiness? When we finally made it to the room, he sat on the ground, pointed at a keyboard, and looked at me with an ear to ear grin.

"Dammit." I sighed, knowing that disappointing him would probably haunt me for years to come. Here goes nothing. I played an E minor chord then glanced at him. I played Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, and to my surprise, his facial expression sunk.

"Seriously man, I'm sorry." I spoke from the cruel silence, "I don't know a lick of piano... er keyboard." As I said that, my right hand was doing its own thing, as I played multiple chords until the tune sounded familiar. I quickly took my hand off, for I was playing 100 Tex Battle (if that's actually what it's called).

"Sounds like you can play." He pouted, "I thought you promised you'd never lie to me again."

"Listen, Caboose, I... wait. Again?" Man. This guy is a mystery, wrapped in an enigma, wrapped in a suit of armor.

"Yeah." He looked down toward his feet, "You promised."

"Caboose." I stood up and sat down in front of him, placing a hand on his, "I'm sorry. I-I can't really say I'm how you remember me... and it must be hard for you, since you can't even tell who you are without your current helmet."

"Yeah." He stood up, "I-I'm just going to take a nap."

I watched as he began to walk away, "Wait, Caboose." I stood up.

"Yeah?" He turned around, obviously on the verge of tears.

"Dammit." I pulled him into a hug. Now I'm on the verge of crying, "I'm sorry. I won't do it again." He stayed still for a bit, motionless, probably not able to process the given information, "Sorry." I pushed away from him, "That's a little unlike me, isn't it?"

"A little." He mumbled, "I-I'm really tired. I'm just gonna," He pointed at the door, "I'm just gonna go take a nap." He left the room.

I walked back to the keyboard, and rest my forehead on the keys, causing a not so harmonious sound to echo through the room, "Stultus." (Idiot[Latin]) I said through a thin stream of air.

* * *

><p><strong>Alright. This is mostly a filler, but it does get mentioned later in the story... I have a new format with writing languages (meaning[Language]). I just find it easier. If there's no [ ] brackets, assume it's the same language as the one most recently mentioned. If it's not, though, let me know. I am monoligual, so any mistakes I make language-wise, don't be afraid to let me know. :)<strong>


	12. Agent New Hampshire

**Many Years Ago, M.O.I.**

"Director?" I walked up to the said man.

"Yes, Agent New Hampshire?" He turned to face me.

I ended up with a lump in my throat, "I-I was just wondering if you knew whether or not the book _Inter-Universal Transportation _is fictional."

He sighed, seemingly more calm than in actual episodes, "I cannot say I have heard of the book."

"Well, I looked down at the book in my hands, "I'd lend you my copy, if it weren't in French."

"Then, explain what it's about?" He pretended to be interested, but I was still able to see through his facade.

"Well, it's the theory that a person could travel from one universe to the next. It talks about how there is only one Grim Reaper that travels through dimensions to harvest souls of the meant to be dead, and he sometimes rewards those who defeat him."

"Sounds fictitious. It's either written by someone who belongs in an insane asylum, or with a vivid imagination." He turned to face the console, obviously uninterested.

"Well, either way, it's pretty interesting." I opened the book and fumbled through the pages, "This is roughly translated, but, 'What if Grim's intent wasn't just to harvest souls? What if his intent is to find the strong. What if he tries to find the one who could defeat him in the end. What if he's trying to find someone who's meant to die many times, but yet ends up living anyway? Maybe, just maybe, he's looking for that one perfect organism that can only come once in his lifetime?" He was quiet for a moment, "Excuse me?"

He looked at me over his shoulder, "I may end up looking into that, after all, and I will determine whether or not it is the truth."

"Alright, Sir." A saluted.

"Dismissed."

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day, Blood Gulch Outpost Alpha<strong>

I woke up sprawled onto the floor of the piano room, "I must've dozed off." I rubbed my eyes and let out a loud yawn, "Serves me right for not getting enough sleep." I sat up, remembering the dream, "New Hampshire, huh? Would be cute if it didn't sound like hamster." I stood up and adjusted my crop top, "Well, Omega said that this has happened before, so question now is what will I remember." I made my way, in a sluggish manner, to where I had left my armor (by the front door), dwelling on the thought. Unfortunately, Tucker had been there, waiting.

"Wow." He grinned, holding his helmet to his side.

"You know, I'm really not in the mood to deal with your shenanigans right now." I said as I sat down by my pile of useless armor. Seriously... Why do we have these things if they don't prevent wounds?

"Sorry." He laughed, "I don't want to make you uncomfortable."

"Kinda late for that, don't you think?" I stretched out my arms, attempting to pop my shoulder into place.

"Nice tattoo."

"I don't have a tattoo. They are a cause of hepatitis." I traced the stitches on my left foot as I reached for a boot.

"I'm looking at it right now."

I shot my head up and looked at him over my shoulder, "Where is it?"

"Lower back. It's not exactly on your spine. Just a little to the left."

"Well," I huffed, "What does it look like?"

"It looks kinda like the outline to something... then there's two bars connected by an arc."

"You are absolutely no help."

"There's also something that says 'New Hampshire, Subject Zero.'"

"Then maybe the outline is of New Hampshire. I'll ask Tex about it. It's probably from Freelancer... Wait," I allowed my voice to grow quiet as I reached for the chest plate, "Subject Zero?"

"Well, if you want to ask Tex about it, why don't we get a Ouija board?"

"I hope you're joking."

"Relax. I'm not being serious."

"Good." I sighed, locking the last piece of armor into position.

"Do you-"

"Not really." I stood up.

"You don't even know what I was going to say!"

"Knowing you, I do." I laughed. And with that, I carried out my patrol duties so that I wouldn't end up hearing about it later. Been there, done that.


	13. I Can Haz Redemption?

**Many Years Ago, M.O.I.**

"Agent New Hampshire." A medic stopped my right in front of my corridor, "We're going to need you to take these medications."

"Medications?" I laughed under my breath, "For a sprained wrist? Isn't that just a little over the top?"

"Director's orders." He handed me the amber colored bottle.

"You know about my lack of trust for the Director, right?" I took the bottle and read the label.

"Just sit back and relax. It will get better over time."

"Sit back and relax?" I quietly scoffed, "I watched Maine get shot in the throat, only making it out of there with a sprained wrist, and you want me to relax? I tried to stop him from getting hurt."

"Like I said, calm down. The medicine should be able to help that."

I opened the bottle and looked at the brightly colored pills, "Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah?"

"What the hell are these?" I held the still open bottle in front of him.

"Medications." He said almost monotonically.

"I've never seen neon colored pills before." I shook the bottle, not allowing the contents to fall out.

"That is flavoring."

"It's glowing."

"Just... get with the twenty-sixth century. Take them twice a day, after breakfast and dinner, until the bottles empty. Afterwards, we'll decide whether or not to refill your prescription." And with that he left.

I picked up a pill, examined it, but swallowed it anyway, "It tastes like really shitty fruit." I sighed, "I've spent almost three years in this program for unnecessary meds?" I turned to face the door of my room, "It better be pretty worth it later."

**Present Day, Blood Gulch Outpost Alpha**

I knocked a few times on the regulation blue painted door, waiting for a sound, "Caboose?" I said after no sound was heard, "You in there, buddy?" Silence, "Listen, I just want to talk. If we're done, and you want me to leave, I'll humbly comply." I waited for a few minutes before he opened the door. He didn't look like he had bee crying or anything (what a relief), but he had that sad look in his eyes. He invited me in and we sat down on his bed, and I watched him look at me as I tried to formulate the words I wanted to use, "Listen, I-"

"It's alright." He ducked his head down, "You don't need to apologize. I'm just an idiot."

"You are not an idiot." I lightly grabbed him by the wrist, forcing him to look at me, "We all have our moments of idiocracy, but that does not make us dumb. If anyone of us is the idiot, it's me. I made a promise and I broke it."

"But... you have anemia... You didn't remember the promise."

"Sweety, it's still amnesia. Anemia is an issue with the blood."

"Yeah, that." His voice grew quieter. Damn... I've really made him upset.

"Listen. You may not think the same, but you're my best friend. I think of you like you think of Church... saying that you don't think of him exactly like fan fictions are written."

"What's a fan fiction?"

"I'll explain it to you another time. The point is that I really care about you, and if you're ever feeling sad, you can come talk to me." I waited for a response, but he just stared at me. I ducked my head down, just a little slightly, then I felt a warm, not so strangling as I expected, embrace. It was actually quite comforting.

* * *

><p><strong>Many Years Ago,M.O.I.<strong>

"There's an alien inside of me." I grunted as I held my stomach in the middle of the training room. I just suddenly felt like my stomach was being slowly and methodically torn apart as I was just about to fire a round of lock-down paint.

Wash walked up to me, "Need a medic?" He knelt down.

"I sure hope you don't ask that to the enemy." I curled up on myself.

"I'm being serious... and, how dumb do you take me for?"

"Very." I wheezed.

"How the hell can you make sarcastic comments now? There's a chance you could die."

"It's in my genetics... and no one's died from a stomach ache... as far as I know." I watched as two doctors came running in with a stretcher. Suddenly, I was just out of it.


	14. More Like Agent New Hamster

**Many Years Ago, M.O.I.**

Is it considered bad that I've always liked the medical bay? The beds are more comfortable, anything like Advil or Imodium is easily accessible, and not just anyone can barge in ("Dammit, Wash!" "I'm sorry! I thought you were decent!"). The silence, though, could be enough to drive one insane, but that's already gone for me.

"Alright there, Michele." One of the doctors came in, "Is there any chance that you could come in here for something that isn't medical?"

"I did once, didn't I?" I laughed, still holding my stomach as I wait for the codeine to kick in.

"You wanted to see York's surgery. You wondered how an operation to an eye took place."

"Sorry Lazerus."

"Now, in regard to your stomach pain," He held up something kinda like a X-ray, "I can honestly say I haven't seen this before, and I've seen a lot."

"And that is?"

"Well," He looked over the film, "Your entire genetic makeup is changing... only problem is that this is usually found in lab rats. Are there any strange medications you're taking... Or anything of the like?"

"I just finished an amber bottle of drugs one of you guys gave me today, if that counts?"

He flipped through my medical file, "There's no prescription drugs listed here."

"So-"

"So, you've been taking drugs that turned you into Agent New Hamster! You've never taken drugs without knowing what in them before. I tried to give you Ibuprofen once and you asked at least ten times what it was before you took it."

"I did ask about it." I pouted, "Then he told me, 'Get with the twenty-sixth century.'"

"Speaking of which, how's getting back home working out for you?"

"Still little to no leads." I sighed, resting my head on the wall, "I've read that _Inter-Universal Transportation _book you've suggested, but it doesn't make complete sense."

"Well, if you find a way, let me know. A lot of my research has been towards that book." He wrote something down, "I want to go home too. I think I've seen enough blood shed for once." He looked down at me, "Especially from you. Good God how can someone get so many bullet wounds in one mission."

"Easy. You just stand there."

"You're lucky your not dead."

"I am invincible!" I cheered.

"No one is invincible, unfortunately." He wrote one last thing down and closed the file, "Another unfortunate, you just finished that medicine you were given, so now I can't examine it and find exactly what's happening."

"Sorry?"

"You should be." He set my file down on the desk next to me, "Could you probably at least try to describe them." He leaned up against the wall.

"Um... Neon color, taste of probably rotten fruit,... glowing."

"Glowing... and you took them anyways?"

"I don't know. This is about... five centuries ahead of my time frame. The fact that they had flavoring, shitty as it was, isn't close to what I'm used to."

"The flavoring part was probably a lie." He sighed, pressing his fingers against the bridge of his nose.

"Was it?" My face sunk a bit, "There's something to not look forward to."

"And these pills, were they neon colored because they were in a plastic casing?"

"No. It was the actual color of it."

"So, not only did you take them, but I'm sure you had a good look at them and saw that they were glowing... and brightly colored without a case?"

"Yeah, now that you... mention it..." My words trailed off.

I smacked me on the back of the head, "Be smart."

"I-I don't speak a da english very goodly." I defended, holding onto my head.

"You've been speaking English for a little more than five years, according to your story. I don't think you can use that excuse anymore."

"Sorry." I sighed.

"You know what, just rest. I'll draw some blood and check out your DNA and identify what's going on."

"Alright." I sighed, extending my arm.

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day, Blood Gulch Outpost Alpha<strong>

"Why do you want me to look at a tattoo on your back?" Tex spoke, nearly monotonically.

"I just... I think it may be from Freelancer... since supposedly I was in that." I took off my chest plate, "I just... need to know. So could you please explain it for me?"

"Well, for starters, Freelancers didn't get tattoos, unless they did it on their own leisure." She crossed her ghostly arms, for she still didn't have a body (Donut is held captive here at base, so we're one step away from being hurt physically once again).

"So, I probably got whatever is on my back during off time... or whatever it's called."

"Most likely." She watched as I resorted into a face of disappointment, "If you want, I could have a look at it. If you really have amnesia, then I'm sure you'd like to know."

"Alright." I turned around allowing her to examine the markings on my back. If anything bothered me, it was the silence, "Why are you being quiet?" I looked over my shoulder, "Is it bad?"

"Well," She sighed, "Do you want the truth, or something along the border of that?"

"It's bad isn't it?"

"That's saying you want the truth."

"..." I stared at her, trying to see through her blank expression, "Truth?"

"Well, you're the lucky one who got Subject Zero. The Director somehow got it in his mind to make the perfect organism."

"Uh..." I managed to say, remembering one of my memory dreams.

"So, he gave you medicine that adjusted your genetic code."

"Yeah... that sounds... about right..."

"Can I finish?"

"...I'm sorry."

"So, what this genetic adjustment did was it made it so you can't die. Still get wounds, but you can't die from them."

"Actually," I turned around in order to face Texas in a way so that I couldn't hurt my neck, "how do you know this?"

"O'Malley spoke pretty fondly of you."

"..."

"Now, can I get to explaining?"

"Yes, please." I said in a low voice.

"Now, this explains the amnesia. Every time you die, you think you've just gone to bed at night years ago, and a vague remembrance of however you 'died.'"

"..."

"I'm done."

"Alright... Lemme just... process the information." I sighed, pressing my thumb against the left side of my lower back.

"Take your time."

"So..." I pointed my index finger toward the ceiling, "I can't die, but in exchange, I temporarily forget my time with anything, such as Freelancer?"

"Just about. The Director didn't really consider the downsides, since he first tested it out on rats. He only focused on the positives."

I looked down at my hands, "When was it found out that I end up losing memories?"

"When we went to kill C.T. and recover her armor, you were killed in action by a gunner. We carried your body back to the Mother Of Invention, one of the doctors removed the bullets, then reported that you came back to life, not remembering who he was. It took you about a week to remember everything."

"Was this doctor... was his name Lazerus?"

"So, you are starting to remember pieces."

"Not quite in consciousness... except for the last one."

"What was the last one about?" She raised her eyebrow.

"Well, mostly talking to Lazerus. It was... um..." I snapped my fingers a few times, "Before Alpha fragmented... after Maine got shot in the throat."

"That sounds about right."

"Yeah." I looked toward the ground.

"I asked whether or not you wanted the truth." She shrugged.

"Yeah. I'm glad you told me the truth." I stretched my arms, "It's good to know these things, good or bad. At least I know more about myself than I did five minutes ago." I picked up the chest piece and held it at my side, "Well, thanks." I nodded my head and took a few steps.

"Any time." She waved as I exited the room.


	15. Gelatinous Structure

**Many Years Ago, Mother of Invention: Medical Bay,**

"This is actually really strange." Lazerus said as he turned away from his microscope.

"What's strange?" I sighed, honestly afraid to hear an answer.

"You remember that blood sample I took from you?"

"About seven minutes ago? Yeah, I remember."

"Well, take a look." He took a blank slide, put a bulbous drop of blood on it, then handed it to me, "You gotta give it some time."

I looked at it for a moment, "I don't see anything."

"You're so impatient." He stood up, "Just give it about two minutes."

"You couldn't have prepped it earlier so that I don't have to wait two minutes?" I stared at the slide, being sure not to spill the drop.

"I didn't know in time to prep it from you. Welcome to actual science, instead of the class labs." We waited the rest of the time in silence, "Alright, take a look."

I took another look at it,"It's a drop of blood."

"Just poke it."

"Fine." I said as I poked the sample of blood, expecting it to splatter all over the slide. To my surprised, it just turned back to it's original shape. I looked at my finger, and there was barely even a trace of blood.

"You see what I mean? Strange, right?"

"I don't get it." I mumbled, a little fascinated by the sample.

"Within just a few minutes of exposure to air, your blood turns into a gelatinous structure." He sat back down, looking into the microscope, "It's pretty interesting, actually. It's like a natural biofoam, in its own way."

"That is pretty interesting." I turned the slide upside down, watching as it stuck to the surface.

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day, Blood Gulch Outpost Alpha,<strong>

"Hey, Tex?" I approached probably the most fearsome Freelancer once again, knowing Church, Tucker, and Caboose were trading Donut for robot shells ("Walker, keep an eye on Lopez and Sheila." "Sí señor").

"Aren't you supposed to be doing something?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah," I shrugged, "but if they survived the threats of the robot army and the wrath of O'Malley in my memory, then having them live it would be fine." I managed to say in one breath.

"You're speaking gibberish, now."

"Yeah, I tend to do that."

"... You wanted to ask me something?"

"Oh, yeah. Um... If I'm Subject Zero, are there any more?"

"Well, to my knowledge, there were five more. Arizona and Vermont, which are three and five, are the only other known ones."

"How was it determined who got what number?"

"Ranking on the day the experiments first started." She leaned against the nearest wall

"Ranking?"

"Yeah. You did manage to hold first rank for a week."

I flinched, "I what, now?" I looked down at the floor, "No, you probably got that wrong. I mean it's weak, little adipose me who can't even shoot a moving target."

"Your contribution in obtaining the sarcophagus brought you there. Carolina was pissed, always picking a fight with you. She got even more mad when I knocked you down to second place-"

"Causing her to be in third." I looked up, "She was always comfy in top rank. You were supposed to be the only one to have pegged her down."

"So you've said." She directed her focus on the door, "How much longer until Church is ready with my body?"

"Well, I'm sure he's getting them now, if you want to check up on them."

"Alright." She pushed herself off the wall, "Let's go."

* * *

><p>"Hello everyone! We're here to surrender!" Tucker yelled, "At this time, we would like to ask for one representative slash prisoner from each group to cross sides."<p>

"Hey." I waved. Tex wasn't with me, but she was watching the body she was about to get.

"Oh, hey." Tucker waved back, "How'd you get here so fast?"

"I used the teleporter." I pointed behind me.

"That thing works, now?"

"..." I looked behind me real quick, then looked back, "Evidently. Probably shoulda thought about that before I turned myself into a lab rat... huh?" I laughed.

"Yeah." He turned to face Donut, "Okay, get going pinky." Donut started to make his way back to the Reds.

"Goodbye, Major Cinnamon Bun!" Caboose yelled after him, "I will always remember your buttery goodness!"

I giggled, "Bye, Donut! Do come back, but under different circumstances!" I watched as he quickly turned to face me. 'Shit.' I thought to myself, 'He thought I didn't know his name.' He turned back around and continued to make his way back to the reds, "And here comes Francisco Montague Zanzibar." I laughed, "And, hopefully later, robot number two."

"Why didn't you give the other one a fancy name?" Tucker glanced at me.

"¡Alto, traidor!" (Don't move, traitor! [Spanish]) Lopez walked in front of Francisco's body. Man, I love using that name. It's a shame it doesn't come again later in the series... I think.

I took a deep inhale, "¡López, esos son sólo cáscaras huecas! ¡Es inútil tratar de razonar con ellos! ¡Te prometo, que no los están utilizando en contra de su ejército de robots!" (López, those are just empty shells! It is useless to try to reason with them! I promise, we are not using them against your army of robots!) I yelled.

"¿Me puedes engender?"(You understand me?) I managed to here him say.

"No!" Tucker pointed his weapon at Lopez, "Stay where you are! Do not go back!"

"Tucker." I hissed through my teeth, pulling his weapon down about forty-five degrees, "Let's not resort into violence. I have this taken care of... ¡¿Puedo ir al baño?!" (Can I go to the bathroom?)

"¡Idiota!" (Idiot) Our robot friend yelled back.

"¡Estoy bromeando! ¡Estoy bromeando!" (I'm just kidding! I'm just kidding!) I yelled back, flailing my arms, "¡Acabo de volver y vamos a tener una conversación civilizada! ¡Ellos no muy intelligente," I pointed at Tucker and Caboose, "pero al menos puedes hablar conmigo!" (Just come back so we can have a civilized conversation! They're not very smart, but you can always talk to me!)

"OW, MOTHER-what the hell is that noise?!" Tucker shouted.

I turned to face Caboose, "He, buddy? Can you do me a favor and shoot me now? Don't bother removing the bullet." I looked down at his gun, which was still holstered, "You know what? Never mind. Crayons won't do the job properly. " I took another inhale, "Escucha, López , ves a tomer par un personaje malvado , sólo asegúrese de que no me dispares." (An attempt at: Listen, Lopez, you're going to be taken by an evil character, just make sure you don't shoot me.)

"Usted ha dicho que mal. Tú sabes que yo entiendo Inglés , ¿verdad?" (You said that wrong. You know I understand english, right?)

"This is why I'm not fluent." I sighed, "Porque puedo confiar en usted con la información, en tanto que estos chicos harán algo para quitarse la vida con la información. Acaba de obtener su trasero por aquí." (Because I can trust you with information, where as these guys will do something to kill themselves with information. Just get your rear over here.)

"Wait everyone!" Tucker yelled, at last, "Stop fighting! It's all a lie! Red... is blue..." He looked at me, not turning his head. How I saw through his helmet? Maybe I didn't. Maybe it's my sixth sence, "Blue is red! We're all the same!"

"Oh yeah." I spoke meekly, "I said something along those lines before, didn't I?"

"I'll talk to you about that later." He sighed.

Church showed up next to his body, "Tucker, you're radio's giving too much feedback. Shut it off."

"Yeargh!" Caboose yelled, "This is fun."

I made an attempt to rub my temples, but failed, "This is too much noise for my taste." I mumbled.

"Stop fighting! Stop fighting!" Tucker yelled once again, as I started hearing white noise, " I said there's there's no Red versus Blue! There all-" I pushed him out of the way of the incoming missile, causing me to get caught in to explosion.

Upon my landing, I must've hit my head. I heard a constant ringing and a few hazy voices, but I couldn't make them out. A concussion? Maybe. I stood up, feeling my right arm throb, but I can't look at it now. I tried to yell at O'Malley, but I couldn't even hear my own voice. I watched as the man in purple clad armor took Lopez, through my somewhat blurry vision, and I attempted to run after him. I ended up falling, for the dizzyness that went through my head slowly became unbearable. By the time I saw the rest of team blue hovering over me, I was practically out of it.

* * *

><p>I woke up being carried. Didn't know by who, but I was. All I saw was those behind us, Simmons, Church, and Sarge. They were obviously talking, but I was unable to hear them. I was set down on top of whichever base I ended up on and looked up at Tucker, the man who had obviously been carrying me. He tried saying something, but I was still unable to hear him. He sat down in front of me, taking off my helmet, and then made a motion with his arms that pretty much said take it easy and just control your breathing. I hadn't noticed my breathing pattern before then, as I slowly began to stop the gasps that I had originally been taken.<p>

I saw the helmets of those looking in my direction. Some were surprised to see a girl under this bulky armor, others glad that I was okay. The helmets eventually lost focus of me and began to say unknown things to each other. My hearing eventually came back and my sight became not so much as blurry in about an hour or so.

"Okay. We all agree, that while the current situation, is not totally ironic, the fact that we now have to work together, is odd in an unexpected way, that defies our normal circumstances. Is everybody happy with that?" Church said to the current crowd.

"Yeah." I stood up, supporting myself with a pillar, "When do we go."

"Oh, no." Church responded to me with a strict tone, "You're staying here. You got yourself injured."

"I can take care of myself." I pouted, forgetting that my helmet wasn't on anymore as I suddenly felt the sunburn that had formed on my scalp, "It's your fault O'Malley's still out there. All of you guys abandoned Dufresne and left him alone. He probably left his radio on."

"Yeah, but you going out there and killing yourself isn't a solution." Tucker pitched in.

"If I die, I die. It's not like anyone would notice."

"Quit being such a bitch and sit back down." Church ordered, "You can't even stand on your own, so why should we allow you on a battlefield?"

"Look around us! We are in a battlefield! We're always in a battlefield!"

"Sit down and stay in Blood Gulch. That's an order."

I complied, huffing with a single breath, "I still feel like I can help, but go ahead and watch the teleporter glitch."

"Don't sabotage the teleporter." He ordered again.

"Don't worry," I waved at his dismissively, "I won't."

"Um..." Simmons spoke up, "The teleporter's ready."

"We'll leave one member of each team so that noone can trick anyone and take over the canyon." Sarge spoke up, "Our man will be Donut."

"We will leave Corporal Croissandwich!" Caboose practically cheered.

"Caboose..." Church spoke in a stern tone.

"We'll leave Sheila." He said, melancholy.

"I'll stay here with Walker." Tucker spoke up.

"No, man." Church said, "Then the teams won't be even."

"Hey, do you want a tank or someone who may shoot her when we leave to take care of her, or do you wan't someone who won't end up hurting her?" He defended.

Church looked at me, then at Sheila and Donut, "Fine."

I watched as Tucker sat down and all the men went through the teleporter.

"So?" Tucker spoke up.

"Fuck you." I huffed, "I can take care of myself."


	16. Reparations

"Vi sitter här I venten och spelar lite DotA pushar p smeker, med motstndet vi leker Vi sitter här I venten och spelar lite DotA springer runt creepar, och motstndet vi sleep." I sung

"FOR GOD'S SAKE!" Tucker yelled, "START SINGING ENGLISH SONGS!"

"Shut up. I'm mad at you." I pouted, continuing to hum the song.

"Please?" He said in a more calm voice.

"I don't know many English songs." I sighed.

"What about the one you sung to Caboose?"

"That song makes me cry."

"Then what other songs do you know?"

"Bad Boy by Cascade, Stand in the rain by Superchic, any My Chemical Romance song, and like ten others."

"None of those are familiar."

I shrugged, "Well, give me a trumpet, and I may be able to play a song or two off of memory."

"You play trumpet?"

"Taught myself how. My first instrument was french horn."

"Hey." Donut walked up to us, "Can I join you guys? I'm bored! All these girls wanna talk about is chick stuff, and not the fun chick stuff like ribbons and unicorns."

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that." I crossed my arms.

"Oh, sorry." He laughed. I turned to Tucker, remembering that he's going to be on the wanted list by Freelancer.

"What?" He asked, probably thinking I was checking him out.

"Um... nothing." I said slowly as I looked down trying to process information.

"You think I'm that good looking?" He laughed.

"You're in armor. If I were interested, what would be the point?" I put my head in my hands.

"Well, you know what I look like, anyways."

"Donut," I looked up at the man in pink... er... lightish red armor, "Do you think there's a way for you to bring Doc over here?"

"I can't." He said back to me, "He got possessed by that evil guy and they escaped. He's the one that shot you. Don't you remember?"

"Yeah, I know. I want him to shoot me again."

"Now now now, sounds like someone's got a case of the 'poor me's."

"No, I'm serious. My whole right side hurts and I have to deal with this guy." I motioned to Tucker, "It's not worth it."

"Maybe we should take your armor off and clean which ever wound is there." Tucker suggested,

"Very subtle." I glanced at him.

"Nah, really."

I sighed, "I'm not likely to do that anytime soon."

"You would've said the same for the helmet, and I think I can force you out of the rest of that armor." He inched closer.

"Nope." I stood up, stumbling a bit, and walked towards Tex, who was most likely making her way to Tucker, "He's definitely on the wanted list?"

"Yeah." She gave a short laugh, "Can't tolerate him anymore?"

"He threatened to force me out of my armor." I muttered, looking down toward the ground.

"Well," She look at my right side, "There is a big dent where your rib cage is."

"Is there?" I looked up.

"Yeah, and it's probably torn on the inside."

"But it's cushioned on the inside."

"There are multiple layers. One of them could've possibly torn through the cushioning." She continued her pursuit for Tucker as I followed, "Bad news Tucker. I just picked up a feed. You've been tagged."

"Tagged?" Tucker sounded concerned, "That sounds bad. Unless it means something sexual. Does it mean something sexual?"

"No. It means someone's hired a freelancer to take you out." I held the bridge of my nose. Is sex the only thing this guy thinks about?

"Do you have any idea why?" Tex finished.

"I can't say." Tucker responded.

"Keeping secrets? I find that attractive."

"You do?!"

"In attractive people, yeah."

"Well, I'm gonna go." I spoke up motioning toward the doorway to the base, "I'll get back to you when I can."

"You need help?" Tex asked.

"Nah... Just... have fun? I don't know. Whatever you do in this canyon." I started walking down the stairs.

"Man, I hate this. This sucks." Was the last thing I hear from Donut.

Shortly upon entry of the base, I began to pry my armor off. Some parts were harder than others. Tex was right. One of the middle layers was shredded and sticking through the cushion, poking into my skin. Once the armor was off, I examined my right arm and torso, checking to see how deep the wounds have become.

"I'm definitely going to need stitched. Is there a sewing kit nearby?" I sighed, standing up, "This is red base, right? Donut should have a sewing kit somewhere." I shuffled around, taking probably too long, before I found a medical kit and a hammer. I quickly wiped away the strawberry jelly-like substance from my side then pulled out and threaded the needle, "This is gonna hurt like hell, isn't it?" I sighed. After a few seconds of heavy breathing, I hurried up with the stitches, making sure they were secure, then I closed the kit, grabbing the hammer and hobbling over to my suit of armor. Once I got to my armor, I sat down and started hammering the practically shredded center of the armor back into position.

"Hey, Walker." I heard Tucker's voice and footsteps down the stairs, "We're about go in about a- Holy shit!" He exclaimed as he saw me, in a bloody shirt and stitched up and down my right arm and torso.

"Yeah, yeah. I look like a wreck." I sighed, still working on my armor, "No big deal really." I shrugged.

"No big deal?! You could've died!"

"Not anytime soon." I gave a short laugh.

He crossed his arms, "If you get so careless, then yes."

"Aw," I looked up, "does someone feel guilty that they were supposed to be caught in the line of fire? I should feel touched."

"Well, if you didn't push me away-"

"If I didn't push you away," I held up the hammer and pointed it at him, "you'd probably be dead. Can we take the fact that I'm alive and leave it at that?" I took a last few hits to my armor, and it was finally smooth again.

"Just..." He sighed, "be careful... okay?"

"Yeah, yeah." I started getting back into my armor, "I'll be up in a minute."

"Alright." He made his way back upstairs as I traced my new stitches with my fingers and eventually fastening the last of my armor.


	17. But a Lightning Bolt is Scary Enough

"I'm not going through that thing. I'm serious." Tucker protested as I knelt down retrieve.

"What? Did you expect that we would walk." I locked my helmet in place.

"I never knew a Phillips screwdriver was the X one." Donut started talking, "Do you think it's named after a guy named Phillip? That guy, Phillip, must have a fucked-up-shaped head."

"We're fucked." I murmured.

"Yeah. Screw this, I'm walking." Tucker turned around.

"Do you even know where you're going?" I clenched my fists, almost ready to punch him.

"Um..." He turned his head to face me.

"Yeah, I thought so... And you have a bounty on your head." I planted my hand on my hip for emphasis, "Even if you knew what you were doing, you wouldn't easily make it out alive."

"Ah, so you do care." He laughed, smugly.

My face went red with rage, "You know what? Go get killed. See if I care."

"So what if I die?" He shrugged, "I can roam the universe like Church."

I quickly glanced at Tex, then bit my tongue, "Yeah. You have fun with that."

"Fine. I will." He took a step forward.

"Fine." I grit my teeth.

"Good bye."

"Good riddance."

"I may never come back!"

"Good!" I watched as he continued to walk away, "... Dammit. You two stay here." I sprinted after him.

* * *

><p>"Good luck everyone, take care. I packed you all lunches for the trip." Sheila spoke to us, watching us through her main cannon.<p>

"Thank you Sheila." I smiled, "I'm sorry for hating and not being able to trust you earlier."

"You hated Sheila?" Tucker turned to face me.

"She's a talking killing machine." I motioned to her.

"Oh, well..." He turned to face the said M8O8V Main Battle Tank, "Thanks Sheila, that was really nice of you."

"Not really." Donut piped, "All my bag had was an air filter and a thermos full of brake fluid."

"Make sure to wash your exhaust pipes every day." The tank said as Tex then Donut walked through the transporter.

"Bye Sheila, we'll come back for you soon." Tucker said as he walked up to the transporter.

"I'll be waiting." She said in her usual tone as he stepped through the portal.

"Well," I sighed, "I'm sure Church will explain better, but we won't be back for a while. Take care of the base for us, okay?"

"Will do." Was that last thing I heard from Blood Gulch as I ran through the transporter, ending up in... well... where is this again. Sidewinder?

"Just me? What the fuck?" Tucker exclaimed as he was covered in soot.

"Tucker, Walker, I am so glad to see you." Caboose seemed happy, "Here. Let me help you clean your armor off, by rubbing you all over." Tucker and Caboose ran off, leaving me with team red.

"Ooh ooh, let me help!" Donut ran after them.

"Um... Hi?" I smiled, weakly.

"Why in Sam Hill are you here if you suffered a fatal wound?" Sarge complained.

"It was hardly fatal... and I kinda found the.." My words trailed off.

"You found what?" Simmons questioned me.

"I... um.. found the med kit in your base and patched myself up."

"Damn blue!" Sarge raised his shotgun in the air.

"Um... guys?!" I started running toward where Tucker, Caboose, and Donut were, "W-wait up!"

* * *

><p>"Alright, O'Malley, just stop." I sighed.<p>

"She has a point." Doc spoke up, "We really shouldn't hurt anyone."

"Oh, do shut up." O'Mallley spat out, "Why would I stop? I'm just one step closer to world domination!"

"World freaking domination is not the answer!" I shouted.

He turned to face Lopez, "You know what to do."

A lightning bolt struck right next to me, "HOLY SHIT!" I jumped.

"I hate to interrupt," Simmons spoke up, "but zero seconds."

"Well, goodbye guys." I sighed, preparing for impact. Shortly after, everything went white


	18. Bullet Wounds Aren't Very Appealing

**Many Years Ago, Mother of Invention; Medical Bay**

"Come on, Omega." Lazerus tried to persuade my little, AI friend, "Is there any way that you can prevent her from losing memories?"

"Who do you take me for?" Omega spat out, "If I wanted to, I can prevent her from remembering."

"Alright then," He sighed, "let me rephrase that. Fix it before I grab a time machine and prevent your creation."

"Don't you dare." I snapped, in an almost playful tone.

"You're siding with the AI?"

"Well," I looked down toward the ground, "He kinda plays a major role... later on."

"Oh really?" He spoke in a sarcastic tone, "I didn't think he'd possess multiple people in hopes of world domination. Since you figured that on your own, maybe we could hold a parade in your honor. I'll drive the float, and C.T. is in charge of confetti."

"You've proven your point." I laughed under my breath.

He looked up at my forehead, "That's healing up pretty well."

"Is it?" I covered up the wound with my fingers, "I don't see why I'm in quarantine for this."

"Well, people don't exactly enjoy the sight of a bullet wound to the head of someone... and it'd be weird for you to be alive, and obviously supposed to be dead."

"You sure it's fine to not stitch it up?" I brought my hand back to the counter I had been sitting on.

"Hey, it worked last time, did it not?"

"I guess." I sighed, watching the Omega AI log off, "Hey, I'm sorry for not remembering who you are."

"It's not your fault. You just gotta stop apologizing and live and let die."

"I guess." I stretched out my arms, "It'd be hell if that happened in the middle of a battle."

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day<strong>

_Gasp. Cough cough._

I woke up in a series of coughing, that refused to stop for a moment. I opened my eyes to see Donut kneeling down, locking is helmet into place, "You... better not... have fucking given me... CPR." I wheezed as my body tried to oxygenize itself.

"No. Almost had to, though." He laughed, "You looked like a corpse."

I sat up and held my head, "Well, it's good to be alive."

He looked around for a moment, "So, we're the only two awake at the moment. What now?"

"Make a play for Simmons, Sarge, Grif, and Caboose." I mumbled, trying to ignore the throbbing pain at the back of my head.

"That actually sounds like a good idea." He looked up at me, "You did hit your head pretty hard. You don't feel any brain damage, do you?"

"What dain bramage?" I asked, jokingly.

"You know, like a concussion or something." He obviously didn't get the joke.

"Nah, I'm fine." I sighed, sitting up, putting my helmet back on, and starting my wait for when everyone wakes up.

"Where do you think we are?"

"I think we time traveled." I laughed under my breath.

"Or teleported." He turned his head to face me, "Nah, time travel makes more sense."

* * *

><p>"Hey, he's awake!" Donut practically cheered as he hovered over Tucker, "Guys, Tucker's awake."<p>

"Huh?" Simmons walked over to Tucker, "Hey hey hey, take it easy Tucker, you've been out a while."

"Walker, Walker, let's go say hi to Tucker!" Caboose pulled at my arm.

"Um," I watched him for a moment, "you go on ahead."

"Tucker! Tucker! I'm so glad you are alive." Caboose ran over to the said man.

"Caboose?" Tucker spoke up, "Still so dumb, but you look so different."

"We're in the future!" He cheered, "Things are shiny here."

"The future?" Tucker laughed, "Oh I can't fucking wait to hear this one."

"All in all," I sighed, crossing my arms, "and because I don't want to see the freaking play for the umpteenth time, Church had a 10 megaton bomb, and Lopez was using his weather thingy. With the two combined, the explosion 'destroyed' the present and threw us in the future. This is all theoretical, of course."

"Why don't you want to see my play, again?" Donut whined, "It portrays reality with such detail."

"Theoretical reality." I corrected him.

"Wait wait wait." Tucker spoke up, "Aren't we in the present right now? Aren't we always in the present?"

"Yeah." I mumbled, "These numbnuts obviously don't care about actual knowledge. Just say we're in the future."

"Alright then." He sighed, "How come we were thrown in the future? Shouldn't we have been blown up in the present?"

"Yeah," Simmons started to explain, "you see, luckily Church was facing forward when the bomb went off, and we were standing in front of him. So that sent us forward in to the future."

"See," I laughed in a quiet manner, "This is the logic of the Reds and Blues."

"If Church was facing forward during the explosion," he tried to put the pieces together, "and that blew us in to the future, that could mean that he was blown backward in to the... _oh no!"_

"I completely agree." I brought my arms back to my sides.

"Wait." Sarge spoke up once again, "Backwards in to what? A wall? A broom closet?"

"A big rock?" Grif questioned.

"Another big rock!" Caboose cheered.

"No. The past." Tucker and I said at the same time, as he looked at me (probably with a cheeky smile on his face).

"So, what now?" Donut asked.

"First, we need a vehicle." I took a few steps, being sure to look around me, "Maybe water, too. Depends on how long we're going to be here."

"Maybe we should get started now." Simmons suggested.

"Yeah, that's probably the smarter idea."

* * *

><p><strong>So, that's it. Sorry for shortness of length, but I haven't posted in a while... well... ciao.<strong>


	19. Do You Even Know How To Drive?

**Many Years Ago, Mother of Invention **

I just sat there in front of the toilet, holding my stomach as I watched my lunch spiral down to who knows where... seriously, though. Do they have a waste compartment on this ship or do they just eject everything into space... I'm not going to bother with figuring that out. My head shot up as I heard a light tap on the door.

"Hey, you alright in there?" It was a male voice, but I couldn't distinguish whom the voice had belong to.

"Can you just get me a medic?" I managed to croak as I hovered over the toilet. Foot steps started, and got quieter until there was silence. I just sat there, trying to calm myself down. This is probably just stress, right? I'm just overworking myself. I'm not meant for physical activities. I'm obviously more analytical. The footsteps came back, getting louder and louder as the, although quiet, sound started to make my ears ring. The door slowly opened as I watched a man with light brown hair, blue eyes, and a mask walk in and kneel down in front of me. Strange, actually. I thought the medics on this ship all wore armor... maybe that's later, since, as of now, this is before the events of season nine.

"Just relax, I'm not going to hurt you." He said as he opened my mouth and took my temperature. There was silence, for a short moment, until the thermometer let a soft, high-pitched beep, "Well, that's a fever, alright." He took the thermometer out of my mouth and set it down on the ground.

"Who are you?" I managed to say.

"I'm your medic for today." He said as he took a stethoscope to my back.

"That doesn't help." I looked at the medical tools that he had brought with him, "I thought there were more technological stuff on this ship."

"Oh, there are. I just... don't quite understand them, yet." He said, almost sheepishly.

"That's silly." I laughed, coughing at the end.

"Well, I think I know what you caught." He took the stethoscope off of my back, "It's and alien disease. You got a Yanme'e Flu."

"You sound like a fucking nerd."

"That's because I am a frickin' nerd."

"So, what the heck is a Yanme'e Flu?"

"Well," He pause for a moment, "I thought I still had yet to find someone who wasn't immune to it. It's on every Earth colony, and takes about one month to incubate. The symptoms are shortness of breath, sensitivity to noise, loss of hunger, nausea, about one hundred degree fever, and illusions. Trust me, I know. I'm the only one I know who's had this."

"Well, that's just swell." I sighed, "I'm sorry to disappoint you in your hopes to not encounter this again, but I can't say I'm exactly from around here."

"You're not?" He watched me, determination in his eyes, "Then, where are you from?"

"Massachusetts." I spoke hesitantly, wondering what was going through his mind, "Little less tech, little more political issues."

"So that only means that..." His words trailed off.

"It only means what?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Let me reintroduce myself." He extended his hand, "Hi, my name is Lazerus."

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day<strong>

"Hey Sarge, what's that metal thing that looks like a bunny!? Ooh, ooh, and what's that other metal thing that looks like a soup can?" Donut spoke from under the Jeep.

"Donut." I sighed, "Don't pet the bunny, or else your hand will go in the soup can."

"No, I don't think getting new rims for the jeep's a good idea." Simmons argued with Grif.

"Oh come on! If we all kick in, we can get some spinners, some kickass subs, hydraulics!" Grif tried to defend his case.

"I'm in." Tucker said, nonchalantly.

"Why?"

"Uh, for style?"

"For chicks!"

"Just so you know," I spoke from inside the Jeep, as I tried to fix the radio. It's sad that I don't know a lick about electronics, but I try anyways. It makes me feel like I'm helping, "when someone says 'not if your the last man on Earth,' they literally mean that if you were the last man on Earth, your species would die."

"What about you then?" He leaned on the hood.

"Not if you were the last man on Earth." I scoffed.

"She got you good." Grif laughed.

Sarge stood up, "If you ladies are through gossipping, I could use some help fixing our vehicle."

"Oh yeah, right, here let me try." Grif started the Jeep and moved about a foot.

"Wait!" Sarge and I managed to say in sync as a loud screech eminated from under the vehicle.

"Donut, are you okay?" Sarge turned to face where Donut had been lying down.

"I was just petting the bunny... and it went in to the soup can... and part of my hand went with it." Donut whimpered as Sarge grunted and lied back down.

"Bunny and hand soup," Tucker started, "just like Mom used to make."

"Donut, I told you not to touch anything. You touched everything!" Sarge was mad.

"Wow, blue." Grif turned to face me, "Are you psychic?"

"No, just observant." I sighed, lying my head on the dashboard.

"I feel dizzy, Sarge..." Donut whined.

"Oh, that's just blood loss." Red team's leader spoke, "You'll make new blood. You just need some orange juice."

"Orange juice does not help with blood production... I think." I mumbled.

"What's the rush in getting this thing fixed, anyway?" Tucker interrupted my 2.5 milliseconds of silence.

"Listen, dirtbag," Sarge went off again, "I know on Blue Team you like to lollygag a bit-"

"There is no Blue Team." He defended, "It's all a lie. Red and blue are the same."

"Aw, don't start that crap again." Grif.

"You sound like a conspiracy nut when you talk about that stuff. The government put a chip in my brain." Simmons.

"The President can hear my thoughts." Grif again.

"The government put cameras on bugs in order to watch my every day life." I said, not moving my head.

"We never landed on the sun." Donut said, weakly.

Grif gave a sharp inhale, "They put fluoride in my water!"

"That one's true." I lifted my head up.

"It is?" He seemed almost surprised, "No wonder I listen to so much pop music."

"The point is," I sighed, trying to gather information, "Blue is red and vice versa. I'm not going to give you all the facts, but you'll learn eventually."

"An' why should we listen to a bluetard like you?" Sarge protested.

"Because I'm the only one here that was trained to fight Innies, and a Sim soldier like you isn't that much of a hassle." I said, without thinking.

"Who're you callin a Sim soldier, blue!"

I sighed, stepping out of the jeep, "Forget it. I'm not in the mood to fight."

* * *

><p>I was sitting by where the Jeep had crashed. My fault for tagging along in the back seat. I'm honestly impressed with myself. My armor contains a molecular compressor, and it contains nothing but books. Yes I'm a book worm, but who'll be laughing when I enjoy my apocalypse with a little Grimms' Fairy Tales on the side.<p>

"Wait a second. This thing isn't busted. It's just out of gas." Sarge's voice went off.

"It runs on gas?" Grif questioned his superior.

"Solar energy." I said, breathlessly, still not looking up from my story of death and demise... Who broke me as a child?

"So then why is it dead, sir?" Simmons asked his Sergeant.

"You would have had to park it in the shade for at least two hours." The red soldier examined the vehicle, "What were you doing in the shade for two hours?"

"Well, I can tell you what we weren't doing..." Grif's words trailed off.

"I ship it!" I crossed my fingers in one hand and held it above me head.

"Ah, forget it. Come on, help me push this thing in the sunlight." Reds' leader ordered us, "One, two, three. Hurrniaaa." He grunted as I slowly walked over.

"Hurr. Man this thing weighs a ton." Grif pretended to work. I pushed the Jeep and it moved like a hot knife through butter, "Ow! You guys ran over my foot." He jumped back.

"Servers you right for being so lazy." Simmons sighed as he went to the dashboard.

"Your welcome." I huffed as I sat by the tire and opened my book once again.

"Grif," Sarge spoke up once again, "What happened to this fender?"

"It was like that when we took it out!" He defended.

"And where's the hubcap?"

"Man, this neighborhood's really going to crap."

"They crashed the car more than once." I sighed.

"Grif?!" The sergeant growled.

"She's lying!"

"The jeep's getting power." Simmons interrupted the tension as the warthog music went off.

"Turn that crap off." Sarge ordered then the music stopped and Tex went on, "What the, who's that?"

"It's Tex." I stood up and jumped into the jeep, sitting in the drivers seat and trying to make the transmission sound more clear.

"Hang up on her." Simmons started ordering me now.

"Good idea." Sarge agreed.

"I'm not going to hang up on her." I sighed, "She's not as much of a bitch as you guys may think."

"I repeat, I have found O'Malley's base." Tex said from the other side of the radio.

"O'Malley?" Sarge seemed surprised, "Son of a-"

"Where is she?" Simmons asked.

"You think I know?" I glared at him.

"S-sorry." He stammered.

"Maybe we could use the radio to triangulate her position." Grif suggested.

"No, that won't work." I lied back into the seat.

"Well, you're very open minded." He huffed.

"Well we do only have one radio." Simmons started.

"Yeah." I sighed, "Unless you what to find a point in between her and us, but that'll just make a line."

"Right, a line that we'll follow straight to Tex! It's the perfect mathematical plan!" The man in orange armor seemed too enthusiastic.

"Sarge, your team is full of idiots." I glanced reds said leader.

"You can take Grif prisoner once we're done with this." Sarge promised.

"Love the offer, but no."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah."

He looked at the ground, "I could simulate a third radio by using some this sand, and the heat from the jeep's tailpipee to make an enormous refractory lens, and then-"

"Or listen to the coordinates she's telling us." I turned up the volume.

"My coordinates are two two niner delta, by one point three seven gamma." She said in her still staticy voice.

I started the jeep, "Hurry up and get in. we need to pick up Tucker, Caboose, and Donut.

"Do you even know how to drive?" Grif questioned me.

"Tell you what, you can drive on the trip to two two niner delta one point three seven gamma."

"You didn't answer my question... and there are only three seats."

"Then figure it out."

"And Michele." Tex continued to talk, "In hopes that you haven't died, I hope you remember your training. Maybe you could teach those idiots how to fight."


	20. Cool! Super Strength!

**Many Years Ago, Mother of Invention**

"Hey Lazerus." I managed to stop the said man in front of his bedroom.

"Are you sick?" He turned to face me.

"Oh, no no." I waved my hands in front of me, "I just thought maybe we should talk or something..." my words got quieter, "without me having to be in the medical bay."

"I guess that's fine." He unlocked the door and opened it, "Come on in."

"Piano!" I cheered, running in and bashing the keys.

"Don't break that." He closed the door, "You can play on it if you want, but I just got it."

"Sorry. I don't know how to play." I continued bashing at the keys, "All I know is the white keys are natural notes and the black keys are sharps and flats." I stopped making noise from the keyboard, "God, I miss my trumpet."

"Well, just don't break it... and don't intentionally make it sound bad." He sat on his bed and pulled out a book.

"The Hobbit?"

"Yeah, have you read it?"

"Hidden somewhere ahead of us is the fair valley of Rivendell where Elrond lives in the Last Homely House. I sent a message by my friends, and we are expected. Chapter 3, page forty-six." I spoke confidently, tapping at the keys again.

"I'm going to assume you've read it enough times."

"I've only read it once... quite recently, though."

He glanced up at me, "Then that's some impressive memory you got there."

"Yeah." I took a sigh, then I watched my fingers, listening to what I was playing. 'two, four, one, ten.' I thought to myself as my fingers played along, 'Am I transmitting? Is anyone listening? Contact~' I brought my fingers to my side, "A lot of strange things have been happening, lately."

He closed his book and pulled out another from the bookshelf next to him, "Here read this." He held out a red book.

"A dictionary?" I asked in a bored tone, "I'm fluent in English, you know that, right?"

"Yeah. You're a fast reader. I just want to check something out for a bit." He persisted.

I took the book, reading a page every second, taking eight point nine hours to read. This converted into thirty-two trillion point four simple nanoseconds. Alright, I'm starting to remember why I became afraid of myself, "Done." I groaned, throwing the book at his head and he made a sharp inhale, "What was the point in that."

"You frickin' woke me up." He rubbed his eyes.

"You were sitting up." I sighed, lying down on the ground, "Sorry for assuming."

"Alright." He laughed, flipping through the book, "What's the definition of Languid?"

"Languid. Adjective. Sluggish from fatigue or weakness. In the summer months, the great heat makes people languid and lazy." I spoke, nearly monotonically as I placed my arm over my eyes, "I need to sleep, and I haven't moved for six thousand, four hundred seconds. Do you mind if I spend the night?"

"Well, how about Mawkish?"

"Mawkish. Characterized by sick sentimentality. Although some nineteenth-century critics viewed Dickens's writing as mawkish, contemporary readers have found great emotional depth in his works."

"Well then," He closed the book, "Someone's developed a photographic memory along with invincibility." He lied back down, "Now go to bed so that I can sleep. I'm in charge of Washington's AI implantation tomorrow."

"Alright..." I stayed on the ground, closing my eyes.

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day<strong>

I groaned, lifting my head up, watching the scenery move in front of me.

"I swear it was an accident!" Someone started to yell, "I was trying to switch gears!"

"Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary, over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore." I quoted as I picked up the book Caboose had been holding onto for me.

"Why does she get to sit in the back?" Tucker complained, "Caboose is crushing my legs."

"Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before; but the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token, and the only word there spoken was the whispered word 'Lenore.' Merely this and nothing more."

"That's probably why." Grif retorted, "She's mental."

"Startled at the stillness broken by reply so aptly spoken, 'doubtless,' said I, 'what it utters is its only stock and store caught from some unhappy master whom unmerciful disaster followed fast and followed faster till his sons one burden bore- till the dirges of his hope than melancholy burden bore of never-nevermore."

"She just acts a little high when she just wakes up."

"No I don't." I hit him on the back of the head.

"Ouch, watch it." He held where I hit him.

"Damn. You two act like an old married couple." Donut laughed at us.

"Fuck you, Donut." I sighed, looking down at the pages once more, "Are books edible, because I haven't eaten for twelve hours."

"If you want conjuctivitous." Donut suggested.

"This isn't a library book."

"What's a library?" Tucker pitched in.

"A place where people get books and bring them back." I closed the books, knowing I won't be able to finish it, "Are we sure we know which direction we're going?"

"I'm ninety nine point nine percent sure." Simmons promised.

"Well, in the event that we don't, maybe we should split into four teams."

"Why four?" He turned to face me.

"Well, there's six.. of us." I laughed, noticing what I just said.

"Who wants to be cut in half?" Tucker laughed, starting laughter throughout the rest of the jeep.

"Well," I looked at the giant building in the distance, "We're actually almost there." I gave one last short laugh, "Pull up over there." I pointed.

"And why should we take orders from a blue?" Sarge started.

"Because I'm the only blue who actually knows what's going on."

"Hey look, a mountain!" Caboose tried to stand up.

"Caboose, we passed the mountain ten minutes ago." Tucker sighed.

* * *

><p>"What took you guys so long to get here?" Tex asked as everyone, except me, was out of the jeep with me, still in the back, arm dangling off the side.<p>

"There's six of us, and this is only a three seater jeep." Simmons commented, "Half of us had to sit on someone else's lap."

"It was a great road trip." Donut cheered, "My favorite part was when Grif tried to change gears, and he accidentally-"

"Hugh, please, let's not tell the story again." Grif complained, "Is there somewhere I can wash my hands?"

"So, what next, Tex?" I hopped out of the jeep, stretching a bit.

"Well," She started, "O'Malley's holed up in his fortress. He's been fortifying his defenses for a few days now, and he's got some help. One of those religious nuts you guys picked up."

"Oh, I like them. They were funny." Caboose remembered.

"From a screen, not in reality." I muttered.

"What did you say?" Tucker caught on.

"Nothing." I said quickly, "What's the plan, Tex?"

"Well, first we have to breach the outer wall." She continued.

"Oh, I love breaching!" Caboose cheered. I stifled a laugh, then noticed Tucker was doing the same.

"Then, we have to get past another wall."

"Two walls?" Simmons objected, "Some people are so materialistic."

"How 'bout everyone let's he finish talking." I intervened as everyone became silent.

"The second wall has a guard tower, and an enormous razor-sharp spinning blade." Tex broke the deafening silence, "After that, we have to pass the gun turrets, and break in to the building."

"And then we attack O'Malley." Sarge interrupted as I glared at him.

"No." She kept her composure, "That's when we plant this." She motioned toward the bomb.

"We're planting a volleyball." Caboose spoke up as I made my way toward the spherical entity.

"It's not a ball, it's a bomb."

"We're planting a volleybomb?"

"I've scouted a location inside the base where we can set it off and take the whole place down. I marked the spot with a big X."

I sat next to the bomb and nudged it, "Hey there, Andy." I mumbled.

"You scouted it." Tucker questioned the Freelancer.

"Yeah." She answered.

"If you got past two walls, the huge spinning blade, the gun turrets, and made it all the way in to the fortress, why didn't you just plant the bomb then instead of putting a big X on the floor?"

"... I can't carry it." She confessed.

"What?" Grif seemed surprised.

"What was that?" So was Simmons.

"It's too heavy, okay? You happy?" She acted almost embarrassed.

"Yeah, kinda." Grif was pleased.

"I need one of you idiots to carry it. I don't have the upper body strength to move it on my own."

"See, girls act lilke they're so tough, but the first time they need someone to move a couch, who do they call."

"That's because if guys carry too much weigh in a large frequency, they don't have to have a hysterectomy." I yelled, "It's more dangerous for a woman to lift a sufficient amount of weight than it is for men! That doesn't mean we're weak!"

"What's a historical me?" Caboose asked.

"A hysterectomy is pretty much removal of the uterus." I sighed, nudging Andy once again, watching him move slightly.

"Where in my body is the uterus?" He honest to goodness asked as I burst into laugher and got many stares.

"Um..." I regained my composure, "I'll tell you later. We have a mission right now." I realized that Tex had been glaring at Grif.

"Please don't kill me." The orange soldier pleaded.

Sarge started walking over here, "Ahh, go ahead and kill him. We could use the armor for spare parts. Here, this thing doesn't look so heavy." He bent down to grab the bomb, "let me t-yooo that thing ain't movin'!"

"I can carry it." Caboose now made his way over here.

"I guarantee you'll need two people." Tex mentioned.

"No, it's true. He's got crazy strength." Tucker pitched in, "Church and I think it's God's way of compensating."

Caboose picked up the bomb, "See..." He grunted.

"Great Paul's Bunyan," Sarge was amazed, "He's like an ox."

"But I have no horns... or lumberjack friends." He said through gritted teeth.

Grif finally made his way over here, "Come on, no way it can be that bad. Let me give it a-" He took the bomb from Caboose and dropped to the ground, "Weaugh! Hugh. Okay, you can carry it." Caboose picked it up once again, exhaling heavily as he lifted with his legs.

"Hey, careful buddy. You don't want to suffocate." I laughed, "Here let me help." I held the bomb with him, watching him relax a bit.

"Thanks." He sighed. You could hear the smile in his voice.

"No problem..." I laughed, "You know, it's not that heavy. Maybe I could just take it off your hands."

"But I don't want you to get hurt." He said as he lifted a little bit of weight off of my end, "And then you'll have to get a historicalme... you already have anemia." Poor guy's confused.

"Trust me on this." I spoke in a calm manner as he gave me the bomb and backed away, probably afraid I'll drop it on his foot, "See, what did I say? Light." I chuckled as I spun it on my finger like one of those professional basketball players and it fell to the ground with a loud thunk, causing people to direct their attention towards our direction.

"Sorry." Caboose apologized for me.

"It was actually my fault." I sighed as I picked Andy back up, "Sorry buddy." I whispered as a Fuck You flashed on the screen, "Well that's rude."

"How come you're able to pick that up?" Grif questioned me.

"Um... push-ups for life?" I lied.

"That's a lie." Tucker laughed, "What's the truth?"

"Yeah," I put a hand on the back of my head, keeping hold Andy with the other, "It's not push ups... it's pull ups..." Or DNA imitating Crunchbite's 's a possibility. I don't quite know what genetic mutations I possess.

"So, back to what we just were talking about," Tex turned to face the others, "Sorry, but there is no way I'm letting O'Malley get away this time."

"How can we hire you, then." I offered, "I currently don't have any money on me, but I can offer you a favor."

"You want the robot head back too, huh?" She gave me a sideways glance, "Then that's different. I still owe you for that thing."

"What thing?" I asked in a barely audible tone.

"You'll remember eventually." She gave a short laugh and started walking, "Let's go."

* * *

><p>"Okay, is everyone ready?" Sarge spoke from the radio, which isn't really a smart idea, now that I think about it, "Donut, Caboose, Walker, and I will move the bomb down the staircase and along the left side of the base."<p>

"Man that looks heavy." Donut walked up to me.

"It's not really." I laughed, effortlessly holding it with one hand above my head.

"You really should consider wearing some kind of supportive undergarment." He ignored me.

"Does a bra count? It supports my chest." I snickered.

"You can borrow one of mine! I'm thinking something lace. Lace is totally in right now!"

"I don't like where this conversation may lead." I laughed nervously, taking a step back, accidentally bumping into Caboose.

"Hi?" He turned around.

"Oh... h-hey Caboose." I said, not so exasperated anymore, collapsing to the ground.

He giggled for a second, "Are you okay?" He extended his arm.

"Yeah. I'm just a bit of a cluts." I took his hand and stood back up, "Dammit. My neck's been hurting me since we got into this time frame. It's starting to get on my nerves." I rubbed the back of my neck, "Maybe I broke it, somehow." I said in a low voice.

"Well that's just crazy talk." Donut must've heard me, "If you broke your neck, you'd be dead by now."

"No she wouldn't." Caboose defended me, "She's invincible. Back in training, she fell onto a bed of nails and still lived."

"I what?" I asked, honestly a little amused.

"She what?" Sarge and Donut asked in sync.

"I'm sure he's just confused." I waved my hand dismissevely.

"But it's true." He turned to face me, "And you forgot a lot after that, too, saying how the last thing you remembered was a sharp pain."

"I'll ask you about that later." I whispered, "For now, I don't want my suspicion meter to raise." He was quiet, "It's a video game thing."

"Okay." He tilted his head a bit, but he understood what I had been telling him, none the less.

We started heading towards wherever the X was. Of course, I knew where it was, but the idea of watching these guys wander around aimlessly was fun while it lasted.

"Roger that. We are also in position." Sarge went back on the radio, "No sign of the enemy."

"Mahan, this is the easiest fortress invading mission, of all time." Donut exclaimed.

"Yeah it is- woah." I was pushed by one of the three man, causing me to drop the bomb, "Shit." I whimpered.

"Careful with that thing, Walker!" Sarge scolded me.

"Uh... Sarge?" Donut spoke up, thankfully taking notice of the gunner.

"You could blow us all to smithereens!"

"Sarge, I'm pretty sure that guy up there with the gun sees us."

"You wanna blow people to smithereens, at least make sure Grif is nearby."

I dropped flat on my stomach, "Duck!" Donut and I said in perfect sync.

"A duck?" Caboose jumped up, "Where? I love ducks."

I pulled at his arm so that he dropped to the ground, "Just stay down, Caboose."

"Walker, we'll hold them off from up here. You take the bomb and try to sneak in the front of the base."

"You're expecting him to shoot me down, aren't you." Still on the ground, I grabbed the bomb.

"Um... no?" He lied as I stood up and charged for the destination. In about a minute, I had already made my journey end, as I put the bomb on the X and sat down, listening to the constant, 'Caboose, is that you? Can you hear me?' from the console on the floor above.


	21. Project: Failed?

**Many Years Ago, Mother of Invention **

"What the heck was that?!" Lazerus kept hold of the medical bed he had been on.

"Ship probably crashed." I shook my head and pushed myself off the floor, "It's the right time frame."

"Of course it's the right time frame. If you don't remember, Tex shot me because I tried to reason with her." He stayed calm, "Just fill a syring with the contents of that bottle over there." He pointed as I happily complied.

"You're stubborn." I laughed, grabbing tweezers and gauze, "I haven't easily forgotten that medicle training you gave me, yet." I walked over to him, setting the stuff on a desk-like structure. Seriously, what the fuck is the name of that metal thing where doctors and dentists set tools. I know it's not just called a tray, right? Look, I'm rambling.

"Dammit, that hurts." He winced as I started to pull one of many bullets.

"You're such a baby." I laughed again.

"Well, sorry that I use anaesthetics when I do this on you. Maybe next time you can be conscious."

"You're just saying that." I laughed once more, binding the open wound. I turned to face the window, "Where do we go next? Freelancer's fallen, and I'll die before I become a Sim. Trooper. All that's available is finding home."

"Yeah." He spoke in a low voice, almost as if he was hiding something.

"I should probably pack a bag." I laughed, "Who knows what we'll have to face next." Just then, I felt a dull pain in the back of my neck.

"Sorry, but I'm a goner. Just live the rest of your life with a fresh start. Only specific stimuli can make you remember. If you remember anything, don't persue Tex." With that, I fell to the ground, "I'm sorry." That weeping voice was the last thing I heard before I woke up in the snow, last remembered falling asleep and a broken heart as the cause of death.

* * *

><p><strong>A Few Years Ago, Sim. Soldier Training Facility<strong>

I woke up with tears brimming my eyes. It was still dark, and it not officially time to wake up. I've been woken up, somehow. I turned in order to lie on my side and saw a figure of blonde hair and blue eyes, that was barely visible in the moonlight.

I shot out of bed, hitting my head on the bunk above me, "Caboose?" I hissed, grabbing my glasses from the nightstand next to me, "What are you doing in the girls' bunker? You're going to get in trouble."

"There's no one here." He whimpered, ducking his head down, "I though it'd be okay."

I pinched the bridge of my nose, "Even if there's one girl in here, you can still get in trouble. And what do you mean no one? there are at least ten others scattered around here?"

He raised his head once again, "Could you tell me a story?"

I pondered on the thought for a moment, adjusting my glasses so that they didn't fall off my nose, "Once upon a time," I sighed, unsure how perceptive Caboose can be, "there was a girl. She was pretty much your average girl in her second year of college for her majors in forensics and music, taking a night shift in Walmart, and trying to fend for herself. You know, the basics." I took a breath, trying to recollect that fateful night, "One night, she curled up in bed, watched a few episodes of her favorite shows, set her glasses on her nightstand, and fell into a deep sleep. When she woke up, she had no idea where she had been and began to wander aimlessly. She didn't realize where she was until she found a familiar sight. It was then that she realized she was in the show that she watched so fondly. Time went by as she trained to be one of the greatest soldiers. She assumed she was alone, for no one understood what it was like to try to find home and fail so often. Finally, she met probably the only other person in the universe that could feel her pain. Together, they spent years researching how to get back home, but life happened to get in the way. The girl had been genetically altered so that she could not die, but the other was forced to have his life end. The girl wanted to remember, but she ended up taking the medicine to make her forget. She forgot the cause of her pain. She forgot the fun she actually had in this universe. She roamed the universe, alone once again, feeling and not remembering why she felt the pain of loss... because she was forced to forget until all that was left was that fateful night where she watched her favorite show, set her glasses on her nightstand, and fell asleep." I watched Caboose as he lied there, motionless and asleep, "Goodnight, buddy." I set my glasses back on the stand next to me, curled up into a ball under the covers, and fell asleep once more."

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day<strong>

"You guys should probably make your way over here." I said over the radio as I searched through the molecular compressor, "I woke up with nothing but the armor on my back that time, so either I bought another copy of that book, or Lazerus stored it on this. Maybe his notes are in here."

"What in Sam Hill are you talking about?" Sarge asked over the radio.

"Sorry. I must've left my radio on." I shut off the radio, and almost immediately, Caboose came running in.

"Walker! What is wrong? Are you hurt?" He looked me over for a moment.

"Caboose, is that you? Can you hear me?" The recording went off again.

"Church?" He walked up to the console.

"Caboose, is that you? Can you hear me?"

"Yes, Church. I can hear you. What is wrong?"

"Caboose, is that you? Can you hear me?"

"Church, I can hear you."

"Caboose, is that you? Can you hear me?"

"Caboose?" I interrupted the one-sided conversation, "It's just a recording."

"No. It's Church, and he's meaner than ever." He whimpered.

"Caboose, is that you? Can you hear me?" The recording went off once more.

"How 'bout you bring everyone here so that we can bring Church back." I suggested.

"Okay!" He ran out, leaving me back to my search.

Alice in wonderland was the next item to come onto the holographic screen, "This is going to take a while." I sighed, flipping through the inventory until something struck me as odd. _Note di Transporto Universale (_Universal Transportation Notes) _by Lazerus X. Ray _was written across the book in large font. The only thing odd about that was that I don't remember him knowing Italian. There were a few others signed by his name such as _Soggetti Freelancer da Uno a Dieci _(Freelancer Subjects One through Ten) and _Note Mediche _(Medical Notes).

"Three books in one inventory check." I snickered, pulling out the Freelancer one.

"Did you just pull a book out of thin air?" Simmons asked as red team (minus Donut) and Caboose started to walk in.

"Yeah." I leaned against the control panel, "What are you going to do about it?"

"Nothing." He shrugged.

"Yeah. We can obviously accept your super strength and magician skills." Grif joked.

"Sure." I said, almost monotonically, as I read the leather-bound book. Damn, he has great hand-writing, and there are no errors in his writing (which was all in Italian, but for the sake of this story, it will be translated).

"I looked at some files." The notebook read, "The Director will kill me if he finds out, but I just had to know. Subject Zero: Michele (New Hampshire) Walker. Abilities: Undying, Strength, Greater Memory Capacity. Project: failed."

"Failed?" I asked in a low voice, "How was I failed?" I looked at my hands, "All those abilities seem to apply."

"Director's notes:" I read on, "She ended up knowing too much. She used her abilities and rebelled along with Agents Texas and New York. She must be quarantined."

"Sucks to be you." I laughed... "Wait, that was when Lazerus was shot... When did he have time to write this?"

"Subject One:" I continued to read.

"How are you just sitting there?!" Someone yelled at me, "We're all going to die!" I looked up to see Tucker.

"If this is another trick to get me to sleep with you, it's not working." I sighed, closing to book and putting it back in inventory.

"Although that would be great, the bomb's about to go off!" He continued.

I looked down at his hand, then looked back up, "Well, we wouldn't be in danger if you hadn't brought that in with you."

"How are you so calm about this?!"

"Because I know what's going on, and we're no going to die."

"Why do you say that?! There's not much time left on the bomb!"

"Fine, I'll see if I can talk to Andy." I started walking.

"Who is Andy?" I heard Tex ask.

"Hell if I know." Tucker answered, and with that, I went down stairs, and waited for Church to come back.


	22. Twins

**I got a nice, long chapter for you guys :3 enjoy!**

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><p>"You got this thing where?" Church asked Tucker.<p>

"Right up there." Tucker motioned to the not so fast moving blades.

"He fell in, and Tex didn't help him out, so now he has that thing." I sighed, closing my book, "It's probably an artifact that some alien's on pursuit for."

"I don't find that very likely." Church looked down at where I had been sitting.

"So... You went back in time, and didn't change... anything." Caboose spoke slowly.

"Uh, yeah." Church directed his attention away from me, "I was just like a passive observer."

"I would have tried to save your life... for me!"

"Yeah I didn't think of that." He seemed as if he were getting angry.

"You did try, didn't you?" I laughed.

"Yeah, I did. Of course you're one to know. You knew where I was every step of the way!" He glared at me, "Just what is your game?"

"I'm just a faithful soldier." I raised my arms up in surrender, "I am one of many."

He stared at me for a good moment, then focused on Tucker, "Hey, Tucker I don't think it's a good idea that you're keeping that thing."

"You're just pissed because you don't have one." It was noticeable that the teal soldier was smiling behind his helmet.

"No, you have me confused with Tex. She's been staring at you non-stop since you found that thing." He pointed out as everyone's focus was directed to Tex, except for mine... I just went back to my book.

"...That's not true." She defended herself.

"You haven't taken your eyes off it."

"Yes I have."

"Then why haven't you looked at me the entire time I've been talkin'?"

"I'm looking at you right now."

"Hu-hoh you're not!"

"I've already seen you. Not too impressed."

"Tucker, give me the sword." I extended my arm.

"No! Why should I?" Tucker noticeably took a step back.

"I'll give it back. I just want to prove a point." I kept my arm out, reading a passage of the book over again. It took about a minute before Tucker complied. I gave a sideways glance at the blade as I saw the light disappear.

"Are you doing it right?" He asked.

"Who do you take me for? I know how to use a sword." I glared at him.

"... You got to press the button."

"I'm pressing the fucking button. Just how dumb are you?" I threw it back at him.

"Very." Tex answered my question, directing her attention to me, with a hand on her hip. She's smart enough to tell what's going on, right?

I sighed, "I guess we'll wait for Crunchbite."

"Well," He played with his weapon a little longer, "I see how it is with you girls."

"No you don't~" I chimed, "You're not that smart~"

"I am too smart." He gave me a menacing glare, which I simply brushed off.

"Later in the series, sure." I covered my mouth real quick.

"What was that?"

"Um..." I laughed, nervously, "Nothing?"

"Tucker man, I still think- computer told me that thing is a very important relic, for some ancient culture." Church spoke up, "I wouldn't go swinging it around like that."

"Yeah?" He swung the sword once again, probably out of spite, "Well I think it's just a kickass piece of bling. And who're you gonna believe, me, or some super-smart stupid talking computer?"

"Hey, guys." Donut came walking in.

"What do you want, Donut?" I sighed, not looking up from my book, knowing what's coming up next.

"I just wanted to share a story that my team thought was worth sharing with you guys." Smooth. That's obviously how you start a distraction.

* * *

><p>"And that's the story of how I saved Christmas!" My ears are bleeding. It was such a poorly told story.<p>

"I did not even know the North Pole was in San Francisco." Caboose spoke in his regular, innocent voice, "This changes everything."

"Yeah, I don't think Santa's suit is a leather biker's outfit." Tucker spoke up.

"I didn't even think Santa was real." I sighed, finaly closing my book, noticing Tex was leaning over my shoulder, "Hi?" I looked up at her.

"Hey, wait a second. Why are we letting this pink guy distract us?" Church caught on. Way to go, oh leader of Blue Team.

"I'm not distracting you." Donut defended.

"Yeah you are. While we're sitting here jabbering, the reds are over there monkeying about."

"Yes!"

I stood up and started to push Donut, "Alright, then. How about you go back to your team?"

"But I don't want to." He pushed me back.

I pulled out both of my pistols, and pointed one directly at him, "Now, you're lucky I've recently remembered how to shoot a moving target, so don't consider running. How about, now, you go back to your team?"

"Y-yes ma'am." He gulped and made a run for it. I shot a warning round right next to him causing him to run even faster. I took a minute before I put the weapons back on my hips.

"Remind me not to get you mad." Tucker backed away.

"Kinda late for that." I glared at him, "You're just lucky I've only considered your death."

"Hey, calm down." Tex put a hand on my shoulder.

"Walker!" Caboose tackled me, "Why did you send Brigadier Buttercrust away?"

I felt my eye twitch as I pushed him off, "Caboose? How about you go check up on the bomb?" I spoke through gritted teeth, "Make sure it's not about to explode."

"Okay!" He cheered and ran over to where I sent him.

I took a few deep breaths, "Is there anything unimportant here?" I turned to face Church.

"Not that I can thing of..." He responded.

"Alright." I started walking, "I'm gonna go shoot some sand people."

"Hey." Tucker spoke up, "O'Malley's still out there. You're gonna get yourself killed."

I stopped in my tracks, "Damn you for being right." I looked around, and then sat on the ground, looking through my molecular compressor, "Why do I have so many fucking books in here?"

"How about you read a book instead of shooting something?" Tucker suggested.

"Books aren't calming enough." I sighed, still searching through the holographic screen, "And I know most of these ones word for word, so I won't find anything new, nor can I read them for any and all foreshadowing." I found my old Mp3 player among the many books of my collection.

"What's that?" He motioned towards the hologram. I didn't even realized he was standing over me. I let my guard down too much around these guys.

"An Ipod." I took the item out of storage, "It plays music."

"I've heard of those." He spoke in a content tone, "Isn't that some older tech?"

"Here, probably." I put one of the ear buds under my helmet and into my ear.

"Can I join you?" He sat down next to me.

"I'd rather you not." I searched through the playlist, realizing that there are a few that I swear aren't mine.

"Please?" He started to beg.

I thought about it for a good moment, "Fine, but if I get an ear infection, I'm blaming you." I handed him the other ear bud. Once I showed him how to correctly use it, I looked through the music once again and played the Mjolnir theme from Halo. It's merely instruments, so it's okay, right? I sat there in silence, listening as different sounds came into play. I remember that, in high school, we almost played this piece in band. The only reason we didn't get to play it was because our band director told us to vote, and the damn woodwinds had a solo in the other piece... I shouldn't say that. I have plenty of friends within the woodwinds. Before I even noticed, the song had changed to Take Me Out by Franz Ferdinad, and I started singing along.

"You don't have that bad of a voice." Tucker laughed, "Why don't you sing more often?"

"Well," I sighed, just realizing I had been leaning on his shoulder. Damn, I am getting too comfortable around him, "With all do respect, ninety-five percent of the songs I know are in a different language."

"True, but there's that five percent that's still English."

"Yeah." I laughed.

"You calm?"

"Why?" I glanced up at him.

"What point were you trying to make with the sword?" He held up his new weapon.

"Oh. It's bound to your genetics. No one else can use it."

"How do you know this?"

"Woman's intuition." I laughed as he continued to stare at me.

"What's the real reason?" He spoke in a stern tone, "You seem to know everything that's going on... Are you a time-traveler?"

I stifled a laugh, "And strangely, that's closer than Caboose's attempts."

"Why? What did he guess?"

"I'm a mind reader. I can see into the future with every seizure I have. I died many years ago and I'm here to warn everyone of possible future events. I ended up telling him I was magic. Poor guy believed me."

"You have seizures?"

"As far as I know I'm not epileptic. I've only had one in my lifetime." I brought my knees to my chest and rest my head.

"That's still something to worry about."

"Well, sorry that my doctor ended up dead... No one else is able to understand my case."

"Case?"

"Just leave me be." I exhaled, humming along with the music.

"Well, if you need someone to talk to, we're here for you." He put a hand on my shoulder, stood up, and started to walk away.

"What? No perverted jokes?" I yelled after him.

"Do you want one?" He asked back.

"Not really."

"I thought so." He laughed and made his way back to Church and Tex, leaving me in silence.

* * *

><p><strong>A Few Years Ago, Sim. Soldier Training Facility.<strong>

Every morning was the same routine. First, we woke up at around four a.m. (Which still seems a little early for me), then we ran about five miles worth in laps around the base (really, it feels like a warm up), afterwards, we eat breakfast, and finally, drill until lunch... sometimes dinner, depending on our behavior. Honestly, it was all too easy. I was even the first to finish our laps nearly every time! Of course, there would be an occasional person who'd end up falling, and I'd go back to make sure they were okay, but if it weren't for such human error, I would end up first every time. I often feel awful, though, because so many of these soldiers haven't, and may never, see a real war. They'll merely die for nothing but a fake one. Real war, that's what you feel proud for fighting for, because not only are you simply carrying out your mission, but you are also protecting those that-

"God dammit." I held my head, which had just hit a tree trunk. I had my eyes closed as the pain rushed through my body, but I could hear the leaves crunching in front of me. I sat still for a moment, playing dead.

"Are you alright?" It was a male voice, but none I had been familiar with, "Dangit. I needed that memory."

I sprung up and knocked him over, "What the hell do you want with my memory?" I watched him as he tried to stand back up. Poor sap. He should have the advantage here. I mean, he's in armor, while I'm just in a grey jacket with the letters UNSC in bold on the front and black sweatpants with an electric blue band down the outsides of the legs.

"Listen, I'm not here to... hurt you." He gasped for air as I put more force into his chest.

"This... is honestly the saddest excuse pf a soldier I have ever seen." I sighed, "Who trained you, because you obviously had the guts to attack me."

"I was trained by the same people as you." He reached for his helmet, but I pushed his arms to the side.

"You're not pulling that shit on me."

"What would I be able to pull in this position?"

"I don't know..." I smacked my chapped lips together, "You could pull some Iron Man shit on me."

"Those are still in the prototype stages, and are deemed 'unsafe for use in the battlefield.'"

"That doesn't make me feel better." I ground my heel further into his sternum.

"Damn." He wheezed, "You are stronger out of your armor. Cam wasn't lying."

"Wait..." I let up on him, but still pinned him to the ground, "What's your relation to Agent New Mexico?

"He's my twin." He sputtered.

I took my foot off of him and quickly held out my hand, "I am so sorry. I didn't know."

"It's...alright." He weezed, sitting up.

"No really. I-"

"You didn't know. It's alright." He laughed again.

"No. I'm fucking serious. Your sternum could be in pieces by now." I started to take calming breaths, "Mex will kill me if I hurt his baby brother."

"If anything, I'm the older brother." He glared (I think) at me through his blue and orange helmet.

"So," I finally asked, "What brings you here?"

"Well," He sighed, taking off his helmet, revealing his face as blood dripped out of him mouth. He moved his head, showing off a tattoo. _Agent Arizona: Subject Three,_ underneath the image of Arizona.

"Subject three?" I asked, looking back at him, "So both of you were burdened." I spoke in a low voice.

"As far as we know, you're the most aware of our situation." He laughed again, "And damn, it was hard to find you, since you've cut and dyed your hair."

"Eh..." I shrugged, twirling my finger through my now short, brown hair, "It was an abnormal color and started getting in the way."

"Thank God for the scars on your face and heterochromia."

"Hey." I pouted, "I don't have any scars on my face, unless you count the one along my hairline."

"There's also your hand." He held up his right hand.

"Oh yeah... The one Carolina shot." I looked at my own hand, staring at the light scar as it rest on my tan skin, "Listen, I have to get back into running." I started jogging in place, "By any chance, can you meet up with me during lunch?"

"Alright." He waved, "See you then." I ran out of the trees.

"Hey." One of the guys caught up to me, "We've already finished the first lap. What happened?"

"I'm sure by 'we,' you mean you." I laughed, "And why are you in such a rush this morning?"

"Well, this is my last day in training." He sighed, "Tomorrow I get shipped out to Sidewinder."

I felt my face sink, "It must suck to be drafted."

"Are you alright?"

"What do you mean?"

"You just fell into the forest."

"Nature called." I lied, a great big smile on my face.

"You fell pretty hard. I think needing to take a piss and tripping are two different things."

"Alright." I sighed, "Hey, Jimmy? You mind running an extra lap with me? This may be the last time we get to talk."

"Sure thing, Chele! and don't worry about not keeping contact with each other. I'll be sure to call or write a letter." He smiled... the poor guy never actually ended up contacting anyone from training.

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day<strong>

"Subject Two:" I consulted the book once again, "Agent New Mexico: Super strength and agility. Project Failed. (Committed Suicide)." I stared blankly at to pages, then continued on, "Subject Three: Agent Arizona: Invisibility and rapid cellular regeneration. Project: Success. Director's notes: He's becoming more aware of what's going on. Medics have prescribed drugs in order to reduce his curiosity."

"Poor Arizona." I mumbled, lying down next to Andy.

"Aw, quit your complainin.'" The bomb spoke up, "At least you have legs."

"Listen, Andrew." I turned my head in order to face him, "I needed a place to relax, and that's the only reason as to why I'm here... Now, if you want to piss me off, go ahead, but you'll be dismantled before you could explode." With that, he was silent, "Thank you."

"Aaaannddyy!" Caboose came running in.

"So much for that." i sighed, looking back at my book.

He waited for Tucker and Tex to finish their trip of walking slowly, "This, is Andy. Andy, this is Tex, and Tucker. Uh, the black one is Tex, and the other black one is Tucker."

"Andy's the bomb?" Tucker seemed somewhat confused.

"He prefers the term 'Explosive American.'" I glance up from my book.

"He told me all about what the Reds are up to, didn't you Andy?" All he got in return was silence, "Yes. And we talked about all our adventures. Did you know that he used to know Sheila? Isn't that right, Andy?" Even more silence.

"Hey, Andy?" I nudged the bomb, "I know I told you to be quiet, but you're making us look like Loony Toons."

"Ehm, are you guys hearing the bomb talk right now?" Tucker questioned us.

"I swear, to which ever god I'm supposed to believe in, that bomb talks." I said as I felt my eye twitch.

"Say something Andy. You are embarrassing me in front of my friends." Caboose spoke up. If I didn't know any better, then I'd think he was angry.

"Caboose, I think you're losing it." Tex finally started to talk.

"And you're not going to say the same for me?" I nodded, "That means you partially believe us, right?"

"No, you lost it years ago." She answered my question.

"Oh." I bowed my head down, then kicked the bomb.

"Hey, don't do that!" She scolded me, "You'll make it blow up!"

"I doubt that." I sighed, lying on the ground, holding the bomb above me, "God dammit, Andy. Talk!"

"Yeah, she's gone." I heard Tucker say, disappointment in his tone.


	23. I Wanna Go Home, Now

**Feel free to check out Now You've Said It, Mr. Medic by my buddy UrsalaMinor808! It's actually turning out pretty good (Then again, I've read more chapters than posted). She's an awesome writer... she just doesn't post much here. **

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><p>"You're trying to tell us the bomb can talk." Tucker spoke in disbelief.<p>

"I told you I'm not crazy!" I cheered as I sprung up into a standing position.

"Yeah, and I'm standing right here." Andy seemed somewhat irritated, "You can talk to me."

"If you could talk this whole time, then why didn't you just..." Tucker stopped talking for a moment.

"I'm sorry." I laughed, "That's not going to happen any time soon." I looked around for a moment.

"Are you... looking for something?" He turned to face me.

"She is psycho." Tex mumbled.

"I'm... not... crazy!" I tried not to yell, still looking around, "Hey Church? What's the route to Gary?"

"You can talk to him from here." Church spoke in an almost irritated tone.

"Correct." The computer agreed with the cobalt soldier.

"Yeah..." My words trailed off for a moment, "I'd like to talk to him in private."

"Private?" He tilted his head, "What ever goes on up there, we'll here from down here."

"Screw this. I'm climbing." I made sure my armor was secure and walked up to the ledge.

"She's crazy." He sighed.

"I agree." Tex scoffed.

"I wasn't talking about you Tex."

"Hey, why don't you suck my-"

"Can someone give me a boost?" I asked as I scraped my feet against the wall. I watched as Tucker took a few steps forward, "Anyone except the pervert, please."

"Isn't there something you can grab on to?" Church asked, looking at the space in front of me.

"Um..." I looked around, then extended my arm, "There's some big pipe that's barely out of my reach." I sighed as I overheard Tucker beginning to laugh, "Oh yeah. Bow chicka bow wow." I spoke in a sarcastic tone.

"Hey, I kinda like that." Tucker sounded impressed, "Mind if I borrow it?"

"Go ahead and take it." I sighed, "It's all yours."

"Sweet!" He cheered, "Hey, are you a model or famous actress? Bow-chicka-bow-wow!... Yeah. It has a nice ring to it."

"I'm starting to think this was a bad idea."

"Starting to?" Tex scoffed.

"Hey. Up yours." I glared at her, extending my middle finger, then trying to get out of the gap, "Um... Guys?"

"What now?" Church groaned.

"I don't know the best way to put this, but... I'm kinda... stuck." I ducked my head a bit.

"How'd you get stuck?" He walked forward.

"It's the chest plate. It's stuck and not about to open any time soon."

"Let's count from ten!" I overheard Caboose talking to Andy, "Ten. Nine. Eight-"

"NO!" Tex, Tucker, and I shouted.

"Duck!" Church yelled at the same time.

"Andy." I sighed, "If you want to calm down, think of this. You are in a cool river, where no one disturbs you, or calls you names. Like 'Bomby.' Or, 'The Exploding Jerk. There are sheep not the kind that don't blow up, you are happy. But not overly happy... Regular happy." I flailed my arms, "God dammit, Gamma!"

"Who the fuck's Gamma?" Tucker questioned me.

"Do you mean the gamma rays?" Church asked.

"Never mind." I growled under my breath, "Can you hurry up and get me out of here?!"

"Are you not able to slip out of your power armor?"

"... I didn't consider that... Maybe." I unlatched the chest plate and tried to slid out, "Nope, not working."

"Maybe I could help you with that." Tucker pitched in, "Bow-chicka-bow-wow."

"Tucker." I exhaled slowly, "There is such thing as a sex addiction."

"Why? Do you have it?"

"No. You have it, and it's bad for your and others' sanity." I took another relaxing exhale and fell right out of my power-suit, "God dammit." I held my head, "Oh if only I were flubber. That probably wouldn't have hurt." I watched as Tucker was about to say something, "Watch it, Lavernius."

"I wasn't even going to say anything." He defended.

I stared him down, "Yeah you were." I stood up and stretched my arms out

"The fuck it that?!" Church shouted, motioning to the stitching around my ribcage.

"Um." I looked down to where he was pointing, "An injury?"

"Oh yeah? Since when was it advised to cover an injury with strawberry jelly?"

"Uh." I flinched, "It's what they taught us at training. Right, Caboose?" I turned to face the said man in regulation blue armor.

"Eh, yeah." He looked up, noticeably happy, "There was once someone who covered their finger in katsup after getting a papercut."

"Yeah." I smiled.

"... Who the fuck is running this army?" The well known leader of blue team sighed.

"I don't know," I lied, walking back to my armor, which was still caught in the gap, "but whomever it is, you can only hope they know what they're doing." I pulled at the chest-plate, attempting to get it unstuck, "Ninety-five percent of the time, they don't."

"And it wouldn't surprise me if that actually were the case."

"Well," I tried to get my armor back, "When I get back home, I'm having a date with an Xbox and a bag of chips." I laughed, "I've had enough injury for once."

"The hell are you talking about?" Tucker questioned me.

"Nothing." I spoke in a bored tone, "... God dammit!" I shouted, kicking the hunk of metal, causing it to crash to the ground, "That's more like it." I huffed, sitting back down on the ground.

"Remind me never to get you angry." The teal soldier ducked his head slightly and barely noticeably.

"When I get home, that won't even be close to a problem." I turned my focus to him, crossed my fingers, then held them at eye level, "That's a definite."

"Don't you like it here?" Tucker asked, a little abruptly, "I mean... not like it matters, but-"

"I mean... I'll at least say goodbye... er... maybe not that, you know? Goodbyes are a little too sappy." I put on my helmet, "And that's not going to be for a while, anyway."

"Just kiss already." Church scoffed, "Quit making it complicated."

"Not like you know anything about relationships." Tex muttered.

"Charge." The faint, metallic noise came from outside.

"Shit." I sighed, "Why now?"

"What's going on now?" Tex turned to face me.

"Robot army." I sighed, "You guys go ahead and take care of it. I have to take care of something." I began to walk off.

* * *

><p>"How does it take so long to find my way here?" I walked over to the console.<p>

"It took you exactly one hour to get you." Gary spoke, unimpressed, "You've done better."

"Hey. It's not my fault." I growled under my breath, "All that's available as a food source are instant meals and bread... and if I want an oreo, I have to risk capture."

"It's not like that had been a problem before."

"That... was my first mission with Omega. I was still getting used to him." I spoke in a stuck-up attitude.

"Knock knock."

I sighed, "Who's there?"

"You are."

"You are who?" I held my breath, knowing what he was going to say.

"You are a dirty, dirty Shizno. Ha ha ha."

"I regret teaching you that."

"... The end is near. The great destroyer has arrived." He began his loop.

"Dammit." I hit the side of the panel, "I didn't break you, did I? Damn. Wyoming'll quite possibly kill me if that's the case."

"destroyer has arrived. The end is near. The great destroyer has arrived. The end is near. The great destroyer has arrived. The end is near. The great destroyer has arrived. The end is near. The great destroyer has arrived."

"Yeah yeah. I get the point." I turned to look behind me, "I'll just be sure to run right when Church gets here." I turned to face the monitor once again, "Too afraid to be in here once Crunchbite comes into play."

"-is near. The great destroyer has arrived. The end is near. The great destroyer has arrived. The end is near. The great destroyer has arrived. The end is near. The great destroyer has arrived. The end is near. The great destroyer has arrived. The end is near. The great destroyer has arrived. The end is near. The great destroyer has arrived. The end is near. The great destroyer has arrived. The end is near. The great destroyer has arrived. The end is near. The great destroyer has arrived."

"Gamma. You and I both know you can stop. You're really starting to get on my nerves."

"... Knock knock."

"What is with you and-" I felt sharp pains in my back as I fell to the floor. The last thing I happened to hear was a girly scream, but it was not of my own.


	24. Generalized Anxiety Disorder

**Many Years Ago: Freelancer**

"I barely ever get to take the time off." I smiled as I zipped up my grey jacket and walked into the bathroom, "First, let's get the exercise portion out of the way." I looked in the mirror and began to play with my long, curly, abnormally red hair, "After that, I can figure out how to get a hold of some ice cream." I looked at the amber bottle on the counter, "Take these morning and night, huh?" I picked it up and stared at its contents, "They say 'it gets better with time,' but I got nauseous for the past week because of you." After my one-sided argument with the inanimate object, I pulled a pill out and swallowed it, "I don't even know why I'm on this." I sighed, "And they still taste like rotten fruit." I set the bottle down and made my way to the locker room, jogging to keep a constant blood flow. Once I got to my destination, I went to my own locker titled _New Hampshire._

"Mornin'." York greeted me upon opening the metal door in front of me, revealing my electric blue colored armor.

"Good morning." I replied, smiling and turning to face him as I also caught sight of the lovely Carolina. You know, I used to think she was mean, stubborn, and spoiled, but she's not too bad once you get to know her.

"What are you looking at?" She snapped.

"Hey, be nice. She is younger than you." York laughed.

"I'm twenty-three." I sighed.

"Okay... A little older."

"I'm sorry, Carolina." I continued to smile as I supported my hand on the handle of the thin metal door next to me, "I'll put in a little less effort and get myself demoted, if you want."

"Don't do that!" Wash spoke up... just how long had he been there? "You're the underdog. You can't just give up!"

"Listen, Wash. You and I both know I'm not supposed to be here. Can you please respect my decision." I leaned against the locker door, forgetting that it moved as I was suddenly regaining my balance.

He tilted his head slightly, "What the hell are you talking about?"

"If I didn't tell you, who did I tell?" I watched him for a moment, "No. I had to 've told you."

"Are you going delusional?" York asked.

My attention was directed to him as I noticed Carolina was gone... probably in the training room, "No. I'm not delusional."

"Are you sick?" He continued his questioning.

"No." I sighed as I started to put my armor on.

"... Have you gone crazy?"

"What?!"

He raised his arms in defense, "It's an honest question."

"I'm... not... crazy." I felt my eye twitch as I noticed the Director walking with Agent Texas, "Dammit." I mumbled under my breath as I faced my locker in order to put on the rest of my armor.

"Did I piss you off?"

"No." I exhaled, trying to calm myself down, "I'm just going to be stuck with her thinking I'm mental."

"Who? Carolina?" Wash jumped back into the conversation.

"No. Texas."

"...Who the fuck is Texas?" They spoke in utter synchronization.

* * *

><p>"So, all in all, if I'm ever kicked out of Freelancer, or the program shuts down, I would want to lead my own squadron. I'd raise the best army in the battle!" An alarm went off as the man stood up, "Sorry. I have to go." He started to walk away.<p>

"Bye Florida!" I waved at him as he turned around, waved back, and continued to walk away, "... There is no way that man is straight."

"You said that about Oregon," Lazerus glanced up from his computer, "Of course, that was until he said he in fact does like girls."

"Bisexual is not considered straight." I pouted, "And it was fair to make that accusation since he was dating one of YOUR medics."

"You say that as if I'm chief medic." He continued to type away, not even looking at me.

"Are you not?" I tilted my head, slightly.

He held up three fingers, "Three more people have to die before I get there." He took off his glasses and rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"Maybe you should get contacts." I sighed, "I did."

"They're bifocals." He looked up at me, "I only use them for reading, and besides, you wouldn't take the lasik."

"Who's crazy enough to allow a laser into their eyes?" I laughed.

"Who's crazy enough to spend their entire day off in the mess hall?" He closed the laptop.

"Mi dispiace per essere cosígolosi." (Sorry for being gluttonous. [Italian]).

"What?"

"Non importa." I smiled, "So, how's the research going along?"

"I'd rather not talk about that in public." He sighed.

"Qualcuno ha paura del grande, cattivo regista?" (Is someone afraid of the big, bad director?)

"Tú estás paniendo de los nervious." (You are getting on my nerves. [Spanish]) He mumbled.

"Wrong language, sweetie." I sighed, leaning into the nonexistent back of the bench, but still managing to stay somewhat upright. After that whole epidemic, I just rest my head in one hand and picked up the sandwich in front of me with another. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw someone sit down next to me, "Hi North." I didn't even need to look over.

"Hey Hampshire." He spoke in his usual, composed tone.

"Where's Wash and York?" I looked up at him, "Heck. Where's your sister for that matter?"

"South is probably doing something else while York and Wash are still in line." He took off his helmet.

"Are you not at all worried about what trouble South's in right now?"

"If she gets in trouble, it's her own fault... I'll look for her in a bit."

"I guess everyone has their limits." I exhaled, giving off a short laugh.

"So, how's you're break day going?"

"We've spent it here." Lazerus answered for me.

"I didn't know medics can get a break."

"I'm not on break persay... If I'm needed, I'll be paged, but I have a little bit of free time, since the Director's too busy to assign missions to people."

"And why do you say that?"

"Well." He gave a short laugh, "You guys did recover the Sarcophagus a week and a half ago. He probably has plans for that thing."

"Hey." I placed my hand on top of the laptop in front of me, "Can we talk about research now?"

"You gotta stop that." He growled under his breath, "I'll talk to you about that later."

"Hey, the more that listen in the better." I smiled, "We may even get someone to join in."

"Well guess what?" He gave me a stern look, "The more that listen in, the more likely we are in the nut house."

"Is this your weird conspiracy that a person can jump from one universe to the other?" North spoke up, releasing the tension.

"...Oh." I said in realization, "So I told you... not... Wash." I turned to face the table, supporting my head with my hands, "I'm sorry. I've been having some amnesiac moments the past week."

"And you haven't mentioned this why?" Lazerus leaned his head against his hand, "I told you that, if anything odd happens, you have to let me know."

"It's not odd, though." I laughed, "I have G.A.D. and get forgetful under stress."

"What's G.A.D.?" North asked.

"Generalized anxiety disorder." Lazerus and I spoke in sync.

"Although," Laz spoke up after a moment, "you don't really show any symptoms... and if you're on meds, I'm going to have to register it."

"Nah." I laughed, "Don't need 'em."

"Then how the heck have you not had anxiety attacks?"

"Someone saw something about anxiety?" Wash laughed, sitting next to Lazerus as York sat next to him.

"Yeah." He sighed, "Lovely Michele here's trying to explain to me how she has G.A.D. and isn't on medications."

"What's G.A.D.?" The younger man tilted his head, "And who's Michele?"

"First off," I sighed, lifting my head up, "it is possible to have such a minor anxiety disorder and not live your life on meds."

"Coming from the one who was working on forensics." You could see the anger in Laz's eyes, "I spent two years in medical school. I think I know what I'm doing."

"Wait." York piped, "We're trusting our lives with someone who hasn't even graduated from medical school?"

"Let me sum this up lightly." He sighed, "You're trusting your lives with people whom have no medical experience. I'm one of your best bets." He turned his attention to me once again, "Now tell me, how are you sitting here, appearing sane-"

"That can be questionable."

"... without medications."

I gave another short laugh, "Adopt healthy eating habits, limit caffeine and sugar, exercise regularly, avoid alcohol and nicotine, and plenty of sleep."

"Sixty percent of those you are currently failing to demonstrate." Delta appeared.

"Because nothing here makes me anxious." I leaned back, only realizing what had just happened once I was on the ground, "Delta?!" I shot straight up.

"Am I needed of some sort of assistance?" The green figure flickered.

"Umm..." I looked at Lazerus.

"Nothing here makes you anxious, you say?" The medic scoffed, "Maybe you should follow your five steps better."

"That's not even funny." I glared, "I didn't expect that until later in the time-line." I took a few deep breaths, "Dammit. I got to go." I started to walk away.

"Wait!" Wash yelled after me, "You still haven't told me who Michele is?!"

"You're a fucking idiot." I managed to overhear York before I made it out of the cafeteria alive and made my way to my room.

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day<strong>

"You guys might want to stand back." I heard a vague, female voice as I felt the pain rush throughout my body.

"Why should I? She's a corpse." Another voice went off, this time male.

"Well, it's your funeral. She tends to be a little... volatile at this point."

"Listen to me." The voice went off, "You've obviously gone nutty." The sound of footsteps came closer as I felt a force hit my head, "See. Dead."

"Oohalgh." I groaned, trying to ignore the ringing that now went through my head.

"Holy shit! She's a zombie!"

"Is that even possible?" A new voice came into play.

"Sure it is. I mean... I am a ghost."

"You still want to risk your life?" The voice started to become more clear.

"Not really." The man sighed as the footsteps started growing quiet, "But I'm not saying your right. I just... still have to find Caboose."

I opened my eyes and the nearly blinding lights hit my retinas as I could feel my eyeballs roll into their intended position, "Dammit. What happened." I mumbled, sitting up, flinching as sharp pains went through my back.

"Alright." The female voice went off as I caught sight of a shiny, black figure (Really... they're all balls of colors in my eyes), "Damn. Where's that medic when you need 'im." She waved her hand in front of my eyes and retreated.

"You act like you're afraid of her." The light blue figure in the distance scoffed.

"Let's just say that she kicked someone's head off on a mission." She sighed, "My name is Allison." She spoke slowly and motioned toward the teal figure, "That is Tucker." She then pointed (?) at the light blue character, "And that... is an asshole. Don't bother with him."

"Tex?" I mumbled, trying to focus on what was in front of me, "I know who the fuck you are. Why are you treating me like a child." I hunched over, feeling as if I were about to vomit.

"... Well, that's a different outcome." She stood there for a moment, "I wish I had a medical kit for you... Do your wounds infect?"

"Heck if I know." I tried to stand up, but ended up falling back down, "There are still gaps in my memory from Freelancer."

"The hell are you talking about?" Church yelled.

"Not about you!" Tex yelled back.

"Did you two get into an argument?" I asked.

"He's just too clingy." She sighed.

"He did try to recreate the one he loved the most." I cringed at the new surge of pain, "You didn't happen to stitch up the wounds, did you? It takes about five minutes for my blood to become gelatinous."

"And longer for you to wake up." She scoffed, "And did you not hear the part about us not having a med. kit? Red team took the only two we had with them."

"All the way to Blood Gulch." I groaned, trying (and finally succeeding) at standing up, "I may as well just deal with pain a little longer."

"Don't push yourself, kid." She started walking towards Church.

"Will do." I gave a faulty salute as I noticed Tucker start to make his way toward me.

"How'd you pull that trick off?" He laughed.

"What trick?" I took a step forward, resulting into him catching me.

"That whole 'rise from the dead' thing?"

"... You can let me go, now." I sighed.

"And risk you falling? Usually I'd be fine with that, but you're wounded."

"Let go of me." I huffed under my breath.

"Alright." He dropped me as I fell face first into the ground, "... You alright?"

"Yup... Just lost my motor skills." I groaned.

"Need help?"

"No... I'm sure this has happened before." There was silence for a moment, "Now would be a good time to remember my past... you know... since I go inactive whenever those randomly happen." He pulled me up and slung my arm around his shoulders, "Please put me back on the ground."

"Mmm... How about not." He laughed.

"Oh how I've wanted to drop kick you for the past while. You just gave me another reason." I looked around, "Where the hell is Caboose?"

"That's probably where Tex and Church have gone."

"... Over there and down the ramp." I pointed.

"And where is that?"

"That just so happens to be where Church and Bitchpants McCrabby happen to be."

"Alright, then." He gave a short laugh as we started to walk, "Are you sure?"

"Just shut up and go."

* * *

><p>You can choose whether or not to believe me, but it took half an hour to get to where we were supposed to go. Most of this was because my brain couldn't decide whether or not my legs should work... and there's no way in hell that the pervert I ended up with is carrying me.<p>

"Whoa, that thing's breath smells like infected cheese on a hotplate." Church coughed.

"Largh, blargh!" The alien shouted.

"I don't think he liked that." Tex spoke up.

"Whoa, man, what is that stench?" Tucker was alarmed as I moved my hand to the side of my helmet in order to close the vents.

"Hargh." The elite went off.

"Is a skunk juggling dead hamsters in here?"

"Largh."

"It smells like old yogurt,"

"Largh, whargh, wharharhrgh."

"Did you eat and then throw up a can of trash?"

"Hnnk!"

"That's exactly what he said right before he bit me."

"Largher, hnnk! Hrarhrh."

"Hey. I'm sorry I'm not dead. Just come a little closer so I can give you your kumuppins!" I took a step forward, landing once again on my face.

"Hnk!" The... thing... mocked me.

Tucker pulled me up again, "How about we take a break from falling. Is that too much to ask?"

"Yes." I huffed, dropping to the ground... this time in a sitting position.

"There's no need to be a stubborn bitch." He huffed under his breath.

"I think, I think blargh means, me, or, apples." Caboose started, "Guys, Apples must be the name of his cat! Quick, quick, is- is Apples stuck in a tree? I will call the fire department."

"Mister Huge Alien, do you understand what we are saying?" Church began to talk.

"Wharrgh!" The Elite responded.

"I have no idea whether or not that means yes or no."

"Totally blows away your vica versa theory." Caboose made an attempt to comfort his leader, "Sorry."

"You two are retarded." Tucker intervened, "You're not gonna be able to figure out an alien language by experimentation. Give it up."

"You don't know that." Church protested.

"You don't even know how they talk. What if their language isn't entirely verbal. It could be part telepathic, or via smells. Whoh."

"If it's via smells, then you should already be fluent." I gave a short laugh, "Hey Caboose. Can I see your gun for a moment?"

"What do you want with his gun?" Tucker asked as the regulation blue armored soldier handed me his weapon, "You have three of your own."

"Thank you." I took the gun, ignoring the teal armored man. I pulled out the cartridge and hit it against the ground as a few crayons fell out, "There." I placed the whole thing on the ground, "Quit your yammerin' and try to teach it Engrish."

"You really are bad at English." He laughed.

"It's a joke." I sighed, lying down on my stomach, motionless as I somehow managed to fall asleep with a lot of talking in the background.

* * *

><p><strong>I must appologize now. I've been working on this chapter for HOURS... It was about time that I ran out of inspiration.. sorry if you wanted a longer chapter. ;-;<strong>


	25. Complaint Box

**Hey! First off, I want to apologize for not posting... and be sure to check out Ursalaminor808's writings. She deserves a lot of love for what she does. :)**

* * *

><p><strong>Many Years Ago, Freelancer<strong>

I was just walking through the halls as I saw just a random man out of his armor working at a little table.

"Hey." I approached the said man, "What're you doing?"

"Hey." He responded, "Do you know the meetings that happen every once in a while where we get nothing done and all people do is complain?"

"Actually, yeah. I've previously been one of those complainers, and nothing's ever done in order to resolve those problems."

"Well," He tossed what I said aside, "I've made a complaint box so that we can get rid of the meetings all together."

"Yeah..." I looked at the box, "That will not help at all."

"No, I think it will. You haven't heard my second part of the strategy." He picked up what looked like a stack of small papers, "I have these complaint templets. People just fill these out and don't have to worry about expressing themselves."

I looked at the papers he was holding, "Those are MadLibs." I spoke, dead-panned.

"No wait. Hear me out. Let's fill one out and I'll show you how easy it is." He took out a pen, "First, I am going to need a noun."

"Coffee maker."

"Verb?"

"Broken."

"Okay. Coffe maker broken. A plural noun?"

"Bathrooms."

"Verb?"

"Need."

"Noun."

"Toilet paper."

"Adjec-"

"Frustrating."

"Alright. Sign and date, so it's official. And," He handed me the paper, "how does that look?"

"The coffee maker dragon is the most frustrating dragon of all. They have broken toilet paper for skin and need hot bathrooms to kill you."

"And there's also the little dragon doodle in the corner..." He watched as I glared daggers at him, "Just put it in the box."

"Alright." I huffed, putting the paper in the thin slit of the box as it made a whirring sound, "... Complaint box is a paper shredder, isn't it."

"That's a streamlining thing. It'll save time later."

"That's it, I'm done." I raised my arms in surrender and started to walk away.

"We have to shred 'em later anyways."

"... What was with that?" Lazerus questioned me.

"Fuckin' cheat complaint box." I growled, "Played just about like that freakin' RT short."

"Yeah." He laughed, "With the MadLibs? I remember that one."

"Yeah... those things are worth more laughs when it's... I don't know... fake!"

"Wow, no need to be persnickety."

"Fine." I sighed, "Let's go fix the coffee maker."

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day<strong>

"Tucker, the enormous alien doesn't speak our language. Speaking slowly is not gonna help." Church's voice rang. My eyes fluttered open as I was propped against a pillar. I tried to stand up, but my legs gave out once again, "Dammit." I huffed at I reached for the button in order to release my helmet. Once that was found, it took many different attempts and approaches in order to get the darn thing off. I was then holding it firmly in my hands, taking notice of the concave gash that was riddled with blood. I took one of my gloves off and carefully located as to where my head hand been struck. I retreated my hand, taking a look at the congealed substance, and put the glove back on, later attempting to move the metal back into its original place, but I ended up failing my every attempt.

"You alright, kid?" Tex knelt down in front of me.

"Yeah." I sighed, looking down at my beaten up helmet, "The rest of my armor's gonna be like this, huh?"

"Nah. Believe it or not, just the helmet... Which was a relief because we didn't want you unconscious, out of armor, and around Tucker." She gave a faulty laugh, "And even I can't fix that. We've tried... You're gonna have to put a machine to that."

"I doubt it." I sighed, taking another attempt with a little more effort as it moved just a little more, "Hey, Tex? Can I ask you something?"

"Alright."

"... If whenever I 'die' I forget, then how come I am still able to remember pretty well?"

"Well," She sighed, "Currently, that is beyond reasons of my comprehension, but I do have some theories, which would also explain you being able to survive that rocket launcher incident."

"I would've survived it, anyways."

"You know what I mean."

"...Was it Omega?" I spoke abruptly, looking up at her.

"Pardon?" She tilted her head slightly to the side, like a confused puppy.

"I mean... back in Blood Gulch, he had access to my brain. Maybe he fixed something."

"Oh yeah?" She laughed, "And maybe he took the furniture along with him."

"For the last time, I'm perfectly sane." I giggled.

"The last time you got a cat scan, they found a part of your brain pound into a mush. You are not perfectly sane."

"You know, you're a little rude." I puffed up my cheeks and pouted.

"And that right there makes you look like a child. C'mon you're about what... twenty-five by now."

I looked back at my helmet, the frustration allowing me to move the metal back into position, "I don't quite remember anymore."

"Okay, I give up. All this guy says is honk honk." Church started getting upset.

"Well," Tex turned around, "have you ever considered that his name is Honk Honk?"

"Glwargh?" The elite went off.

"No, that's not it." I sighed, "It is a very intricate language. Takes years for the average person to get it down."

"Wait. You understand this thing?" Tucker was staring at my direction.

"It's an official language under UNSC jurisdiction." I laughed, "Took me a while to understand the patterns, even with my photographic memory."

"If it's an official Freelancer thing, then how come Tex doesn't understand it?" He tilted his head, just like Tex did earlier.

"Hey, I know english. There's no need for me to take that much time to learn a whole other language." She snapped.

"... Even so," I refused to allow a whimper of fear escape my lips, "I never said it was a Freelancer thing. Freelancer derives from the UNSC, not the other way around."

"I thought the Freelancers were guns for hire... not official soldiers."

"Well then, be happy you're on the less hellish side of it." I laughed, setting my helmet down next to me.

"Glwargh hurnk." The alien went off once again.

"Well honk to you too, you blarger."

"Hey, big alien, is your name Honk Honk?" Church started to question the thing.

"Lwargh."

"Hey, wait a second. I think blarg means yes. Am I right, does blarg mean yes?"

"Blarg."

"Holy shit! Blarg means yes! He just said yes, blarg means yes! I speak alien!"

"Yeah... I'm not going to repeat anything I just said." I kept a fairly blank expression across my face.

"What? Do you expect me to listen to everything you guy say?" Church started, "You know, there's a-"

"fine line between not listening and not caring? Do you feel as if you walk that line every day?" I grinned.

"... How did you-"

"Church, I know a lot of thing that are going on... just... be happy that I haven't quite killed you guys, yet."

"... W-wait. What do you mean yet?"

"Yeah." Tucker spoke up once again, "And how the hell do you know what's going on?"

"Trust me, you do not want to know." I grunted, trying to stand up once more, barely able to stay upright as I focused my balance solely on the pillar next to me, "... Actually... I don't fell like talking about it." I mumbled as I picked my helmet up and stared into the visor, "Just disregard everything I've said previously."

"You know, we would be able to disregard it if you didn't try to avoid it every time it comes up!" He lashed out at me, "Just tell us what the heck is going on already so we don't have to feel concerned!"

I stood there for a moment, putting on my helmet... because I didn't want them to see me cry as my breath became short, but remained silent. I turned around and began to walk, making sure there was some sort of wall able to support me.

"God dammit!" He yelled again, "What the hell is wrong with her?!"

"Hey. Maybe if you weren't so centered in yourself, she''d probably tell you what's wrong." I heard Tex speak as I turned the corner as collapsed against the wall, making sure no one can see me. I don't belong here. I know I don't... but no one had the right to remind me. All I want... I just want to go home. I just wanna see my family, my friends, heck... I could settle for my roommate. I just can't take this anymore.


	26. Filler

**So, fun fact of the day, Michele is a French and Italian name that means "God like." I just discovered that today and thought it was freakin' awesome... and coincidental. :) ... but in the French/Italian form, it's intended as a guy's name (The American form being Michael) 0-0... but how we're using it is like the Michelle (yes... evidently adding one L makes a difference.) Just thought that was an interesting bit.**

* * *

><p>"Hey." Tucker knelt down in front of my collapsed body.<p>

"What do you want?" I growled... almost like Maine as me sadness was quickly transferred into anger.

"... I just wanted to say... I'm sorry." He looked at me the best he could through the helmets, "I'm sure that whatever the reason is, it's probably hard for you to remember whatever it is... and I shouldn't be an ass about it." He sat down next to her.

"I never said anything about having to remember." I watched him for a moment.

"Uh... sure you did." He tried to convince me as I brought my legs to my chest.

"Tex opened her mouth, huh?" I mumbled.

"No. Of course not."

I leaned my head on his shoulder, feeling warm tears streak my face, "You know, it's been about seven years... Seven, fucking, years since I've last seen my family... How much has she told you?"

"Just that you've practiced psychic abilities and you were taken from your family by the UNSC. Ever since then, you've been looking for them." He relaxed a bit, allowing me to get just a little more comfortable.

"Well, remind me to thank her." I sighed not noticing the smile that had been written on my face.

* * *

><p>"How did that happen?" A voice went off.<p>

"I don't know." Another voice laughed, "Maybe she got too comfortable."

"I wonder what she looks like asleep." The first went of again.

"I'm more surprised she's not screaming this time."

My eyes stayed closed and I turned to lie on my side, "Danny. Michael. Arrêter d'être jokers et laissez -moi dormir." (Danny. Michael. Stop being jokers and let me sleep [French])

"The fuck did she say."

"Don't look at me. I don't speak Arabic."

"You of all people should know that's not Arabic." I wrapped my arms around what seemed like a wall, "And since when did you speak english?"

"Does she think we're someone else?"

"Probably."

Upon noticing that the voices weren't in fact whom I had assumed, I opened my eyes to see a man in cobalt armor standing in front of me.. and when I turned my head, I saw another in teal (?) armor sitting next to me as my arms were wrapped around him. I then shot straight up, "Sorry." I muttered, feeling the red flush across my face.

"Well, now she's awake." Tucker laughed.

"... Who the fuck did you think we were?" Church questioned me.

I looked around for a bit, then remembered the impossibility, "I'm sorry. I don't know what you're... talking about." I lied.

"Alright then." The cobalt marine sighed, "You two get up. We still have an alien to deal with."

* * *

><p><strong>I apologize for the shortness in length. I just needed a filler as I try to think of how to continue this story.<strong>


	27. Rememberance

**Many Years Ago: Freelancer.**

"This tastes like dirt." I mumbled under my breath, "When did Freelancer lose their funding for the semi-appetizing meals?"

"Well, there's about fifty soldiers they have to feed." Lazerus spoke up, not looking up from his book, "And about thirty medics and however many pilots there are. I'm sure there's someone I'm forgetting something." He looked up at me, "You alright? You seem a little anxious."

"Yeah..." I muttered, "Omega's just a bit quieter than I imagined."

"You realize he can hear you, right?"

"Yeah, but at least he's better than Sigma." I moved the 'food' away from me and rest my head on the table.

"I agree with you there." He laughed, "You've also been telling him to be quiet, though. He's probably pissed."

"Yeah. I'm getting a lot of anger."

"Maybe you should patch things up between you two. You are stuck with each other for a while."

"Yeah, yeah." I groaned, "I'll get to that later." I lifted my head up and rest it on my hand, "You know, in Red Versus Blue, Omega was given to Tex in order to make her more aggressive... How come without him, she still seems virtually the same?"

"Maybe making her more aggressive wasn't actually the Director's goal." He picked up the soda can next to him and took a drink before setting it down, "... Just maybe..." His voice trailed off.

"Just maybe, what?"

"Nothing." He stood up, "I got to get going. I suggest you fix everything with Omega as soon as possible. He's gonna end up hating you." He started walking away.

"He's gonna hate me, anyways!" I yelled after him, "He's the embodiment of hate!" I watched as he gave me a back-handed wave, "Why the hell did the Alpha have to fragment." I muttered under my breath as I resisted the urge to scratch my still healing skin.

"May I say something," Omega appeared in front of me, "or are you just going to tell me to shut up again?"

"Go ahead." I sighed, honestly a little curious as to what the fragment was going to say, but I didn't show interest."

"You can be a real bitch sometimes." He laughed, knowing that annoyed me.

"Listen, you little twit." I reached out to grab him, but my just went through him.

"Can't catch me." He held his hand at the sides of his head, and I could only assume he had been sticking his tongue at me as he backed away."

"Don't be an ass about it!" I yelled as I threw my meal tray at him. It ended up going through him, hitting none other than Agent Maine in the back of the head as the mud-like consistency now dripped down his face.

"This is going to be amusing." The AI laughed maniacally as he disappeared... Maine now towering over me.

"I... I can explain." I stammered. I don't remember much after that. Perhaps it was too much trauma that I had chosen to forget it.

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day<strong>

"Church! Chuuurch, hey Church!" Tucker had been looking for Church as I had one of Lazerus's books in my hand. Boy, that guy can write. I found like twenty books that he wrote... only notes... only in Italian. Still kinda wondering when, where, and how he managed to pull that one off.

"I'm right behind you, dumbass." Church spoke up... Is it bad that I didn't even notice him? Well, I am reading. That can be my excuse.

"Oh. Hey Church, do you have a knife?" Tucker proceeded to ask.

"No. That's a weapon dude, ask Tex... Or maybe Walker, for that matter. She has what... three guns visible. She's bound to have a knife."

"Four visible guns." I sighed, "Shot gun and rifle on the back, two pistols on the hips."

"Do you have a knife?" The leader of blue team questioned me, as if I were a child.

"I haven't sharpened it in about... two months. Either way, it's really rusty. I haven't had the time to clean it." I closed the book and set it down on my lap as I watched the two soldiers of blue.

"Just... go ask Tex." Church sighed.

"She said she had something to take care of." Tucker said, "Girl stuff, I think."

"Huh? Like what?"

"I don't know. I stopped asking questions after 'Girl stuff.'"

"What're you guys doin'?"

"We're gonna teach the alien how to speak English."

"How're you gonna do that?"

"People learn English all the time. It aren't that hard."

"Please." I scoffed, "I had to learn English, and even I know that's improper grammar. You're just disproving your point."

"Maybe you should try learning his language." Church suggested, seeing my point.

"Fuck that." Tucker kept to his plan, "We got here first, and that makes this a colony. Earth colony, Earth language."

"Tucker, there's thousands of languages spoken on Earth." Church spoke with disappointment in his tone.

"Tucker, you are a fuckin' imbecile." I said at the same time as Church.

"Fine. I see how it is." Tucker began to walk away.

"God, I hope I didn't break him." I sighed as I opened my book once again and leaned against the wall behind me, "I should get use to it. Things are gonna get off-script every once in a while."

* * *

><p><strong>A Few Centuries Ago: Massachusetts<strong>

"Damn. You've gotten yourself a pretty nasty fever." A feminine voice called out as I slowly opened my eyes.

"Can you please just let me go to school?" My voice made a wheezing sound as I felt dull pops in my lungs.

"Hey, as of now your health means more than your education." She stood up as she walked up to the microwave in the small apartment we had been sharing.

"But we have a test today." I whimpered, "I'll be a failure if I miss that."

"Listen. You're nineteen. If one test holds you back so much, then you'll just have to retake a year. I'll even help pay for your tuition." She smiled as she bit into her breakfast burrito and headed to the door.

"Wait, Alzea." I spoke up as she was just about to leave.

"Yes?"

"Could you bring some soup on your way back?"

She laughed, "Alright. Don't overwork yourself, kay?"

"Okay." I sunk into the couch I had been lying on.

"Alright. Get better." She smiled as she closed the door behind her.

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day<strong>

I opened my eyes as I saw Tucker being beaten by the alien. I sighed and went into the fetal position and felt hot tears stream down my face and neck, "Why did I ever forget that?"

"How about you disappear!" I heard a voice scream, but I knew better. I knew it was only a memory.

"Wh-why would you say that?" A weaker voice went off.

"I gave you more that you could ask for! I taught you the English you need to know! I introduced you to my friends!"

"Yeah?! And when you weren't able to pay off your rent, I gave you a place to live." There was the sound of keys and heavy footsteps, "Don't bother coming home." The voice sounded choked up and shaky... and it was then that I remembered... that was my voice.

I reached into the top of my chest-plate and pulled out a chain. At the end of the chain, I found the old, almost rust-free key that I remembered had belonged to my apartment long abandoned by now, "I'm so sorry, Alzea." I clutched to the piece of metal, as if it would end up bringing me home.

"Hey." Tucker started to talk to me, "Maybe, ow, you can, ow, get this alien off of me."

"Well, someone doesn't like the attention." I stood up, putting the key back behind my armor. I took a few steps and kicked the alien off of him, "Quite honkin' him, you blargin' honker." I mumbled as it cowered. Shit, did I hurt it? Let's just hope I didn't kill it.

"Thanks." Tucker wheezed as he stood up.

"Yeah. Just... take it easy." I sighed as I opened my book once again, still standing because I didn't want to risk falling asleep.

"Yeah, yeah. That thing attacked me first." He huffed, looking over my shoulder.

"That's only because you have his artifact, which by the way, now only you can use."

"That's his fault. If he wanted it, he should've gotten here first." He let out a loud exhale, "What the heck does that thing even say?"

"Subject Five." I sighed, "Agent Vermont. I think her real name's Karen Reichel. She's a little younger than me. Ability: Death Touch... whatever that means. Project: Success. Director's notes: She claims that she's able to see Subject Nine and has befriended her. It is necessary to keep her at arms reach."

"And who's Subject Nine?" He questioned.

"Give me a moment." I huffed as I flipped a few pages, "Here we go. Subject Nine: Agent Maryland. Ability: Invisibility. Project: Failure. Director's notes: Although she was infact able to become invisible, she had no control of her ability and disappeared shortly after the pills took affect."

"Sounds like fun." Tucker laughed, "How were you guys able to tolerate experimentation?"

"... We didn't know." I closed the book, "I had a friend that was the first to figure out what was going. I was the one he got samples from in order to figure out what was going on."

"So, what is your ability?" He spoke abruptly as he sat down and I hesitantly followed.

"I'm willing to tell you, but I don't want you to see me differently or tell anyone."

"Got it."

I opened up the book and opened it to the first page, "Subject Zero: Michele (New Hampshire) Walker. Abilities: Undying, Strength, Greater Memory Capacity. Project: failed. Director's notes: She ended up knowing too much. She used her abilities and rebelled along with Agents Texas and New York. She must be quarantined." I closed the book again.

"That explains that 'coming back to life' thing earlier." He laughed.

"You cannot tell anyone." I growled, "If you do, I won't feel sorry for what will happen afterwards."

"I promise." He sighed, "... But that's gotta be tough."

"How so?" I lied down on the ground as I watched the light blue sky above us.

"Well... all of it. Just the experimentation part is enough. I couldn't imagine suddenly having an ability and afraid people will see me as a monster."

"There were some people that figured it out and committed suicide." I sighed, watching a vulture glide through the air, "I don't find it as that bad. I just see it as an... opportunity in order to protect those I care about."

He lied down too, getting a little closer than he probably should, "Well, with that way of thinking, maybe you'll be able to find the light in the darkest moments."

I felt a smile creep up across my face as I closed my eyes, "Yeah. Maybe you're right.

* * *

><p><strong>Credit for Alzea Reclaimer goes to AnonymousZGirl<strong>


	28. We Used to Not Get Along

**Many Years Ago: Freelancer**

I had been assigned to fight with two people. Brothers, actually. They were assigned the names Arizona and New Mexico. Arizona was a more quiet and intellectual type as he observed me while we waited for the okay in order to start. New Mexico was more of a treat than his brother. He seemed almost all brawn and little brain.

"Omega, can you please help me out?" I asked of my AI.

"I don't know." He yawned, "I think it'd be hilarious if you ended up dying."

"I don't think there are live rounds in the arena." I sighed, knowing I'm not going to be able to persuade hatred into doing something kind.

"That would be pretty funny if there were." He scoffed, "It's possible to die from hand to hand combat. Maybe I can make my bets on that horse."

"Please tell me the Director wasn't a gambler." I muttered under my breath.

"Round begin." F.I.L.L.S.'s voice went off as New Mexico charged after me. I dodged a few as I tried to learn what his fighting patterns were. As soon as I figured it out and tried to strike, he changed his approach, causing me to fly in the air and land on my back.

"Holy shit! That actually worked." The man cheered, "Thanks, man." He turned to face his brother.

"It's not over yet." The more timid voice of Arizona went off, "Don't drop your guard just yet."

"Omega." I growled as I stood up, "You're gonna hafta help me."

"No way. I'm already winning my bet." He laughed, "You're already spitting out blood."

"Well, this is going to be useless." I brought my guard back up as I noticed no one has charged me. They were waiting for me. I quickly ran toward Arizona, realizing that he was the brains of this battle. I took a swing, and hit the man in the head as he dropped to the ground, and used his legs to trip me.

"Round one over. Point Arizona and New Mexico."

"Well, this will be interesting." I sputtered as I felt the thick, warm fluid drip down my chin, "Omega, you really need to help me."

"How long does it take for a human to bleed to death?" He questioned as he had obviously been searching through my head, "I mean... it takes a while."

"Quit trying to kill me." I snarled.

"No, you hit the guy in the head. There's blood dripping out of his armor."

I looked at where he had been talking about, "Ah. I see." I muttered.

"And that blow should've killed him." He sighed, "But then again, you're not in good shape either."

"Round begin." Again, New Mexico was the one to charge as Arizona stayed behind. This time, I didn't wait for the man to throw a swing as I kicked him in the chest, causing him to fly around twenty feet as he fell to the ground.

"Well, that's smarts." He huffed as he tried to stand back up. I went after Arizona again. Instead of remaining stationary, I jumped in the air and kicked him in the head, knocking off his helmet. There was a lot of blood that dripped from his hairline and dripped off of his chin, but there was no proof of puncture or wounds.

"How the-" I had let my guard down as I felt an arm wrapped around my neck. The hold was too tight for escape, and the next thing I know, I'm unconscious.

* * *

><p>I opened my eyes as a blinding light came into sight. I cringed at the pain as the light slowly went away.<p>

"Hey, can you hear me?" A hazy voice went off, but I didn't have to think in order to recognize it.

"Lazerus?" I groaned, "Please tell me I'm not in the med bay."

"Alright, I won't tell you." He laughed.

"Well, that's a disappointment."

"At least you're alive."

I sat up, taking notice of the stitches on my lips, "How the hell did I end up in here?"

"You don't remember?" He shined the light back in my eyes, "Perhaps you've repressed the memory."

"I wouldn't doubt it." I sighed as Omega appeared in front of me.

"Shall I give you a recap?" The AI laughed.

"I'd rather you not." I sighed, trying to get out of the bed, but collapsing immediately.

"Are you alright?" Lazerus helped me back onto the bed.

"Yeah..." I lied back down, "How long until I'm able to walk on my own."

"Well." He spoke hesitantly, "Arizona broke your ankle... and it's surprising that you were able to fight during round two, but we'll just have to wait until it heals. Kid you not, I honestly don't know how long it will take."

"Well, shit." I huffed.

"What I suggest is that you and Omega spend this time to get along." He smiled.

"How about no." Omega and I said at the same time.

"If I have to, I will leave you two alone until you get along." He glared at us, "And Michele, that goes double for you. I may be able to break that AI and put it back together, but I may or may not dissect you while you're conscious." And with that, he spun around and walked to the door, "And Omega, if you don't behave, I'll find something special just for you." He walked out of the door and closed it behind him.

"He doesn't actually mean that, does he?" I gulped.

"There's no way of telling."

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day<strong>

"Blargh blargh blargh, blargh." The alien started explaining the situation.

"Then after we crossed the Burning Plains of Honka Hill, we're gonna reach the Freezing Plains of Blarganthia." Andy translated.

"The Burning Plains are next to the Freezing Plains? I bet there's some pretty wet plains in between." Caboose spoke abruptly.

"You guys realize that I'm fluent in this language, right?" I sighed, planting an arm on my hip, "The bomb wasn't your last chance."

"Alright." Andy laughed, "If you're so fluent, then prove it."

"Blargh honk honker blargin' larger." I said with easy.

"Well, you don't have to be a bitch about it." He huffed as I replied with a snarl.

"This is so dumb." Tucker complained, "I'm not doing this."

"Hey, news flash, you don't have a choice. You're the one that picked up the sword and locked it to yourself." Church reminded the marine in teal... aquamarine? Seriously, what the fuck is that color?

"I know! And I'm so use to picking up things, and not letting them get attached... I'm talking about women."

"If you make it out of this alive, I swear I'm gonna fucking kill you." I spoke, dead-panned.

"Don't worry Tucker. We're not gonna send you alone." Tex attempted to calm him down.

"You're coming with me Tex?" There was hope in his tone.

"Me? Hell no! This is the first thing you wimps have done that actually sounds dangerous."

"Walker?" He looked at me, quite possibly with pleading eyes.

"I'll think about it." I sighed, "But as much as I may hate to admit it, I may be incapable for battle."

"Well I'm not goin' with Church. That guy's a worse fighter than I am."

"Well, you're in luck then," The cobalt soldier spoke in a pleased tone, "because I'm not goin' either."

"What? Then who?" He turned to face Caboose, "No fuckin' way. I'm not goin' with him."

"Oh, oh, oh. I hope we meet a Cleric along to way." Caboose practically cheered, "None of us know how to heal."

"Blarhun?" The alien went off once again.

"He says he's a healer." Andy translated.

"Oh good." It was easy to hear the smile in the regulation blue's voice.

"Caboose, they eat there wounded." I spoke with a concerned voice.

"Just like chiropractors." Caboose responded to what I had to say.

"Maybe I should end up goin' with you guys." I was getting worried, now. Yes, I know they'll survive... but I also know that there have been some differences since my arrival in this universe.

"This is a joke, right?" Tucker complained, "You're sending

Caboose."

"What's wrong with me?" Blue team's leader spoke up, a little too confident in himself, "I saw a chance to get rid of Caboose and I took it. There's nothing wrong with me."

"Maybe if you were a little nicer to Caboose, then you'd be able to understand what goes on in that head." I huffed.

"Okay, so, um, Tucker is a fighter, uh, Crunchbite is the healer, Walker can be the rouge, and I am the powerful... and intelligent, wizard. Morphumax." Caboose seemed too enthusiastic about this.

"Wait." I spoke up, "Which edition are we playing."

"Fifth, of course." He cheered.

"Eugh. Gross." I felt eyes staring me down, "What? I was a huge DnD fan in high school... I didn't have many friends."

"Yeah, we can tell." Church laughed.

"I'm gonna fuckin' die." Tucker spoke in defeat.

"Hyeah I guess this is it Tucker." Church attempted to sound sympathetic, "Nice knowin' ya."

"Hoh, you better hope that I don't die, 'cause if I do, you're the one taking care of my kids."

"You have kids?"

"Heheh probably."

"Whelp." I intervened the impending argument, "Let's get goin'."

* * *

><p>"Well, good luck guys." Church bid the group of Tucker, Caboose, Crunchbite, Andy, and soon Texas goodbye, "Don't forget to change your underwear at least once a day. Tucker, that goes double for you."<p>

"What? I'm the cleanest guy here." Tucker interjected.

"No. It goes double for you because now you're in charge of changing Caboose as well."

"I hate you."

"Blargh."

"He doesn't wear any pants." Andy translated.

"Yeah, we noticed. If we meet anybody on this adventure, that might have to change." Tucker spoke with a hint of anger in his tone.

"Why? We're used to being naked. Free-ballin', come on! Commando." Andy joked around.

"Oh god." I muttered as I turned to look at something... anything, really... in the opposite direction.

"Let me just put it this way;" Tucker spoke up once again, "I felt less threatened when Tex was staring at just the sword."

"Huh what- oh, fyeuh uhm, yeah, uh- I was just admiring his, his alien muscle structure." She defended.

"Yeah. One particular part of his muscle structure."

"Well that's just a matter of penis- I mean uh, opinion. Opinion, that's, that's it."

"Smooth." Church scoffed.

"You told me it was another arm." Caboose whimpered.

"Bluuuuuuuuuuuuuurgh!" The alien went off once again.

"Hey Caboose, high five!" Andy shouted.

"I don't want to do that anymore." He was disappointed.

"I say we go and get this trip over with... Please." I begged.

"Tucker, come over here. I want to talk to you for a second." Church pulled Tucker to the side as the three of us started walking to our destination. I honestly feel like I'm gonna regret this discussion... maybe it's because of the alien that's well known for impregnating people.

"Huuuur!"

"Hey ladies! Come on, hustle up!" Andy yelled at me and Tucker, "If you gotta use the bathroom, do it now 'cause I'm not pullin' over."


	29. Falsely Emotional

"I'm gonna die." Tucker repeated as we stopped in our tracks, looking over the burnt plains.

"Tucker." I snarled, "You've been saying that for the past half hour. For the last time, you're not gonna die."

"How do you know?" he questioned me.

"Because, according to Tex, I'm psychic." I said practically breathlessly.

"Please." He spoke in a sarcastic tone, "I know Tex was lying when she said that."

"Hey, if you two would stop bickering like an old married couple, then maybe we could get something done." Andy snapped at us.

"...You don't have to be an ass about it." I mumbled under my breath.

"Hey, don't make me count to one!" He threatened me.

I mumbled nonsense under my breath as I kicked some branches around, "I probably would've been in Blood Gulch by now."

"No you wouldn't 've." Tucker claimed me wrong, "Blood Gulch is probably lightyears away by now."

"Well, no matter how far it is, my stuff is over there... and I don't want someone ripping out the pages of my book for fire."

"First off, you have like fifty other books, somehow. Why would one being gone make a difference?"

"Because it has all my notes in it." I sighed, now walking ahead of the group.

"Blargh!" The alien yelled at me.

"Do you even know what you're up against?" Andy translated.

"Hey, I understand the language perfectly fine." I growled as I slid down the side of the cliff-like wall, "There's no need for a tin can to translate." Once I got to the bottom, which wasn't that far, I leaned against the wall and stared at the sky.

"Who're you callin' tin can, bitch." The bomb exploded... no, not literally, "Alright... She'll just distract the monster."

"Blargh!"

"Be quiet!"

"Argh!"

"Get down!"

"warg, warg arg. Warg larg!" The alien muttered.

"He just wants a moment's peace before the plan fails and we get killed."

"WHRRRRRRG!"

"Oh, sorry... I wasn't supposed to translate that last part. Yuh, he says, yuh don't worry, everything will be fine... stick to the plan."

"There's been a plan to begin with?" I giggled as I saw another vulture fly above. I feel like I should be worried... that looks like the same bird from earlier.

"Blargh?" The alien looked over the side to see me in one piece.

"How're you still alive?!" Andy was surprised.

"Obviously, I've defeated the monster." I said sarcastically, "I say we continue on and use the key."

"Hnk, blarg!?"

"Because I'm fuckin' psychic." I smiled, "Lead the way, fish-for-breath."

* * *

><p><strong>Many Years Ago: Freelancer.<strong>

"Intruder alert. Intruder alert. Breach in Security. Level Zero." F.I.L.S.S.'s voice echoed through the halls.

"Great job York." Tex sounded a little angry.

"I swear this never happens to me." York continued to fiddle with the lock.

"York, I'll be honest with you." I sighed, removing both pistols from my hips, raising my guard, "In all my six years here, I have never seen you successfully pick a lock or hack a mainframe."

"Look, we don't have much time." Tex moved York and punched the lock, causing the door to open, "Hamp, you're comin' with me. York, we need you to find a way to distract them." She began running.

"Be careful." I ran after her.

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day.<strong>

"Walker!" Tucker slapped me in the face.

"..." I watched him for a moment as my brain processed the given information, "What the hell was that for?!" I yelled.

"I'm sorry." He took a step back, "You were just standing there. You wouldn't respond to anything."

"No... that doesn't sound like me." I tilted my head to the side, "Unless, of course, I was having a seizure... In that case, it's completely plausible."

"You were standing upright."

"Seizures aren't all on the floor, thrashing, dumb ass." I started walking as Crunchbite turned around in order to lead the way. I turned my head to see Caboose and Tucker making hesitant movements, "I'm sorry for snapping." I sighed, "It's been stress since we got here. Let's just call it even and hurry up and get home."

"You've done that before." Caboose ducked his head, "You've done that thing where you'd just stand still and not talk before. Is it because of your anemia, again?"

"Wait. You have anemia?!" Tucker freaked out.

"Ugh." I groaned, "Caboose, for the last time, it's amnesia. Am-knee-zh-ah." I continued walking, "Damn. I'm surrounded by idiots."

"Well, I'm sorry I'm too dumb for you." Tucker sneered as he caught up to me.

"Well, you should." I smiled behind my helmet.

"Fight, fight, fight, fight!" Caboose started chanting, "Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss." He spoke in a lower voice.

"God dammit Joel." I whispered to the point where hopefully only I could hear. 'You know, they say that there's a danger in getting to close to someone.' I started thinking to myself, 'After a while, you'll be let down... and if that doesn't happen, then you're inseparable with whomever. Really, is that a bad risk?...' I let out a long sigh, 'Sure it is... Of course it is... At least in my case. All I want is to just be home. I want to see my parents... I wanna see my little brother... I wanna see Alzea, even if she ends up still mad at me.'

"Are you alright?" Tucker questioned me with that concerned tone of his that he did so well.

It was then that I decided I needed to put on a fake smile as I gave off short laugh, "Yeah. Of course I'm fine." My voice didn't even crack, and there was no sign of sadness. Maybe this is the approach to go. Maybe by using false emotions... I might be able to make it through.


	30. Mourning Sickness

**Alright guys. This should be the last chapter until Friday. I have to study for the test for my learner's permit. :) If I get any free time, I'll try to post a chapter or two, but I won't be making any promises... so, please enjoy!**

* * *

><p>We camped the night with Tex, now that she's finally caught up. Of course, all of use (aside from Tex) slept without our armor as I supplied the blankets. Do you even know how uncomfortable it is in those things?! I ended up being the only one waking up to a horrible, retching sound. I shot upright, seeing everyone was accounted for... except Tucker. I stood up and walked over to where the sound had been coming from to see our missing person hunched over with bile hanging down his lip. I walked over to him and sat down whist rubbing soothing circles on his back.<p>

"I still think I'm gonna die." He complained, voice sounding weaker than the day before.

"You probably got too cold last night." I lied, knowing what's actually happening.

"I'm really hungry." He whimpered, still in pain.

"I'm sorry." I spoke in a sympathetic tone, "I don't have food on me."

"But you always have something... be it a book, or an ipod, or blankets."

"Well, I'm sorry that food didn't come into consideration. Organic material don't turn out that well in storage."

"Then get the inorganic stuff. You know, like potato chips and hostess stuff."

"They still have that?" I was honestly surprised, then I ducked my head slightly, "I feel gypped." He gave off a weak laugh and leaned his head against my shoulder. I moved my hand away from his back and ran it through his dark colored hair a few times, taking into account of his caramel colored skin and green eyes... dammit Michele, now's not a good time, "I say we finish whatever mission this alien has for us and we hurry up and get home. Deal?"

"Define home." He spoke in almost a whisper.

"Well, I don't think the military will let you go to your actual home until the war's over, but I can guarantee you Blood Gulch."

"But we don't know where Blood Gulch is." He whined.

"I do., and I promise you we'll make it back."

"Who are you, really?"

"Excuse me?"

"Well, you're just so... awesome... I guess is the way to put it. You didn't have to come this way to help me out, but you did. That's something that only someone who cares would do."

I was taken back by this, contemplating on what to say next, "Well," I sighed, "I don't want to see anyone die on my team anymore... Not that you're gonna die. You'll be fine... but... There's an amount of death that one person's supposed to see in their lives. Let's just say that's I've seen long past my limit."

"If you don't want to see anymore death, then what are you still doing in the military?"

"..." I looked off to the side for a moment, "I don't know. Maybe it's because I have no where else to go. I don't have a place of living on any of the colony planets... and I don't think I'll be socially acceptable." I stood up as he followed, "Let's get back to camp. Once everyone's awake, the alien's gonna wanna go."

* * *

><p>"Step it up guys, we're almost there." Andy ordered us.<p>

"I'm tellin' you, the alien has really been creepin' me out lately." Tucker complained, "Every time I wake up, He's hovering over me. It's really weird."

"I'm sure he's just safeguarding his sword. I mean, my sword." Tex gave her theory.

"I think he does that to everyone." I turned my head around in order to face Tucker, "I woke up in the middle of the night once and he cut my arm open."

"Why the heck would he do that?" Tucker questioned me, surprise in his voice.

"I don't know." I turned my head back around, "But I can't kill him until the mission's over..."

"Hurry up ya idiots." Andy snapped.

"Man. Did it get a lot colder all of a sudden?" Tucker started complaining once again.

"Of course it did." Damn. We're lucky that bomb is tolerant of us, "They don't call it the Great Freezin' Plains for nothin'."

"Whoa." Tucker and I said together in complete and utter amazement as the snow fell down.

"I'm just glad I brought my mittens." Caboose practically cheered.

"Wait." I turned to face the man in blue, "You were assigned to Blood Gulch, a planet hotter than habitable climates, and you brought mittens?"

"The snow is the least of our problems." Tex pointed out.

"Why?" Andy questioned her.

"I assume we have to get to that big temple base thing."

"Yeah..."

"Well, it's got about two dozen guards on its walls."

"Oh no." Caboose said, fiddling around with on mitten.

"Yep. Doesn't look good."

"No no no. I mean I lost one of my mittens." Caboose turned his head in many directions, as if searching for his lost mitten, "Um... we have to go back."

"Caboose, we've been walking for days." Tucker looked as if he were about to slap the soldier in regulation blue, "We're not goin' back for anything."

"Suggestions Andy?" Tex asked.

"I say we let Tucker storm in and-" The bomb was interrupted.

"I think I have a better plan." I sighed, examining the facility, "Although, we'd probably have to map out the place before entering. It's easy to get the most part from the exterior." I sat down on the ground, "I'll need a paper and a pen."

"Or let me take them out, one by one." Tex stopped me, "They will never know what hit them."

"Fine." I pouted, "Screw Plan G. I see how it is." I stood up, "At least let me go with you."

"Do you even have a cloaking device?"

"Heck no." I laughed, "I have the element of surprise on my side."

"Alright. I won't be held responsible if you get killed." She started walking as I started moving along the wall of the box canyon.

"Ya think you can kill 'em all without alerting the rest?" Andy questioned his creator.

"Just watch me." She turned invisible. It wasn't any trouble getting into the temple thingy, really. What can I say? Bad habits die hard. And even though I went in through the completely opposite side of the base, I still managed to end up with Tex. Am I good, or am I good!

"Hey Reds!" One of the blue grunts yelled, "We're guarding the shit outta this wall. You suck!"

"Your wall's easy to guard. Try ours!" A red guy yelled back.

"You don't even have a roof up there. You suck. What're you guarding it from, birds?"

"You suck!"

"You suck!"

"I forgot about this guys." I mumbled as I tried to disregard the developing headache. Tex gave me a few hand signals from the other side of the door frame as I looked at the grunts we were to go after and nodded my head in agreement.

"I think I heard something." One of the red guys spoke up. After a moment, Tex charged in and attacked a blue grunt.

"OW, what the fuck, that hurt! Ow!" The grunt started screaming as Tex kept hitting him, "Ow! Ow! Jesus! Ow! Stop it! What the fuck? Ow, ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!" Tex pulled out her gun.

"Well, I'm gonna assume you know what you're doing." I started walking toward the next room.

"Now you're shooting me! Give me a break, this sucks! What the fuck did I ever do to you?! COME ONNNN!" It was then that I tripped and an alarm went off.

"I thought I told you to stay quiet!" Tex snapped at me as she charged into the other room.

"Because you obviously had that noise thing under control." I stood up and followed her as we approached a group of... twenty to thirty grunts... maybe.

"Huh?" They all said in sync with that unnaturally high pitch voices of their's.

"Hiya fellas." Tex said in a voice that even brought chills to my spine, "Who's next?"

"Charge!" They ran after us.

* * *

><p>"That was too easy." I sighed, dusting off my hands, "Let's hurry up and head outside before they respawn." Tex started running and I followed.<p>

"Get them!" A grunt yelled as we jumped off of the base.

"Hey, what's that thing!?" Tex watched as Crunchbite flew off in his ship, "Where's he going?"

"I don't know!" Andy answered her, "He just keeps saying, 'There it is, there it is!'"

"I thought you said there was no reward at the end of the quest."

"I didn't know!"

"Well, the sword's also a key." I said almost sheepishly.

"How did you know that?" Tucker questioned me.

"Andy..." Tex was pissed.

"Hey don't blame me. I'm just the translator!" Andy defended as the alien had been making it's way back toward us.

"Um, I think the Alien is coming back." Caboose pointed out, "Bad alien! Go away!"

"Get down!" Tex ordered as I pushed the red zealot behind us in front of me and dropped to the ground.

"What?" The grunt spoke up before the alien killed him, "Ohoh, hurk blarg."

"Ohhh. He wasn't coming to kill us." Caboose was relieved, "He was saving us. That's a good alien."

"Well, a deal's a deal." Tex sighed, "He owns me that ship. Andy, tell him to bring that thing down here and-" Just then, a rocket hit the ship.

"You still want it now?" I laughed as Tex glared at me.

"Tex! New Hampshire!" A man in white armor held a rocket launcher.

"Wyoming?" Texas and I asked in utter sync.

"Connecticut!" Caboose cheered.

"They're not playing a game, Caboose." Tucker corrected his teammate.

"Well, if they were, I woulda totally won."

"Well it appears I've spoiled your little game." Wyoming started talking, "So sorry, chums."

"That was my ship." Tex spoke with slight anger in her voice.

"Oh dear, then I stand corrected: I'm not sorry."

"You're gonna pay for that."

"All out of change at the moment. Get you next time. Cheerio!" Wyoming ran off.

"Get back here!" Tex followed him.

"Huh, that didn't go the way I expected." Tucker said his input.

"It went close enough to what I expected." I laughed, watching the alien's ship now catch on fire.

"You think we should wait for her to come back? Or finish the quest on our own. Or just go home." Just then, trumpets began to sound.

"Charge!" The sound of the red and blue zealots went off.

"Yeah, let's just go home." Tucker said hurriedly.

"I second that." I said as we started walking.


	31. Please Don't Go

"Oh, look who's back. The conquering heroes." Church greeted us upon entry, "What's up guys?"

"Meh." Tucker answered for all of us.

"Hey, where's Tex?" The leader of blue started looking around.

"Gone."

"Where's the alien?"

"Dead."

"Well how'd the quest go."

"Failed."

"There was no point in you even asking that question." I sighed, looking around the canyon... Maybe I should get back to daily runs... Damn you, old habits.

"Eh. I wouldn't say 'failed,'" Andy piped, "but these guys definitely screwed it up royally."

"What? We didn't do anything." Tucker practically snapped.

"Exactly." The bomb said in a somewhat sarcastic voice, "You let the girls do all the work and got the alien killed."

"Yeah, but doing nothing is what we do. So, technically we didn't screw anything up."

"It's true, I have a first place ribbon in doing nothing." Caboose spoke up in a nearly sad tone, "It's the same ribbon as last place. It's purple."

"Well is Tex okay?" Church questioned us once again.

"She's fine, as far as we know." I sighed, looking at the base, "But she did run after Wyoming."

"Tex?"

"Yeah." Tucker answered.

"Wyoming?"

"Yes."

"Massachusetts." Caboose cheered.

"We get it, Caboose." I huffed.

"Guys," Leader of blue started scolding us, "why didn't you tell me this?"

"Tell you when? We just got here." There was a hint of anger in the man in teal's (still don't know what color that is) voice.

"Yeah, but you've been wasting my time gabbing about your stupid failed quest."

"This conversation's stupid, and I'm hungry. Where's the food?" He started walking toward the base.

"Listen. Any time you have new information for me, just tell it to me as quickly as possible, Okay?"

"Well here's one short, blanket statement that covers all future situations: We suck."

"I said new information."

"Well, shit." I sighed as I followed Tucker.

"And where do you think you're going?" Church yelled after me.

"I've been dealing with mood swings, Caboose's state game, and a lack of food because the alien only offered us Larvae." I sighed, honestly trying not to snap, "I think I deserve a glass of orange juice and a cookie."

"Fine." He waved his hand dismissively as I made my way to the kitchen.

"What do you want?" Tucker huffed as he sifted through the pantry, already out of armor.

"You're not the only one who's hungry." I laughed as I grabbed three packs of instant noodles and turned on the stove top.

"Well, could you make me some?" He asked as he handed me a pot.

"That's what I'm doing." I laughed, "You think I'd be able to eat three of these on my own?" I put the pot under the sink, filled it with water, then placed to on the stove. After that, I started taking my armor off, piling it up in a neat pile fairly out of the walk-way.

"Y-yeah." He said, not paying attention.

"If I catch you looking at my ass, I'm gonna hit you." I sighed, watching the water and waiting for it to boil.

"That's only if you catch me." He laughed as he opened the fridge, "You want the last beer?"

I turned to face him, "Um... I don't drink, but I'd rather you not."

"And why not?" His voice was stern and nearly angry.

"Well..." I glanced at the water I set to boil then brought my attention back to him, "Because I said so?"

"That's not an actual reason." He chimed as he pulled out the bottle and closed the refrigerator door.

I watch for a moment as he opened the bottle, "Well, I have never had alcohol. It's worth a try, right?"

"Didn't you say you were raised in different countries?" He laughed, handing me the bottle, "It should've been available."

I took the bottle and set it down next to me, "Yeah... I guess." I said, sheepishly. I just didn't like the idea of killing off my brain cells, well I'm gonna have to try it. Just as I brought the bottle to my lips, Tucker hunched over the sink and started vomiting. Saved by the demon within!

"Yeah. This is hell." He sputtered as he barely managed to support himself on the counter.

"Alright." I sighed, rubbing his back, trying not to look at the contents of the sink, "Just calm down, okay." I turned on the sink so that everything would end up going down the drain.

"Who're you to tell me to calm down!" He snapped, "I'm perfectly cal-" He threw up again as he lost control of his breathing patterned, "I'm gonna die like this, aren't I?" He was nearly on the verge of tears.

"That's just the hormones talking." I ruffled his hair as I started to walk away, "I'll go find a bucket for you."

"Please don't leave me." He whined like a child.

I sighed as I turned off the stovetop, "I'll be right back."

"Please... Just don't go." He begged me.

"Alright." I walked back over to him and continued to rub his back, "Don't make me regret it." I gave off a short laugh as he started to calm down.

"Thank you." He mumbled with a small smile on his face.


	32. I'm Sorry

"Tucker?" I knocked on the man's teal bedroom door, holding a bowl of instant noodles with my other hand. I opened the door to see him hugging his legs as he rest his head on his knees, "Hey, you alright?"

"No." He groaned. He was obviously suffering.

"You still hungry?" I held the bowl in front of him as he looked up and took it out of my hands.

"Thanks." He sighed as he brought his back to the wall behind him.

"Any time." I laughed as I sat down in a chair and pulled a granola bar out of my pocket.

"Is that all you're gonna eat?"

"Meh." I unwrapped it and took a bite, "It doesn't take much to fill me." I swallowed the food that had been in my mouth, "And besides, the trick to maintaining a decent weight is eating a little bit every couple of hours. I'll just have a good size meal later."

"You're concerned about your weight?" He laughed as if what I was saying had been nonsence.

"Yeah." I sighed, "I've been concerned with appearances for as long as I can remember. It must be some kinda sickness."

"You shouldn't have to." He gave me a weak smile, "You're really beautiful."

"Thanks?" I returned the smile, "But I'm sure you tell that to all the ladies."

"Only those that deserve it." He shrugged as he began to slurp the somewhat cooled off noodles, "Wow! This is good! Did you add something to it?"

"Why does everyone ask that?" I sighed as someone began gently rapping, gently tapping at the chamber door, "I'll be right back." I stood up, taking the metal bucket by the bed, and walked out the door as Church walked in.

"Hey, are you alright?" Church asked as the door closed behind him and I made my way to the kitchen.

"Quit cock-blocking me!" Tucker yelled when he thought I was out of earshot as I rinsed the bucket off. _Crash!_ The sound of something being thrown and broken echoed through the halls.

"Well, pregnancy's outta the question for my future." I sighed, "Whatever lucky guy gets me better not be expecting children." I looked at my reflection in the water as Tucker's words went on loop, "H-he didn't actually mean that, did he?" I felt a smile creep up on me before slowly fading, "No. Of course he didn't. Be smart, Walker. He's only interrested in sex." I emptied the now clean bucket and held it close, "...But what if he's being honest?" I let out a heavy sigh, "If that's true, then I must be dreaming... Look at me. I'm talking to myself as if I'm two separate people." I slowly walked up to the door, debating whether or not to open the door. I looked down to see my hand shaking. Honestly, I don't know the circumstances as to why my hand had been behaving as it did, but before I know it, I was back inside Tucker's room.

"Hey, you alright?" Tucker had been watching me, snapping me back into focus.

"Wha? Um... Yeah." I walked up to him and placed the bucket back next to his bed.

"You look like something's bothering you." He looked into my eyes as I tried to avoid eye contact.

"No. I'm alright." I started to walk, but he loosly grabbed onto my wrist.

"Just tell me what's wrong." He asked in a nearly calming tone.

I turned around, tears probably welling up in my eyes, as I tried to tell him what I had been thinking, but no words came out, "... I... I'm... sorry." Was all I managed to say as I got out of his grip and left the room, quietly closing the door behind me before entering my room (which was immediatly next door). After I closed and locked the door, I quickly slid down the door, "What the hell have I done?"I muttered as I felt the tears rush down my cheeks.


End file.
